DARIA THE MIGHTY
by Anguirus1955
Summary: When Daria Morgendorffer is caught in the crossfire between an alien police officer and an alien criminal, she finds herself sharing a body with the police officer, an Alterran named Birdy Cephon. On the trail of dangerous criminal Christella Revy, Birdy must keep both herself and Daria alive while also trying to save the Earth from Revy's dangerous schemes.
1. Episode 1-01: Two Souls, One Body

**DARIA THE MIGHTY**

[Note: this story takes place within the 2010's, and does not follow the exact timeline of the original Daria series. The characters' ages remain the same, simply with everything updated to reflect the change in setting. Also, certain events from the series have occured in slightly different manner and order. Also, this is a crossover with the original Birdy OVA, not the Decode TV Series, although some elements, such as certain villains, will be borrowed from that adaptation for the sake of this crossover.]

Birdy the Mighty is property of Studio Madhouse.

Daria and Beavis and Butthead are property of Glenn Eichler, Mike Judge, and MTV.

Episode 01 - Two Souls, One Body

* * *

It was Wednesday night, and Daria Morgendorffer was walking home from Jane Lane's house. Feeling slightly hungry, she'd decided to stop at Pizza King to get one slice of pizza before resuming her trek home. As with most nights in Lawndale during the fall, the weather was somewhat chilly, but not too cold.

As Daria turned a corner on a sidewalk, she heard a loud noise. She turned her head to see a large greenish light bloom from the vicinity of the next street over, just before the sound and light of an explosion drew the attention of everyone around her. Her eyes widened as another explosion tore through the street near her.

People began to panic and Daria ran in the direction that would take her home the fastest. A few minutes later, she turned a corner just as a man in a light trench coat came barreling out of an alley. Daria ran into him and fell back to the pavement of the sidewalk. "Hey, you gotta help me! Someone's after me," the man said.

Daria looked at him. He was slightly heavy-set and he had poorly trimmed facial hair. his hair was black, and his eyes had a nervous and panicked look about them. "Why do you need the help of a teenage girl?" Daria asked him. "Please, do you live in this town?" he asked her. "Yes," Daria replied. "Then you might know where I can hide!"

"I only moved here recently, so you should probably ask someone else. And I really don't want to get involved in whatever business you have," Daria said as she tried to move around the man. " _Please, help me!_ " he begged her.

"Listen, I don't want to get-" "Giga!" came a female voice from an alley. The man, who Daria now presumed to be Giga, turned around and Daria watched with fascination as his neck and throat bulged, with two orange eyes, one of each side, revealing themselves as his throat opened to reveal a set of teeth, before his jaws parted and a blue glow traveled up his throat.

The glow ended when a blue bolt of energy shot out of his mouth, and destroyed a parked car next to the sidewalk. Daria stood completely still in shock at what had just transpired in front of her. When she regained her senses, she tried to back away as the man turned to look at her.

"Nice try, Giga," said the female voice again. Daria and Giga both looked over to see a woman walking through the flames, almost unhurt. Her hair had two colors, pinkish orange and white. Her outfit was form-fitting and was tan and white with sections of blue. Giga grabbed Daria by the waist and ran back into an alley before jumping up to a roof top.

The woman followed and jumped up, just as Giga threw Daria at her. The woman, expecting an attack from Giga, grabbed Daria and let loose with an electrical shock attack. Daria screamed in pain before hanging limply in the woman's hold.

The woman's eyes widened as she realized just what she had done. "Uh-oh," Giga said mockingly from a corner of the rooftop. "You just killed a native. A sentient one at that, Birdy," Giga said before he jumped down and ran away into the night.

Birdy looked back at Daria's body. _There should still be enough time_ , she thought to herself before she took off, Daria's body still in her grasp.

Line Break

Daria opened her eyes and blinked slowly. She was naked and the world around her was dark, and she felt weightless. _This is...peaceful. It's...so peaceful. I don't think I want to wake up. I haven't felt so... good in such a long time_ , Daria thought to herself before she heard two voices echoing around her.

"I couldn't avoid it when Giga threw her at me! I just reacted!" a somewhat familiar female voice could be heard saying. " **I don't want to hear excuses** ," said a firm male voice. There was a tone of authority in his voice. " **Officer Birdy Altera Cephon, you've made a grievous error**." "I know." " **Your methods were unsound. Are you ready?** "

"No way! I don't want to share a body with this human! I don't want to share a body with anyone!" Birdy protested. " **That is unfortunate, for this is the only way to save her life, at least until repairs are finished. You must hurry, before the window closes** ," the other voice said. "Fine, I'll do it, but I'm really not into this," Birdy said reluctantly.

 _What? What are they talking about?_ Daria was very curious before a bright light engulfed her and she saw the body of the woman coming towards her. "I just hope this doesn't last too long," Birdy said as she grabbed Daria by the shoulders.

Line Break

Daria Morgendorffer opened her eyes as she got out of bed. She looked over at her alarm clock. It was only six in the morning. She quietly walked over into the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror while brushing her teeth. The first thing she noticed was the she had forgotten to put on her glasses. The second thing she noticed was that while her vision wasn't perfect, it was still far better than it should have been.

After rinsing out her mouth and using the toilet, washing her hands afterwards and splashing water on her face to make sure that she was really awake, Daria returned to her room and got dressed. "This is too weird," she muttered to herself before she put on her glasses. Her vision with them seemed normal. She took them off and then put them back on again.

"What the hell?" she asked herself quietly before she left her room and made her way downstairs. She heard the bathroom door close as her sister Quinn entered it. "Guess I woke up just in time," she muttered to herself before she reached the bottom of the stairs.

Her father, Jake, was sitting down at the table reading the newspaper. "Morning, Dad," Daria said flatly as she grabbed a bowl and prepared some cereal for herself. "Morning, Kiddo," Jake replied as he looked up from his paper. "Hey, did you hear about those explosions last night?" Jake asked her.

"Huh?" Daria asked as she got the milk out of the fridge. "You didn't hear? Last night some arsonist went around blowing things up! It was all over the news. Your mother and I were worried sick until you showed up around midnight," Jake said.

"Midnight?" Daria asked. She didn't remember arriving home at all last night, which was strange. "Yeah! Your mother was ready to ground you until I convinced her that you showing up alive was the most important thing," Jake said. "Um... thanks. I don't really remember any of it, though," Daria said as she poured the milk into the bowl before returning it to the fridge.

"So, what time did Quinn return home from her date then?" Daria asked. "Around nine, actually. That's what made us worry," Jake replied. "Hmm," Daria said before she started eating her breakfast.

Later, Daria had met up with Jane on her way to school. "Hey, Jane, I wanted to apologize for some of the things I said to you last night. You're... not still upset about what I said last night, are you?" Daria asked her. "Not everything. You did have a point about a few things," Jane said. Daria had actually gone to Jane's house to apologize for her outburst in public the previous day, but had only ended up arguing with her again before heading home.

"So, did you hear about what happened last night? Someone went around throwing cherry bombs and stuff around town. I would've loved to take some pictures to use for my paintings," Jane said. "Jane, this may sound strange... but I don't remember anything from last night after stopping at Pizza King on the way home after leaving your place," Daria said.

"Nothing? When did you get home?" Jane asked her. "Sometime around midnight, according to my dad," Daria replied. A brief flash of her violent meeting with the woman with dual-colored hair went through her mind, before she dismissed it. "Daria, you okay?" Jane asked. "Huh?" Daria asked her. "You spaced out there for a minute," Jane explained to her. "Oh. Did I?" Daria asked. "Yeah. It was weird," Jane said.

"This whole morning has been weird for me," Daria said. "Really? Care to explain," Jane asked her. "I can see better without my glasses on than I used to," Daria replied slowly. "Um, okay. Just how bad was your vision before that?" Jane asked her.

"I was almost blind without my glasses before last night, but now my vision is only moderately bad without them. Something really strange is happening, and I know that it isn't puberty. The monthly visits of the Red Baroness have already ensured _that_ ," Daria replied.

Unbeknownst to the two girls, a black car was silently following them. "That's the girl from last night," Giga said quietly to the blond man sitting in the driver's seat. The man had a muscular build, which wasn't entirely apparent from his suit, and he had a blond mustache and sunglasses on.

"Didn't you say that Office Cephon killed her?" the man asked Giga. "Yes, Gomez, but there she is, walking, talking and breathing like nothing's happened," Giga replied suspiciously. "I'm sure that _she_ has something to do with it," Giga grumbled.

"In that case, we had better clear this up before Miss Revy returns," Gomez said in a gravely voice. "It isn't that simple, Gomez," Giga replied. "What if this is a ploy to lure me or us back out? We should try laying low or at least observing her from a distance before we do anything that might draw attention to ourselves," Giga said.

"You mean... just wait it out and hope that Officer Cephon thinks you've left town?" Gomez asked him with a smirk. "You know that won't work on her, at least not without waiting a very long time, that is," Gomez added. "I _know that_ , Gomez," Giga replied angrily.

Line Break

"Now, class," Timothy O'Neill said, "Last night there was a horrible tragedy when someone went around committing acts of arson in town. Does anybody wish to share how they feel about this act of violence and... well, disregard for the safety of their fellow human beings?"

 _Oh, come on! Is this all anybody is going to be talking about today?_ **Probably** , replied a voice in Daria's head. Daria's eyes widened after hearing the voice. She looked around to see if perhaps she had voiced her question out loud and someone had responded, but Mr. O'Neill had not focused his attention on her at all, which he normally would have done if she had asked such a question.

Jodie Landon raised her hand. "Yes, Jodie?" O'Neill asked her. "Well, I guess that it _is_ rather... _startling_ that someone would go around blowing up cars and buildings like that," Jodie replied. "Daria, what do _you_ think of last nights horrible events?" O'Neill asked her.

 _Why does he always call on me?_ "Well, I actually don't remember anything about what happened last night until I got out of bed this morning. I also don't really know if enough information has been gathered for anyone to really present a clear picture of what happened. Without that, how do we know if this was deliberate or a series of unfortunate coincidences?" Daria replied.

"Hmm, that _is_ a good point, Daria. Has enough time really passed for us to gather enough information about the incident so that we can form a clear and educated opinion on it? Perhaps we should look at similar incidents in the past and see how people have reacted to those tragedies as well," O'Neill said pensively.

"Thanks to Daria's suggestion, I have an interesting homework assignment for all of you: research incidents such this from our past and discover how people reacted to them, as well as the background information that led up to those incidents in order to provide context for what happened and how people were affected," O'Neill said.

"Um, what about our class assignment for today?" Michael "Mack" McKenzie asked Mr. O'Neill. "Oh, yes! I'd almost forgotten," O'Neill said. **You put up with _this_ every day?** Daria's breath hitched for just a second, unnoticed by everyone except Jane, who subtly raised an eyebrow in curiosity.

In the hallway after class, Jane looked at Daria curiously. "Hey, Daria, are you okay? You've been acting kind of off all morning," Jane said. "Jane, I'm not really sure how to explain it, but I think I might be going crazy," Daria said. "Really?" Jane asked with a chuckle. She saw the sincerity on Daria's face and stopped her chuckling.

"You're serious," Jane said. "Yes. I'll explain more later, but first... we have Ms. Morris again," Daria said as both girls headed off for Gym class. "Oh, about that... I'm thinking things will be a little bit more harsh than usual for us," Jane said. "Why's that? Well, I, uh... quit the team yesterday," Jane revealed.

"You... quit the team?" "Yup. And then Miss Morris tried to blackmail me into staying by threatening to flunk my math grades if I didn't come back. I threatened to tell Miss Li and the PTA... but they all know. There's really no one on our side here," Jane said in a forlorn manner. "So, is she going to flunk you?" Daria asked her. "No. I threatened to tell each of the three local televisions news stations that the other two stations were reporting on it," Jane said with a smirk.

"Why didn't you tell me last night?" Daria asked her. "I tried, but you were _quite_ insistent on hearing your own voice," Jane said. "Oh. I guess I screwed up, didn't I?" Jane nodded her head. "You did, but... you're only human," she said.

 **Um... not quite anymore** , Birdy thought, almost causing Daria to jump out of her skin. "Daria, are you okay? Oh, right, going crazy and stuff. Almost forgot about that, but seriously, what is up with you? Come on, spill," Jane said as they made their way to the locker room. "I'll tell you... after school," Daria said. "Fair enough," Jane replied.

Line Break

"I didn't think things could get any more pathetic," Daria said she and Jane both performed the cheer-leading practices that Morris had sneaked into class, "Obviously, I was wrong." "Come on Ladies," Miss Morris said with a clap, "You've got a lot of work to make up." "Cheer-leading practice during gym class. God damn it," Daria muttered.

"Tell me that I at least have my integrity," Jane pleaded. "Integrity is a funny word," Daria replied. "Well, then, at least tell me I'm marginally less corrupt than the jocks," Jane asked her. Daria sighed, and felt a strange sensation in the back of her head, with the vague feeling of memories rushing through her, but not quite actually experiencing it.

"You refused to participate in a crooked system where good grades are exchanged for athletic performance; however, you didn't try to reform the system either," Daria replied in a thoughtful tone. "For fear of complete teenage exile," Jane added.

"And so the system continues, you haven't redeemed yourself, and we're both ostracized anyway," Daria finished. "Come on, now, stop trying to paint a rosy picture," Jane replied. "You know what I just realized?" Daria asked her. "Um, no. Care to tell me?" Jane asked her. "They really _are_ preparing us for the real world," Daria replied.

"So the real world sucks as much as high school. I guess life just sucks in general," Jane said. "Hey, ladies! Keep moving!" Morris said with sadistic pleasure. "Yeah, yeah, I hear you," Daria said uncharacteristically. Dari blushed and widened her eyes at her outburst, while Jane could only watch with shock.

 **Sorry, got a bit carried away there. I'll try to be more restrained in the future** , Birdy said to Daria, mentally. Daria was beginning to panic. _I don't know if I can hold out until school's over_ , she thought to herself.

Line Break

"Are you sure it's a good idea to call this guy in?" Giga asked Gomez. "This guy's a professional. He'll keep an eye on the girl and if it _is_ Officer Cephon in disguise, he'll eliminate her at a convenient time, but if it really is just a civilian bystander, he won't take any action," Gomez explained.

"He'll be discrete, and he won't be traced back to us?" Giga asked. "Well, he's already known for having interacted with Officer Cephon before, so it would be easy for someone to assume that he simply attacked her for revenge after encountering her," Gomez said with a grin.

"You're certain?" Giga asked. "Of course. He's been hiding out on this planet for a few local months anyway, so it wouldn't be unreasonable for any Federation officers to assume that Birdy met him by accident," Gomez explained.

"What if Officer Cephon survives the encounter?" Giga asked. "Then _she_ will assume that he attacked her out of revenge," Gomez replied.

"And...no chance of this being traced to us? What if it just makes Officer Cephon stick around even longer? Our base is located in this town; we can't just leave without stalling the operation!" Giga said. "Relax, Giga. You worry too much," Gomez said.

"I don't like it. This could take too long," Giga said. "I'll go observe her myself," he said as he left the basement of their hideout. "You idiot," Gomez said quietly.

Line Break

After school, Daria and Jane were walking home. "So, school's over for the day," Jane said, "I guess this means you can explain some things to me?" "Well, this morning, when I woke up... I couldn't remember anything from last night after leaving your house and stopping at Pizza King," Daria said. "Mmhmm, you already explained that," Jane said.

"Well... I heard a strange voice in my head a few times today," Daria said. "A strange voice? Did it tell you to do anything?" Jane asked. "No. It was just asking questions about things," Daria replied. "What kind of things?" Jane asked her carefully.

"School, people around me... like someone just coming to Earth for the first time," Daria explained slowly. "Hmm, You didn't get injured or hit on the head sometime last night, did you?" Jane asked. The image of that woman zapping her sprang forth, but Daria dismissed it as a bad dream.

"Well, I did have this bizarre dream," Daria started. "Oh, and what happened in this dream of yours?" Jane asked as they drew closer to Jane's house. "Well, there was this guy with a trench coat, and there was this woman. She had a strange uniform on, and her hair was split into two colors. Orange, or pink, and white, or silver. She looked like she was not much older than us," Daria explained.

"And the guy? You mentioned a guy," Jane said. "The guy... he seemed normal at first, but then his neck... he-oh my-" everything came crashing back into Daria's head at that moment and she collapsed onto her knees. "Daria!?" Jane asked concerned.

"Hey, Amiga, speak to me!" Jane implored. "Oh my god," Daria whispered as she clutched her head in panic. "Did they do something to you!?" Jane asked her. She remembered Daria saying that she hadn't arrived home until around midnight, according to what she'd been told by her father.

"Daria, we'd better go to the police. If these people..." Jane stopped talking as she looked up to see a man in a trench coat walking towards them. As he got closer, Jane could see a nasty smile on his face and a malevolent gleam in his eyes. _Daria mentioned a guy in a trench coat. Please tell me this is just a coincidence_ , Jane thought to herself.

"Can we... help you?" Jane asked him. "Your friend can. I'd like to see her face," the man said. "Why?" Jane asked him suspiciously. "Just let me see her face," he said impatiently, reaching one hand into one of his pockets. Jane gulped.

"I think... you'd better just leave us alone," Jane said as she moved to put herself between this man and Daria, who was still clutching her head and shaking. "I don't have time for this," he growled as he rushed forward and pushed Jane out of the way. "Come here," he growled as he yanked Daria off the ground and pulled her face up to his.

"You're supposed to be dead!" he declared angrily. Jane snapped her head up and widened her eyes at the man's words. "Doesn't matter. You'll be dead again soon anyway," Giga said. "But first... tell me where Birdy is." **Time to switch**. Daria was on the verge of tears, until a strange calm overtook her, and her eyes, face, and even her hair began to change. Jane watched the transformation in fascination.

"Nice to see you again, Giga," Birdy said with a smirk as she grabbed Giga's arms and lifted them away from her neck, before she kneed Giga in the crotch and lept away from him. Giga turned to look at Birdy. She was still wearing Daria's clothes, but otherwise it was her body.

"Damn you, Cephon!" Giga growled as he transformed. His neck begna to bulge and extend as two orange-yellow eyes came out, and his throat opened to reveal two rows of teeth, before his neck extended and he leaped into the air, shooting a ball of energy from his mouth to the ground. Birdy grabbed Jane and lept away from the bolt.

"What the hell is going on!?" Jane asked in terror. "Don't worry, you'll be fine," Birdy said. "Daria, what is this!?" "I'm not Daria, but she is sharing my body. I'll explain later, but first I need to take care of Giga," Birdy said as she deposited Jane behind a fence and lept over to kick Giga in the face.

Giga stumbled back in recoil from the attack. Giga's throat swelled into a pouch as he let loose another attack. Birdy lept forward and punched right through it, hitting Giga in the throat. He hissed in pain as he stepped back, not noticing the small object that Birdy had planted on his chest. Birdy lept into the air and kicked him again, sending him flying into a street light pole. Giga slumped against the pole.

"Alright, Giga," Birdy began, "I think it's time you gave me some answers. First off, where is Christella Revy?" "Do you actually think I'll tell you?" Giga asked her in a pained tone. "You'll certainly feel less guilty," Birdy replied. "How dare you... It won't matter anyway," Giga said in defeat. Birdy sighed in resignation as she realized that questioning Giga further would be pointless.

"I guess I have no choice. I'll be sending you on your way now," Birdy said as she removed a strange triangular device from her hair and aimed it at Giga. She pressed down on the remote and the object on Giga's body glowed bright blue before he was engulfed in a blue orb, which quickly became opaque and rose into the air before floating away.

Birdy turned around and saw Jane peering out from behind the fence. "So... where should I start?" Birdy asked her.

Line Break

"Dammit," Gomez muttered to himself as he watched Birdy speaking with the other girl in the distance. "Giga, you really were an idiot," Gomez said as he waited for the two females to walk away before driving off.

Line Break

"Why are we in the Lawndale Junkyard?" Jane asked Birdy. "This is where I stashed my ship," Birdy replied as they approached a large, strangely organized pile of old cars. They approached the red car in the very middle and Birdy opened the door, ushering Jane to go first. "Are you _serious?_ " Jane asked her. "This whole place is a death trap," she said to Birdy.

"Would it help if Daria were in control?" Birdy asked her. "What does _that_ mean?" Jane asked her. "Here, watch," Birdy said as she transformed back into Daria. "Jane... please help me. I don't know what's going on any more than you do and I need help," Daria said. "Okay, then you go first," Jane said.

 **Come on, Daria. Go first. After all, it's best if both of you are brought up to speed at the same time. This way, we'll have an ally** , Birdy said to Daria. Daria took a deep breath and climbed into the car. She paused when she saw a white, round door unlock itself and open, releasing a hiss of air.

"What is that?" Jane asked from behind her. "I think we're about to find out," Daria said as they both crawled inside the strange white object. "Well, down the rabbit hole we go," Jane snarked. "That's my line," Daria said.

Both girls soon entered another set of doors, before winding up in a large room bathed in blue light. They looked around and saw two chairs over by a strange looking console and a large screen, and to their right was an open chamber of some kind. A light soon emanated from it, and both girls backed away.

Soon, the hologram of a strange creature, an insect of sorts wearing a black and red uniform with a robe over-top of it. "What the..." Jane trailed off. The insect creature looked over at the girls, studying them, before tilting his head. " _Daria Morgendorffer_ ," he said in a slightly accented English, " _I am Inspector Maebius of the Space Federation_ ," the bug said.

" _This hologram is being transmitted from a space station. I am doing this so that I can explain things for you. Although, I am unfamiliar with the girl by your side_ ," Maebius said. "Uh... I... I'm Jane. Jane Lane," Jane said quickly, still somewhat shocked by the whole situation. " _Hello, Jane_ ," Maebius said. " _Now, it is very important that both of you listen carefully to what I am about to tell you, especially **you** , Daria Morgendorffer_," Maebius said.

" _Every cell of your entire body is already dead_ ," Maebius said bluntly. "W-What?" Daria asked him, clearly shocked. "But... what about this body? How can it be dead?" she asked him. " _Simple_ ," Maebius replied. " _That is **not** your body_."

"What?" Daria asked, confused. "Yeah, what do you mean that isn't her body?" Jane asked him. " _Allow me to explain_ ," Maebius said. " _This was the result of an accident. I know that this must be a lot for you to take in, and that it cannot be easy for you to forgive Officer Cephon for her actions_."

"I... I don't think I understand," Daria said. "If this isn't my body, then whose body is it?" she asked Maebius. " _We merged you with another body, that of Officer Birdy Altera Cephon, in order to save your life_ ," Maebius explained as holographic footage of Birdy began playing for the girls. The footage showed Birdy performing various tasks and exercising, as well as apprehending criminals of various species. " _Officer Birdy Cephon is an Ixioran Class Alterian Humanoid. She possesses the same cellular form as humans. This made it especially easy to use her body for the merging process_."

"Merging process?" Daria asked. " _Yes. The cell mass was reconfigured to match your physical body. We have not changed your physiological functions. We have made sure that this will not affect your daily living. Currently, a replacement body is being developed for you, so when it is complete, the merge will be undone and you will be placed in this new body. Then Officer Cephon can return to her normal duties afterwards_ ," Maebius said.

" _This may seem rather difficult to accept, but it is the truth_ ," Maebius said to the girls in a calm and almost reassuring manner. Daria looked down at herself and her hands in a confused and then resigned manner. "So... what about my memories? Am I still me?" Daria asked Maebius. " _Of course you are. Why would you not be?_ " he asked her, puzzled.

"I guess... I still _feel_ the same," Daria said. "Aside from the other person sharing that body and speaking in your head," Jane said. "Thanks, Jane. That makes it sound so much better," Daria snarked. "I do what I can," Jane said. "Well, you should-ack," Daria said as she grasped her head.

A strange memory that was not her own took over. She was in a corridor bathed in red light, and in the middle was a large amount of debris from a hole in the ceiling. "What-what is this?" Daria asked. " _I take it that you are starting to experience one of Birdy's memories by now. Her memories are etched within you as you both share the same body now_ ," Maebius explained.

Daria returned to the memory, and in the middle of the debris was a large robotic figure, rising out of it. A young Birdy, with shorter hair and a higher-pitched voice, ran through a corridor, yelling for someone, before coming across the large, robotic monstrosity. It had huge arms and raised one of them. Just as it brought its right arm down to strike, a figure jumped in front of her and knelt down to shield her.

The figure had the same uniform as Birdy, and short hair. There was a splash of blood on the ground as the robotic monstrosity took a chunk out of her back. The older female then slumped to her side and fell to the ground. A female voice rang out. "Are you impressed..." The young Birdy turned to look at the woman who'd addressed her.

She had a dark uniform with unknown colors, and a cape over her shoulders, along with long hair. "With this little gift from Christella Revy?" she finished slowly, a malicious smile on her face and a look of satisfaction in her eyes. The young Birdy was horrified and shocked, her mouth agape and unable to move. She then placed her arms on the older female and begged her to not die. "Please! Please!" Young Birdy begged.

It was no use. The older female was dead. "Biley!" Young Birdy whimpered over and over again, as the memory began to fade. Daria soon looked up at Maebius. " _Daria Morgendorffer... I sincerely hope that you will cooperate with us_ ," Maebius requested in a gentle calm but firm manner. He'd clearly had a lot of experience dealing with people in his life time.

" _Please... take care of Birdy for me, as she will try to take care of you for your family, whether they know about the situation or not_ ," Maebius said as the hologram began to fade away. " _And you, Jane, please watch over them both_." The girls were then left in the dark as the hologram completely disappeared.

"So, what do we do?" Jane asked Daria. "I don't know," Daria replied. "I honestly have no idea what to do." "This... this _is_ all real, isn't it?" Daria asked Jane. "Yes, Daria," Jane said as she placed a hand on her friend's shoulder. "At least... at least you have me here to help you out," Jane said, trying to look on the bright side.

"And besides, this is only temporary. That alien said that your body was being rebuilt, so eventually, you can go back to that, and then everything can go back to normal," Jane said to her. "I don't think anything will ever be normal again, Jane," Daria replied. "No, but at least you'll have your own body again," Jane said. "True. So, where do we go from here?" Daria asked. "I wish I knew," Jane said. "I really wish I knew."

Ending Line Break

Ending Theme: Mad Machine, by Kinuko Ohmori, from Bubblegum Crisis OST 2: Born To Kill.


	2. Episode 1-02: Combat Duet

**DARIA THE MIGHTY**

Birdy The Mighty is property of Studio Madhouse.

Daria and Beavis and Butthead are property of Glenn Eichler, Mike Judge, and MTV.

Episode 02: Combat Duet

* * *

After Daria and Jane returned to Casa Lane, as Jane's home was often called, the two retired to Jane's room to try and put things into perspective. "Okay...I'm sharing a body with an alien from outer space," Daria said after letting a breath go.

"Nothing weird about that. I'm sure this happens all the time," she said to herself in her usual monotone, with a few cracks in her voice. "It just...wait. That guy said that this body would be identical to my old one... so why can I see moderately well without my glasses?" Daria asked.

 **Because my own vision is just fine. This was the only area where a compromise was made, as I refuse to have my vision completely regressed. If I have to fight someone and those glasses were to fall off, we would be in big trouble,** Birdy explained. _But... I thought my normal life wouldn't be interrupted,_ Daria replied mentally.

 **We will proceed with your normal activities as you usually perform them, but in the event that someone shows up who I am required to take care of, then I need to transform and perform my duties. We won't deliberately go searching for trouble unless a preemptive strike is the best option for dealing with a viable threat,** Birdy explained.

 _Okay, but then what if my family catches us in the middle of a transformation? How do we deal with that?_ _**I**_ **will worry about that. If you want to make up some stupid excuse on your own, go ahead, but I think it would be best if we were to be honest with them. Otherwise, who knows what lengths they may go to in order to learn the truth?**

 **Oh! I almost forgot,** Birdy said as a strange triangular device appeared on the top of Daria's wrist. Jane leaned over to inspect it. "What is that?" she asked. **It's a modulator** , Birdy explained. _Um, Birdy? She can't really hear you from inside my head,_ Daria reminded her. **Right. Well, activate the modulator** , Birdy told her. _Sure, why not?_

As soon as Daria pushed the shallow button on the modulator, her clothes began to disappear and were replaced by Birdy's uniform. "Hey, what the-" Daria's body was also transformed into Birdy's as well, which still shocked Jane. "Jeez! Is _that_ what that thing does!?" Jane asked her. "And, what's with that outfit?"

"It's my uniform," Birdy said to her. "So... what exactly is that thing on your wrist?" Jane asked her. "It's a modulator. Its purpose is to prevent Daria's clothing being destroyed during a battle, since many of the criminals I tend to fight can be extremely vicious and like to play dirty, if you know what I mean," Birdy explained as she jumped from Jane's bed to stand on the floor.

"Listen, Jane... I know that I'm supposed to let you guys live your daily lives in a normal manner, but my primary mission here is to capture Christella Revy. She's an Alterian scientist who went rogue several years ago, and a lot of people have died because of her. Some of those people were very close to me. Some of them were fellow Federation officers, and others were innocent bystanders in the wrong place at the wrong time," Birdy explained.

Jane slowly nodded her head. "I need your help. Not just you alone, but Daria's as well. I need both of you to help me. If Christella Revy is performing experiments here on Earth, then the lives of the people around you will become very complicated soon," Birdy continued. "I don't want to see anyone else suffer because of her. She's very dangerous, and so are her allies. If I'm right, then most of them have either already made their way to Earth or are doing so as we speak."

"Um... just to clear up a few things," Jane began, "If you're chasing after this Revy woman, then who was that guy you fought earlier?" "That was Giga. He was one of Revy's associates. Very dangerous and aggressive, but he's incapable of sticking to a plan if there's no immediate pay off," Birdy explained as she walked over to look at some of Jane's paintings.

"Are there... any other aliens that we should know about?" Jane asked her. "Well, I already told you that Revy is an Alteran like me, but the only one who would present an immediate threat if they were to show up would be Bacillus. He's extremely dangerous, and he has an insatiable hunger, since he jumps from body to body. He's almost parasitic, devouring a person's body and using it as his own until it deteriorates, and then he jumps to another one," Birdy explained.

"Don't ever let yourself get caught alone by him. Ever," Birdy added. "I've lost three comrades to that monster, and those were when he _wasn't_ working with Revy. There is also one other criminal we should be aware of, but I'm not entirely sure that you would think of him as an alien per se. He's technically human, although he's had cybernetic implants and body parts as a result of his criminal lifestyle," Birdy explained.

"His name is Kerberos, although he prefers to go by the alias of the Red-Eyed Shadow. He's an assassin who strikes from the dark and at a distance, although he _is_ capable of fighting up close if he feels like it." "So... you've met him before?" Jane asked. "Three times, actually. He has a bit of a grudge against me. Then again, so do most of the criminals I've tracked down," Birdy said with a smirk on her face. "I have a habit of punching him in the face," she explained, grinning. "I've broken Kerberos's nose three times; once each time that I've fought him," Birdy said.

"Ouch," Jane said empathetically. "Eh," Birdy said, shrugging her shoulders, "It's part of the job." Just then, Jane's brother, Trent, appeared in the doorway. "Hey Janey, hey Dar-woah!" Trent said in confusion. "Hi, I'm Birdy Cephon," Birdy said with a smile. "Uh... right. Hey, Janey, I've got practice tonight, so the band's gonna be in the basement for a while. Just thought I'd let you know," Trent said before he turned around.

Line Break

At Lawndale International airport, two females made their way out of the plane. The older of the two, Christella Revy, had short black hair and was wearing sunglasses and a sharp business suit. The younger of the two had short black hair and a yellow rain jacket. At first glance, the girl appeared to be completely human, but to anyone who would stop and take a closer look, they would see that the girl was almost... doll-like.

Revy caressed the girl's hair as she saw a blond man with a mustache approach her. "Gomez," Revy said. "Miss Revy," Gomez said with a curt nod of his head. "Where's Giga?" Revy asked him. "He made a tactical error," Gomez said quietly, but just loud enough for Revy to hear him.

"Oh," she said, amused, "Did he now?" "Yes. Officer Birdy Cephon is on Earth," Gomez replied. "Hn, that's not surprising," Revy said coolly. "Ma'am, her presence could present a very real interference with our plans," Gomez said.

"Unlikely. Now, are there any other Federation officers on Earth?" Revy asked him. "There are currently none that I am aware of yet," Gomez replied succinctly. "Have any more of our associates arrived yet?" Revy asked him coolly. "Kerberos will be arriving in Lawndale by tomorrow night, and Bacillus is on his way," Gomez replied.

"Very well. Birdy is out-gunned, out-numbered, and out-matched. As long as we tread carefully, we will emerge victorious when the final showdown inevitably begins," Revy said with a small smile. "Now, what about our resident scientist, Hikawa?" Revy asked him as they made their way through the airport. "He says that everything should probably be ready in two months," Gomez told her.

"Probably?" Revy asked him. "Probably doesn't cut it," she stated. "Have you asked him anything else about his progress?" she asked Gomez. "He doesn't tell me anything except what he knows _you_ want me to ask him. Otherwise, he says nothing," Gomez explained to her. "Oh. He's getting a bit too confident, isn't he? Well, just make sure that he doesn't rush into his experiments. A major setback would be quite inconvenient for him, wouldn't it?" Revy asked with a smile.

"Of course," Gomez replied. "Now, are there any other associates heading our way?" Revy asked Gomez as they left the airport and prepared to enter a car. "Puppet Master is already waiting at the compound with Hikawa. Aside from her, Bacillus and Kerberos, no one else has been able to make it onto the planet yet," Gomez stated. "Not even Bogaros?" Revy asked him. "No. He's busy on another assignment. He hasn't finished yet, so he can't even _begin_ to make his way to Earth," Gomez replied.

"It's a good thing that this is a backwater planet, or else the Federation would actually extend its presence here. Then we'd actually be in trouble," Revy said. "You don't think that Birdy Cephon could pose a problem to us?" Gomez asked her as he drove them away from the airport. "As I said earlier: she's out-numbered, out-gunned, and out-matched. She's already lost; she just doesn't know it yet," Revy said with a grin.

Line Break

"Backwater? You mean Earth is just...insignificant?" Jane asked Birdy. "Yup. We know of this planet's existence, but otherwise the Federation really doesn't bother with it, aside from the occasional information scout to determine the planet's technological achievements," Birdy replied.

"Well, that's kind of depressing," Jane muttered as she sat on the edge of her bed. "Don't feel too bad," Birdy said. "A lot of planets in the Federation start out this way." "But... the fact that you guys think of this as a backwater planet means that you're probably on your own here, doesn't it?" Jane asked her.

"Yes. Yes, it does," Birdy admitted. _Well, that makes sense. No wonder the bad guys can congregate so easily out here. No one gives a damn,_ Daria thought from in Birdy's mind. Birdy sighed. "No, Daria, it isn't that no one gives a damn, it's that Revy tends to stay around high-profile locations, so coming here is actually out of the ordinary for her," Birdy explained.

Jane raised an eyebrow. "What?" Birdy asked her.

Line Break

On the outskirts of Lawndale, a stray dog wandered around a vacant lot with construction equipment and vehicles scattered around, sniffing the ground until it came across a strange man wearing an odd outfit. He had a disturbing leer on his face, and his eyes were yellow. The dog took one sniff and began to growl at him as he held his right hand out. "Come here. I'm just a little hungry," the man said quietly.

The dog continued to growl at him and he knelt down. "Come here," the man said again, holding his arm out further, and further, and further as it began to stretch and move forward at lightning speed towards the dog. The animal yelped as Bacillus caught it and began feeding.

Line Break

Daria walked through the front door of her home and made her way upstairs. She quickly plopped herself down on her bed. She tried falling asleep, until she remembered O'Neill's homework assignment, along with her other assignments in school. "Dammit," she muttered as she got herself out of bed.

"Just because I'm sharing a body with an alien is no reason to slack off... or is it? No, no it isn't," she said tiredly as she began working on her assignments.

An hour later, her door opened and Helen stepped inside the room. "Daria, I've tried calling you down for dinner several times now. You can finish your homework afterwards, okay?" Helen said. Daria stopped typing and sighed. "Fine," Daria said as she reluctantly got up from her chair.

Dinner was the standard frozen lasagna. **You eat this every night? I mean, it tastes good, but I can see how you'd want something different,** Birdy commented. _You've never eaten lasagna before? Oh, right, alien from space. I_ _ **almost**_ _forgot,_ Daria thought sarcastically.

"So, how was your day, Quinn?" Helen asked the red-head. As Quinn began yammering about some kind of fashion club activity and the clothing that some guy was wearing, Helen soon tried to change the subject of conversation. "That's nice, dear. Daria, how was _your_ day?"

Line Break

"You're a real glutton, you know that?" Baccilus turned his heads to see a man wearing a leather jacket, blue jeans, gloves and tinted glasses. He also had unruly navy-blue hair that came down to his shoulders. He was carrying a large suitcase.

"Kerberos," Bacillus said. "Red-Eyed Shadow," Kerberos corrected. "I don't really care, and besides, I've been very hungry," Bacillus said. Kerberos watched as two other dogs were slowly and painfully absorbed into Bacillus's body. Kerberos winced at the sight.

"Care to join them?" Bacillus asked him. "Do that, and I'll be the last meal you ever eat, Bacillus. Remember, I carry heavy-duty weapons at all times," Kerberos replied with a disgusted frown. "Hehe, luck's on your side then. I'm full." "Good."

Line Break

Later, as Daria was finishing her homework, she sniffed something. "That'd better not be Dad trying to cook something," Daria muttered as she walked downstairs. _There's no one in the kitchen,_ she noted. **Open that back door. There's something familiar about this scent,** Birdy requested.

"Sure," Daria said flatly. Her nose scrunched. **Damn. I recognize this stench. Baccilus is somewhere around here. You remember what I told you and Jane about him, right?** "Most of it," Daria said. **Then let's go,** Birdy announced as Daria transformed and leapt out the door. At the moment, Quinn had come down the stairs and had seen Birdy leap out the door.

"Mom! Someone tried breaking into the house!" Quinn shouted, having only seen Birdy after the transformation had occurred. " _What!?_ " Jake asked from upstairs.

Meanwhile, Birdy was busy jumping from rooftop to rooftop as she made her way to the outskirts of town. Finally, she arrived at a vacant lot, where the smell of death was at its strongest. She knelt down at the ground and brought some of it up to her nose. "It's definitely Bacillus," she muttered. _Do you think he's still in the area?_ Daria asked her. "It's possible," Birdy replied as she stood up.

She didn't notice the red dot on her back, until she heard the click of a gun. She quickly leapt out of the way as Kerberos fired at her.

"Birdy... I missed you," Kerberos said with a false smile as Birdy turned around to face him. "Aw, I wish I could say the same," Birdy replied with a smirk as she crossed her arms. "I really missed breaking your nose," she said with a grin. "Yeah, I bet you did!" Kerberos spat as he fired his gun at her.

Birdy leaped and dodged each round as it was sent towards her. "Come on, stay still and let me hit ya'!" Kerberos shouted with a laugh. When he ran out of ammunition for his gun, he retreated behind a stack of pipes and began to reload. "Come on, Kerberos, where's Bacillus!? I know he's around here somewhere!" Birdy called out.

"He ran off after eating. I don't know where he is now, and I honestly don't care, as long as he stays away from me!" Kerberos replied as he finished reloading his gun. He would have to stick with standard firearms until he could reach Revy's lab and grab some of the newer weapons she'd promised to let him test out.

"Figures," Birdy muttered, "Always saving your own skin." Kerberos waited a few seconds before he bolted out from behind his cover and aimed for where he had last seen Birdy. "Huh?" he whispered before he looked up and saw Birdy's foot heading for his face. He dropped his gun and reached up, catching her foot with one hand, grabbing her calf with the other, and swinging Birdy around, using her momentum to his advantage as he threw her into the side of a fork-lift.

Birdy quickly recovered just as Kerberos launched an attack of his own, kicking her in the face and sending her into the cabin of the vehicle. She fell out over the side and ducked as Kerberos flew out and landed on his feet across from her, turning around and striking at her, only to be blocked.

Birdy struck out and kicked Kerberos in the stomach, sending him stumbling back. He managed to dodge her next attack, rolling onto the ground and spinning his legs to kick her feet out from under her, sending her falling down as he jumped up. Birdy followed suit, leaping away as he grabbed a metal pipe and slammed it down where she had been laying just seconds earlier.

Birdy waited for him to swing the pipe at her again before grabbing it and pushing it down as she shifted her weight and slanted herself to the side of the pipe's length, kicking Kerberos in the torso and causing him to let go of the pipe as he stumbled back. He caught his breath and rushed forward, sending a fist at Birdy, who caught it and launched a fist of her own at his face. He turned his head just in time so that the fist collided wither his cheek instead of his nose.

Quickly surprising her, Kerberos kicked Birdy between the legs. "Nothing on the outside, but it's still sensitive," Kerberos snickered. "Cheap shot... bastard," Birdy panted out as she stepped back in pain. "I guess men and women aren't so different after all," Kerberos said with a wry smile. "But enough of that. You're going to die here, Birdy," Kerberos said as he calmly walked forward.

"Did Revy put a hit on me for you?" Birdy asked him. "No. This is personal, but I wouldn't have objected to being paid for it either," Kerberos replied as he pulled a fist back and then slammed it into Birdy's stomach, causing her to double over. He grabbed her by the face and lifted her up to meet his eyes.

"Now," he said, "I think I should pay you back for my nose." He then slammed his head forward, crashing it into Birdy's nose and face. Birdy stumbled back in pain before crashing into the ground. "That felt _really, really good!_ " Kerberos exhaled with a smile plastered on his face.

Birdy, nose bleeding, looked up and smirked at Kerberos. "I'm sure it did," she said with a chuckle. Kerberos paused and raised an eyebrow in confusion. She quickly rolled over and shot up into the air. Kerberos watched as she landed on the top of a bulldozer. "Real nimble, as always," Kerberos commented.

"What's wrong?" Birdy asked him with a smirk on her face. "Nothing," Keberos replied as he pulled a pistol out of his waistband and fired at Birdy. "Shit!" she cried as she tumbled down over the side of the bulldozer. "How did she _not_ see that one coming?" he asked himself as he walked over to the other side of the vehicle.

"Surprise!" Birdy shouted with glee as she punched him in the nose before grabbing his jacket and pulling it over his head. She then kicked him in the stomach and sent him falling back to the ground. Birdy grabbed his gun from the ground and took it apart before hearing a small explosion. She turned her head to see a cloud of smoke expanding from where Kerberos had been lying.

She coughed as the smoke expanded over her before jumping back onto the top of the bulldozer. "Damn. He's gotten away," she muttered as she scanned the lot for any sign of Kerberos's presence. She sighed before leaping away from the lot, heading back to Daria's house. _He won't try to follow us, will he?_ **No, he's too busy trying to escape to pursue us at the moment** , Birdy replied.

Meanwhile, underneath the bulldozer itself, and between the treads, Kerberos exhaled and rested his head back against the ground. "She's gotten better," he grumbled to himself.

When Birdy returned to the house, she transformed back into Daria before trying to enter the back door. "Um, can someone let me in?" Daria asked. Helen unlocked the backdoor and looked at her daughter. "Daria, why are you outside at this time of night? Don't you know that someone tried to break into the house!?"

"You mean, Quinn saw me walking outside and thought that I was somebody else?" Daria retorted with her arms crossed and one eyebrow raised. "Oh," Helen said, embarrassed. "Mom, is it the burglar?" Quinn asked as she came down the stairs. "Yes, Quinn. I'm the burglar," Daria replied sarcastically.

"But, I saw a girl with two hair colors!" Quinn exclaimed. "Quinn, you know that when light hits only one side of your body, the other side looks darker, right?" Daria asked her smugly. "But... I was sure it was someone else," Quinn muttered. "Now, if I could, I would like to go back upstairs. I've been locked out of the house for a while and I'd like to go back to my room, or perhaps the bathroom, if possible," Daria asked as she stepped inside the house.

 **You know... they'll find out the truth eventually. One way or another,** Birdy warned Daria as she walked up the stairs. "I know, but I just want things to be normal for a little while longer," Daria whispered as she made her way into the bathroom. She closed the door and looked at her face.

"This is me, and at the same time... it isn't me," Daria said to her reflection. **We are two hearts in one body** , Birdy said. "Well, at least it isn't permanent," Daria said before she began brushing her teeth.

Listening in from outside the door, Quinn could have swore that she heard her sister talking to herself. _Daria wasn't home until midnight last night_ _ **and**_ _she's been acting strange all day. The thing with being outside tonight is just making things weirder. Just what is going on?_

"Maybe... no. No way. Daria would _never_ get involved in those terroritis people who blow things up and stuff," Quinn whispered to herself. "At least... I _hope_ she wouldn't," she added as she carefully made her way back to her bedroom.

Line Break

The next morning, on their way to school, Daria and Jane both looked at each other with expressions of uncertainty etched on their faces. "So, um, anything interesting happen last night?" Jane asked Daria. "Well, I had the most bizarre dream ever involving aliens and abandoned construction sites," Daria replied in her usual tone. "Um... did any of these aliens look like insects wearing robes?" Jane asked her. "Now that you mention it... yes." Daria then stopped walking and looked at Jane with a worried expression on her face.

"So, that means... it was all real, wasn't it?" Daria asked Jane with a hint of concern in her voice. "I'm sorry, Daria. I was hoping that it was a dream too, but it isn't," Jane said in an apologetic tone. "So... I'm sharing a body with an alien police officer. Can it get any weirder?" Daria asked her.

"Um... you could wear a cowboy hat every time you transform back from the alien," Jane suggested. "No, that would be too down to Earth," Daria replied. Jane snickered.

"Well, at least only the two of us know about this. Although, I think Quinn might be starting to suspect something. Last night, after I came back from fighting Kerberos, Quinn said that she saw a girl with two hair colors leaving the house," Daria said.

"I'm sorry, um, could you rewind a bit?" Jane asked her. "Back to..." "The part about the cyborg assassin, Kerberos?" Jane specified. "Remember, Birdy said-wow, that is a _strange_ name, now that I think about it. Anyway, Birdy said that this Kerberos guy is a cyborg assassin right? I mean not in those exact words, but that was the gist of it," Jane said.

"Yeah, she did," Daria replied as the high school soon came into view. "So, did you beat him and send him into one of those blue orb things that Birdy sent the last bad guy away in?" Jane asked her. "No. He had some kind of smoke grenade on him, so he was able to get away after Birdy punched him in the nose," Daria explained.

"Why did Birdy go out looking for him anyway?" Jane asked her. "Well, she was actually looking for someone else. Bacillus," Daria explained. "Bacillus... you mean that guy she said eats people and walks around in their bodies for a while?" Jane asked her. "Yeah, that's the one. Just like that Edgar bug from Men In Black," Daria replied.

"Did you fight _him_ too?" Jane asked her. "No. According to Kerberos, he'd already fled the area after eating," Daria replied. "So, how did you know where to look for him?" Jane asked her. "Birdy could smell him, apparently. I guess not all of my this body completely like the old one, if my eyes are any indication," Daria explained.

Line Break

Christella Revy looked up from her computer at the man who had just entered the door of her office. "Kerberos," she said with a wry smile, "I didn't expect you until later tonight."

"I arrived early yesterday," he replied after sitting down in front of her desk without any invitation. "So, you look a bit... disheveled, so to speak," Revy commented as she resumed her work. "I met up with Bacillus last night," he said as he leaned back in the chair. "Oh, did you now?" Revy asked him.

"He'd already fed himself, so I didn't have much to worry about. Of course, _she_ showed up a little bit later," Kerberos said with an annoyed sigh. Revy stopped typing as she looked over at Kerberos. "I assume you are referring to Officer Cephon?" Revy asked him. Kerberos snorted.

"Who else would I be referring to?" he asked her. "Maybe an old flame who tracked you down?" Revy asked him. "Fat chance. I don't let sparks turn into flames. You know that," Kerberos retorted as he stared at the ceiling of the room. "So I do," Revy said before she returned to her typing.

"So... when do I get to see your latest toys?" Kerberos asked her. "Later. Right now, I have some important formulas to finish. After that, you will be joining everyone else for a small conference. There, I will explain everything and the roles you all shall play, as well as the reward for your services," Revy replied.

"If you're going to pay me to kill Birdy, just hand over the money and the guns now," Kerberos said as he sat up. "Not yet. You're being too-she broke your nose again, didn't she?" Revy asked with a smirk. "Laugh it up, Christella. Just remember: Birdy has more reasons to kill _you_ than she does anyone else here, other than Bacillus. She'll just arrest everyone else," Kerberos retorted.

"True, but she won't get the chance," Revy said as she continued typing. "What do you mean?" Kerberos asked her. "I learned last night that Birdy... had an accident. She now shares her body with a human, and as such she is unable to take the same risks that she used to when doing her job," Revy explained.

"So? That just means she'll be more cautious," Kerberos said. "If anything, that'll just make her try to lure us into traps instead of fighting us outright," Kerberos said. "And what about your fight with her last night?" Revy asked him in return. "I had the element of surprise, but my gun didn't work when she was in my sights, so she was able to turn the tables," Kerberos explained in an annoyed tone.

"Hn. Gomez!" Revy called out. Gomez walked forward from the door. "Please escort Kerberos to the designated waiting area, and let him know where the rest rooms are located, will you?" "Of course, Miss Revy," Gomez replied. "This way, please," Gomez said as Kerberos lifted himself out of the chair and followed Gomez out of the room.

"Wait!" Kerberos said as he turned around to look at Revy. "You said that Birdy is sharing her body with a human. What do they look like?" he asked her. "You will be informed at the meeting," Revy replied.

Inside the meeting room, which was really more of a lounge, Kerberos spied a young woman with long black hair, coming and brushing it. "Who are you?" he asked her. "I'm the Puppet Master," she replied. "But you can call me Marionette," she replied. "Right, sure," he said as he looked over and saw a young girl in a yellow outfit. "Don't bother talking to her, she won't reply," Marionette said.

"Okay. Have you seen Bacillus?" he asked her. "Yes, unfortunately. He's been sleeping in one of the containment rooms. Miss Revy will be letting him out when the meeting begins, which should be soon," Marionette replied. "Well, it's a good thing I kept one of my detonators with me," Kerberos said.

Marionette's eyes widened. "Detonators?" "Yep. I'm not taking any risks with that guy in the same room as me," Kerberos replied. "Understandable," Marionette replied as she went back to brushing her hair.

A few minutes later, Gomez, Revy, and a Japanese man named Hikawa entered the room, causing everyone to head over to the conference table.

"So, I take it that everyone is accounted for?" Revy asked. "Aside from Giga, who we all know got caught by Officer Cephon yesterday," Revy clarified. "What about Bogaros?" Marionette asked. "He's preoccupied and won't be available for some time. Now, most of you here are probably more interested in taking care of Officer Cephon than the other details of the project, correct?" Kerberos and Bacillus nodded their heads, while Marionette smiled devilishly.

"Back off guys, Birdy is _mine!_ " Kerberos barked. "She's busted my nose four times now. I really want to return the favor and break her whole body... _permanently_ ," Kerberos added with a grin. "You will be given the first chance to field test our weapons against Officer Cephon, now stop begging like a child," Revy said sharply.

"So... when do we get to see your new toys?" Marionette asked sweetly. "Very soon," Revy replied. "Um, I was told earlier that Birdy was sharing her body with a human for some reason. What does this human look like?" Kerberos asked. "She has dark brunette hair, wears glasses, has a green flack jacket, wears combat boots, a tan or yellow-colored shirt and a black skirt," Gomez said.

"Height?" Kerberos asked. "She's a teenager, but around four or five feet," Gomez replied. "She's a human female, and a teenager. School age, correct?" Kerberos asked him. "Yes," Gomez replied. "That means she must go to one of the schools in the area, but would you say middle school or high school?" Kerberos inquired.

"I would say high school age," Gomez said. He'd started to become accustomed to these terms in the time that he'd been hiding on Earth. "Was her outfit a uniform or a personal style?" Kerberos asked him. "Why does that matter?" Marionette asked. "It helps narrow down the the locations. A uniform would be worn at a specific school, such as an academy or a private institution, while a personal style is something that would most likely be found in a public school," Kerberos explained.

He'd done plenty of research on the way things worked on Earth in the time that he'd been hiding from the Federation, and it had payed off considerably for him and his efforts to blend in. "I would say personal style. Same as the other girl, who wore a red jacket and boots, but different shirt and shorts instead of a skirt," Gomez replied.

"So... which high school does most of the population of Lawndale's youth go to?" Kerberos asked. "The aptly named Lawndale High School," Gomez said. "I see, and what are the school hours for this place?" Kerberos asked. "Are seriously thinking of stalking and eliminating this girl as soon as she exits the building?" Gomez asked him.

"No, not right away. I'm going to find out if a replacement body is being constructed for the human, and then I'll find out how long we have to wait. But, if that isn't the case, then I'll send flowers to the girl's funeral," Kerberos replied with a smile.

"It would preferably be within our best interest to avoid attracting unwanted attention by killing civilians," Gomez stated. "True, but in this case it may not be possible to avoid it," Kerberos said with a shrug.

Line Break

On the way home from school, Daria and Jane stopped at Pizza King. "So, exactly how do we fight against these people and live normal lives?" Jane asked Daria between bites of pizza. "I wish I knew," Daria replied. **This... pizza thing. I like it. It's very similar to something that's served in low end restaurants on various planets within the Federation** , Birdy said.

"They serve pizza in the Federation?" Daria asked between bites. **Well, that isn't the word we use, but something similar, only the crust is much thicker, and it's served after it's had time to cool down.** "Um, Daria, do you know that you said that out loud?" Jane asked her. "Huh? I did?" Daria asked her in return. Jane nodded her head.

"Oops," Daria said. A few minutes later, the girls paid for their food and left, neither of them noticing the man following them out of the restaurant. He had a baseball cap and a leather jacket, with blue jeans. He also had a suitcase in his left hand, and tinted glasses.

As soon as they were far enough away from Pizza King, the girls made their way to the junk yard. "Why are we going back here again?" Jane asked. "Birdy wants to get something to help us communicate with each other," Daria replied. "You mean, like a cell phone?" Jane asked with raised eyebrows as she took her own cell phone out of her pocket.

"Um, possibly. She only says that it will help us communicate," Daria said as they both crawled into the red car that led to the entrance of Birdy's ship. When they arrived inside, Daria transformed into Birdy and walked over to a small cabinet built into the wall near the main console. She pressed her hand into a scanner, waiting for it to accept her bio-signature before it opened. "Here," she said as she tossed a gray head-band at Jane.

Jane caught the head-band and looked at it. "A head-band? How does this help?" Jane asked her. "Press that blue orb on the one end," Birdy said. Jane followed her instructions, watching as a long thin microphone formed out of a bulge from the tip of the head-band. "Whoa," Jane whispered as a ear-phone formed out of the bulge on the other end as well.

"Jeez, what kind of technology is this?" Jane asked Birdy. "Most of our technology is what you might refer to as bio-technology. Much of our technology behaves in an organic or biological manner, although there _are_ some exceptions," Birdy explained to her. "What does the little red orb do?" Jane asked her. "It causes it to retract back into its innocuous form," Birdy replied. "Huh. You know... that _is_ pretty neat," Jane said as she played with the head-band.

Birdy transformed back into Daria and placed the other head-band on her head. "Will the modulator cause this to disappear when we transform?" Daria asked Birdy out loud. **No, it won't. Besides, it's on the top of your head, and the Modulator isn't set up to cover that part of your body when we transform** , Birdy replied.

"Right. So, if I'm wearing a ten-gallon hat, then it'll still be on your head when we transform?" Daria asked her. **Your glasses are still on me when we transform, aren't they?** Birdy asked her. "They... they are?" Daria asked.

 **Yes, but I believe that the problem of them falling off can be solved with some kind of attachment that surrounds the back of your head. Like a small rubber cord or a string of some kind, I suppose** , Birdy replied.

As they made their way back out of the ship and into the junk yard, Daria saw a shadow on the ground. She turned around and looked up to see Kerberos standing on top of a rusted old Pinto, pointing his gun at her and Jane. There were two red glowing dots behind his tinted glasses as he smiled at them. "Hi, Birdy. Miss me?" he asked.

"I'm not Birdy," Daria said. "No, but you share her body. Come on, transform now, and finish what we started last night. If you don't," Kerberos said as he aimed his gun at Jane, "I'll just have to give you _incentive_." "Fine," Daria growled as she transformed into Birdy.

"Good girl," Kerberos said as he trained his gun back to Birdy, just as she leapt up and punched him in the stomach. She grabbed his gun and threw it at the ground before spinning around and kicking him in the torso, sending him falling to the ground. Birdy knelt down on the Pinto as she looked at Kerberos slowly getting back up.

"Jane, find a place to hide," Birdy said. "But-" "Just do it, _now!_ " Birdy exclaimed as Kerberos grabbed his gun and opened fire at her. Birdy ducked back as a hail of bullets hit the car. Kerberos looked over to where Jane had been standing as she ran over past a pile of broken TV's. He scowled before looking back at the Pinto that Birdy had been on.

He quickly pushed himself back up and stalked around the side of the massive car pile, looking for Birdy. "Come out, come out, wherever you are!" Kerberos said as he pressed a button on the gun, activating its plasma option. "Time for some field testing," he muttered. He heard a thud near his right, and turned to open fire, scorching the ground with a super-heated bolt of plasma. He saw only the remnants of a metal-something lying there, burnt and melted.

"Missed me," Birdy said from behind him. "Clever girl," Kerberos muttered before he turned around and fired another shot at her. Birdy dodged the blast and leapt into the air, sending a flying kick at Kerberos. He blocked her foot with his gun and pushed back, causing Birdy to sommersault through the air in order to land on her feet.

She grinned as she landed. "You're getting better," she said before pushing herself forward. Kerberos fired another blast at her. Birdy dodged again, but this time she accidentally slammed into the side of an old car to avoid the blast. "Oof," she muttered as she looked up to see Kerberos aiming his gun at her.

Birdy quickly grabbed the door of the car and ripped it from its hinges before lifting it up as a shield when Kerberos fired at her. She threw the car door at Kerberos after a hole had been blown in the middle of it, with only the tinniest sliver of its middle frame still intact. Kerberos ducked as the car door sailed over his head.

He quickly rolled forward and brought his gun up to bear as he took aim once more and fired a bolt at her. Birdy crossed her arms to produce a small energy shield that blocked dissipated enough of the blast that it merely knocked her back into the car. Kerberos fired another shot, and another as Birdy manged to push the other door open and scrambled down out of the car just as a series of plasma bolts sailed overhead.

Kerberos fired again and this time the gun produced a high-pitched squeal and glowed as it shook in his grasp. "What the-?" he asked as he saw the warning on the gun. "Cooling down!? Dammit!" Kerberos spat as he heard a loud mechanical groan. He looked over and saw Birdy lifting the car over her head.

"Hey, Kerberos! Catch this!" Birdy shouted as she threw the car at him. Kerberos gasped as the car flew forward and slammed into him. Birdy smirked as Kerberos and the car crashed into a pile of junk. Birdy let out a breath and trudged forward. From her hiding spot, Jane looked out with her mouth hanging open. _Damn, she's strong!_

Birdy marched forward and stopped just as the car began to move. Kerberos pushed the vehicle up and then sent it flying at Birdy, who jumped out of the way as Kerberos fell over trying to lunge at her, his glasses falling off his face, revealing two red cybernetic eyes. "Don't you ever give up?" Birdy asked him. "Do _you?_ " he asked her in return as he shot up and swung a metal pipe at her.

Birdy ducked and lept backwards as Kerberos shifted the pipe in his grasp and jabbed it forward. Birdy danced around the metal pipe until she was able to grab it. She tried pulling it back and Kerberos did the same, resulting in a brief tug of war between the two opponents until Kerberos let go and Birdy stumbled back.

Using her brief shock to his advantage, Kerberos lunged forward and punched Birdy in the stomach before kicking her. "Oh!" Birdy rasped as she fell back to the ground. She quickly got up as Kerberos grabbed her and pulled her up before smashing his forehead into her face. "Ah!" Birdy yelped as she stumbled back again, only for Kerberos to grab her and pull her towards him as he decked her in the face.

He kept a firm grip on her as he repeated his assault, until Birdy jabbed two fingers into his eyes. His sensors flashed as he yelped in surprise. This gave Birdy just the window that she needed to grab Kerberos and lift him over her head before throwing him to the ground. "Aarg, dammit!" Kerberos yelled as he blinked several times.

Birdy reached her left hand up to her bloodied face. "Damn," she muttered. She cried out in surprise as Kerberos wrapped his arms around her from behind. "You let your guard down!" he said snidely. Birdy quickly elbowed him in the ribs and grabbed him by his jacket before pulling him forward and throwing him over her head.

She watched as he landed on his back with a grunt of pain before he sluggishly rolled over and tilted his head up to look at her. "Face it, you can't beat me," Birdy said. "Just tell me where Christella Revy is, Kerberos." "She's on this continent," Kerberos said with a smile. "You're a real comedian, Kerberos," Birdy said as she marched toward him.

"That's all your getting out of me, Cephon," Kerberos said as he reached for his pistol, pulling it out of its holster and firing at Birdy, who couldn't dodge fast enough and got hit in the side. "Fuck!" she cried in pain as she fell to the ground. "Well, it looks like _I_ win this time, Birdy. And guess what? You lose... _permanently!_ " Kerberos said as he pointed his pistol at Birdy.

"Good bye and good riddance!" Kerberos spat with a maniacal grin. "Hey!" He turned his head to look to his right and saw Jane swinging a metal pipe at his head. The length of the pipe slammed into his face, breaking his nose. "Aah, dammit! You little bitch!" Kerberos yelled in pain as Jane pulled the pipe back and shifted it in her hands so that she could jab it at his stomach, before moving closer and kicking him in the crotch with her boots.

Kerberos doubled over in pain and fell to the ground, dropping his pistol. "Jane, grab this!" Birdy shouted as she held a small object in her hand. Jane ran over and grabbed it from her. "Place it on him, hurry!" Birdy ordered her. Jane nodded her head and rushed over to Kerberos, smacking the small blue object onto his jacket before backing away.

Birdy reached up into her hair and pulled out her triangular remote, aiming it at Kerberos before activating the cell-sphere. The blue light surrounded Kerberos before solidifying and floating away into the sky, eventually disappearing from sight.

Jane looked back over at Birdy and stood up, holding her left hand out. Birdy took it and tried to stand. Jane reached her right hand and Birdy's back to help pull her up. "Come on, Birdy," Jane said. Jane brought Birdy's left arm around her shoulders and placed her own right arm around Birdy's shoulders.

"We need to get back to my ship. There's a healing tank in there," Birdy said. "A what?" Jane asked her. "It's like a large cylindrical bath-tub filled with nutrients and tiny nano-machines to help repair damaged tissue. I'll need to rest in there until I've healed this wound," Birdy said as Jane looked down at the blood staining Birdy's uniform. "Can't you just transform back into Daria and be good as new again?" Jane asked her.

"That might work for a mere surface wound, such as a scratch or a very shallow cut, but not with a wound such as this one," Birdy explained as they carefully made their way around the pile of cars. "Care to explain just how?" Jane asked Birdy as they approached the red car that hid the entrance of Birdy's ship.

"Look, if I transform and let Daria back in control, then the wound-look, it just isn't a good idea, okay? I don't want to risk the wound transferring over to her or worsening during the transformation. I might be able to survive, even without a nutrient tank, but Daria's merely human. The shock alone could kill her," Birdy said.

 _Well, I dont' feel anything yet,_ Daria replied mentally. **Good! Let's hope it stays that way until I'm healed. It's the safest solution right now** , Birdy replied. As Jane helped Birdy inside of the car and into the small airlock of her ship, she saw Birdy wince as she crawled out and stretched while stepping down into the ship's main room. Jane returned to Birdy's side as the Alterian made her way over to a round, partially cylindrical column in one corner of the ship.

After accessing a small keypad on the control panel, the wall split apart in an almost-liquid fashion, revealing a glass surface, which slid back into the wall. Jane blinked in surprise at this while Birdy stepped inside.

"Oh, Jane," Birdy said as she looked over at her. "Thank you... for earlier," Birdy said with a smile. "Well, if you die, then Daria dies. I couldn't let that happen," Jane said in reply. "I know. But... also, the next time that you do something like that... try to be more discrete. When you yelled at Kerberos, it alerted him to your presence," Birdy said.

"That was kind of the point," Jane replied. "Yes, but if you hadn't timed your attack just right, he would have killed you. In fact, had he not been tired from our fight, he _would_ have recovered quickly enough to catch your attack and kill you. Kerberos is a trained assassin. You only had the upper hand because he was worn out from fighting, and if you hadn't managed to pull off your other two strikes and disarmed him, neither of us would be alive right now," Birdy explained.

"Your courage is admirable, and your actions were very noble. I'm just asking that the next time your have the element of surprise, well, don't ruin it by shouting. I know it can seem like the right thing to do, or the cool thing, but that can get you killed if you aren't careful. Do you understand?" Birdy asked her. Jane nodded her head solemnly.

"Okay," Birdy said softly. "But Jane, I _am_ grateful for your assistance. Without your help, Daria and I _would have died_ ," Birdy said as she began to undress. She threw her uniform out of the cubicle and onto the floor before pressing a button and closing the glass door. She tapped a spot on the wall, which opened in an organic manner to reveal a strange, almost-gelatinous keypad. Birdy punched a few keys to set the strength and duration of the nutrient bath, and then the keypad disappeared as the wall absorbed it before solidifying.

Jane watched this in fascination, and then she saw the cubicle begin to fill up with a blueish-green liquid. Eventually, the entire cubicle was filled with the liquid, and Birdy closed her eyes and opened her mouth. She breathed the liquid slowly and calmly. Jane watched for a little while before sitting down on the floor.

She sighed loudly before she rested her head against the wall. "What a day," she said to herself.

Line Break

"So, it seems that Kerberos has been defeated," Christella Revy said as she looked outside the large glass windows of her office in the business district of Lawndale. "It would seem so," Gomez said. "Eh, I never expected him to beat her anyway," Revy said with a shrug.

"No?" Gomez asked her in mild surprise. "Well, I _did_ have my hopes, but they weren't too high, fortunately," Revy replied with a chuckle. "After all, I was really only using him to field test my latest guns. He can be replaced."

"Yes. But we don't know if Officer Cephon was killed or not," Gomez said. "True, but if she _is_ still alive, then that means we have something to test some more of our latest toys on, won't we?" Revy suggested with a devilish smile as she turned to face Gomez.

"I suppose, if that's how you wish to view the situation," Gomez replied. "It is... for now, anyway," Revy replied as she turned back to look outside. "Our reunion has only been postponed, Birdy Cephon," Revy said quietly with a wicked smile. "We'll meet again soon enough, and when we do... it'll be the last."

Ending Line Break

Ending Theme: The Touch, by Stan Bush.


	3. Episode 1-03: Double Trouble

DARIA THE MIGHTY

Birdy The Mighty is property of Studio Madhouse.

Daria and Beavis and Butthead are property of Glenn Eichler, Mike Judge and MTV.

Episode 03: Double Trouble

* * *

It had been nearly two weeks since Kerberos had been defeated by Officer Cephon, and Bacillus was growing restless. He was also hungry. As he strolled down the streets of Lawndale, staying near the locations with alleyways and near the wooded areas, he eventually found himself staring down at a young child wandering alone outside of a store as the evening sun began to set.

The kid had blond hair and looked to be in elementary school. He had a wicked smile on his face, displaying a set of braces, as he taunted a small cat with a stick. The little boy chuckled at the cat's terror, before the cat hissed at him, slowly backing away.

The little boy grinned even wider as he stood up and prepared to walked forward to capture the cat in the alleyway near the store that his father and sister had gone inside of, until he saw the shadow that wasn't his. He raised an eyebrow in confusion before he turned around and saw the strange-looking man with yellow eyes staring at him in a disturbing fashion.

"What do _you_ want?" the boys asked. Bacillus smiled and licked his lips as he stepped forward, causing the young boy to step back in a hesitant manner. Bacillus continued to silently press forward until both he and the boy were far into the alley. "I want... food," Bacillus said with a grin. "Well, I don't have any," the boy said in a rough tone that was clearly an attempt to hide his fear.

"Don't worry, you'll do just fine," Bacillus said before he shot his arms forward, stretching them out at lightning speed. The small cat cried in fear as it ran away, pausing only once to turn around and watch the horrifying scene in the alley. It quickly scampered off.

Thirty minutes later, Brittany Taylor and her father, Steve Taylor, walked out of the store with their purchases. "Dad, Brian left the car door open... _again_ ," Brittany said as she went over to close the door. Her brother usually opened the door to keep air flowing whenever he stayed in the car.

When Brittany went to close the door, she saw that her brother was not in the back seat, nor was he in any of the front ones. He wasn't anywhere around the car. "Brian? Brian!?" Brittany called out as she dropped her shopping bags on the ground. "Brian!?" her father called out as well. Both Taylors continued calling for Brian until Steve took out his cell phone and called the police.

Brittany was gripped with fear for her brother as she looked over at an alleyway. She peeked inside quickly before backing away, only to slowly poke her head back over and stare at the small objects on the ground near the corner of the alley. Brittany stepped forward slowly, cautiously, as her fear increased with each step. The tears were ready to fall as the two objects became recognizable as her brother's shoes, one of which had small splotches of strange goop on it.

Brittany began to whimper as the reality of her find set in. When her father called out for her and didn't receive a response, he eventually came rushing into the alley, where he found her sobbing. "Brittany, don't worry. The police will..." Steve trailed off as his daughter pointed a finger at the shoes. He followed her finger and saw them. He stared at the shoes and recognized them as belonging to his son. He grabbed his daughter and quickly pulled her back out of the alley. They both waited by the car for the police to arrive.

Line Break

Daria Morgendorffer opened her eyes as the alarm clock went off in her bedroom. She lazily reached over to shut it off before climbing out of bed and heading for the bathroom to get ready for the day. _You're lucky, you know that?_ **Huh? What makes you say that?** "You get to sleep in while I have to be awake and at school," Daria replied out-loud as she prepared to brush her teeth.

 **What? Do you want** _ **me**_ **to control your body for you at school so that your mind can basically sleep or something? Talk about Lazy** , Birdy thought at her. "Well, technically, I didn't ask you to do that, but if you're willing to see how school life feels, then feel free to do that," Daria replied after gargling and spitting into the sink.

 **You teenagers and your laziness** , Birdy quipped.

At breakfast, Jake was busy with a large pot. "Hey, kiddo! Guess you're wondering what old dad is doing with the big stew pot." **Trying to kill his entire family with food poisoning, I assume** , Birdy suggested, causing Daria to almost chuckle. "Guess again," Daria replied after recovering.

"Well, in the middle of the night, I woke up with a real hankering, ya know? And then, I remembered the old kitchen sink stew that they used to serve us at the military academy," Jake explained. "Do you know why they called it that?" Jake asked her. "Because they put in everything but the kitchen sink?" Daria asked.

"Because they put in everything but the kitchen sink!" Jake said in agreement. "Now, let's see... soup stock, peppercorns, oregano, chillies..." Jake said as he lifted a spoon of the stew up to his lips to taste it. "Aack! Oh god! My tongue!" Jake screamed as he staggered out of the kitchen.

Meanwhile, Daria had resumed her attempt to read a book, " _On Moral Fiction_ " by John Gardner, for her class assignment from Mr. O'Neill. "Daria, what is your father doing?" Helen asked as she entered the kitchen, already wearing her business suit. "Don't ask," Daria replied.

It was then that Helen noticed the book in Daria's hands. "Reading something?" Helen asked her. "Actually, I'm watching a hologram of the news," Daria replied sarcastically, causing Helen to frown. Daria sighed. "I'm reading a book. For school. It's about how fiction should do more than just entertain people," Daria explained.

"That sounds interesting," Helen commented. "Yeah, a writer writing a book about how other writers should write books. It must have been a huge bestseller," Daria said sardonically. They both heard Jake screaming from the living room.

"So, anything else happen in school this week?" Helen asked Daria. "Well, nobody talked to me this week, other than Jane, and I wasn't invited to any parties for the weekend, so I'd say it's been an average and ordinary week so far," Daria replied.

"Helen, what's the number for nine-one-one!?" Jake cried out in agony from the living room. **Jake, do you know what a stupid question sounds like!?** Daria had to bite down on her tongue to keep from laughing.

"Daria, do you have to look at everything in a negative light?" Helen asked with a weary sigh. "Could you possibly be referring the harsh light of reality?" Daria replied in her usual manner. "Daria..." Helen warned. "What?" she asked. "Helen! My tongue! It's back!" Jake shouted with joy and relief. "Be right there, Jake!" Helen said as she walked over to her husband in the living room.

Daria used this as an opportunity to finish reading her assignment before heading off for school.

Line Break

"And so," Mr. O'Neill said, "What Mr. Gardner is telling us is that the writer of fiction has a duty that goes beyond the mere retelling of a story. His or her job is to tell the story in such a way as to leave the reader..." He trailed off waiting for people to raise their hands.

"Yes, Kevin?" he asked warily after noticing Kevin Thompson's hand raised. "Leave the reader screaming for more full-contact martial arts excitement?" Kevin answered. O'Neill shook his head and called on Daria. "I believe Mr. Gardner feels it is the writer's duty to steer the reader towards more conscientious behavior, no matter how dull that makes the story," Daria replied in her usual tone.

Mr. O'Neill sighed. "Very good, Daria. Now, keeping that in mind, I want you each to select a book from the list in front of you for a report on its moral intention. Yes Kevin?"

"People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Yeah, I got one, Yes!" Kevin cheered for himself. Mr. O'Neill sighed and shook his head. "Right, babe? Babe?" Kevin asked when Brittany didn't reply. Brittany was sitting in a slump, with no makeup on and her hair out of its usual pig tails. She wasn't even wearing her cheer-leading uniform, and instead was wearing blue jeans, a white shirt, and a jean jacket.

"Hey, what are you doing in Brittany's seat?" Kevin asked. "Um, hello? Who are you?" Kevin asked. "Kevin, that _is_ Brittany," Daria said. "What? No way!" Kevin replied in complete disbelief. **He's joking, right? He honestly didn't even realize that Brittany wasn't wearing her usual attire until** _ **just now?**_ **How does this boy even remember to** _ **breathe!?**_

 _I believe the answer to_ _ **that**_ _question is beyond our present understanding of science and the universe_ , Daria replied mentally. "Um, Brittany? Are you... feeling okay?" Mr. O'Neill asked her in a hesitant but gentle manner. "Huh?" she asked as she lifted her head up to look at Mr. O'Neill.

"Brittany, have you been paying any attention in class today?" Mr. O'Neill asked her. "No. I was finishing my math homework," she said without her usual high-pitch squeal. Her voice sounded hollow, perhaps even hoarse. "Um, Brittany, while it's good to see that you care about your understanding of mathematics, English class isn't the place to do so," O'Neill said.

"Sure," Brittany said quietly as she put her homework away and then laid her head on the desk with a sigh. "Uh, babe? Why were you, like, doing your math homework anyway? Why not copy from a smart kid?" Kevin asked, oblivious to Mr. O'Neill's widened eyes. "Shut up, Kevin," Brittany mumbled. "Huh? I can't hear ya, Babe," Kevin said. "I said... Shut. Up. _Kevin_ ," Brittany growled louder.

"Um, Brittany," Mr. O'Neill said, "Perhaps you would like to share what is bothering you? If it isn't too much trouble?" "No, that isn't too much trouble. What _is_ too much trouble is apparently being allowed to stay out and help the police look for my little brother!" Brittany yelled. Daria and Jane's eyes widened at Brittany's outburst.

"Oh my," Mr. O'Neill said. "Brittany, I had no idea." "Of course not. No one here knows anything about anything. I don't know if the police have even _issued_ an Amber Alert yet, and considering the staggering _incompetence_ that the police have displayed over the years that I've lived here, I'm shocked that half of them even _know_ how to spell their own names," Brittany snarled.

"Did she just use a word with four syllables?" Jane asked Daria. "Yeah, she did," Daria replied quietly. "Hn, I should have _known_ ," Jane whispered. "Huh?" Daria asked her. "Her whole bimbo act... it's just that: an act. Damn, she should try out for the drama club some time," Jane added.

"Whatever it is that you're saying, perhaps it can wait until I'm no longer in the same room as yourselves?" Brittany asked Jane with a glare. Jane gulped and leaned away from Daria as she looked away from the fuming girl.

"Miss Taylor, please... calm down," Mr. O'Neill asked her. "I'll calm down when the police find my little brother!"

Line Break

"Well damn," Jane said as she ate her lunch, "I didn't think they'd let her stay all day." "Huh?" Daria asked Jane as she turned to look at Brittany Taylor making her way over to the table where Jodie and Mack were sitting. They were close enough that Daria and Jane could make out their conversation. "The only clues were his shoes in the alley, and one of them had a strange goop or something on them. It was bluish green or something," Brittany said.

 **No. Oh no** , Birdy groaned. _What? What's wrong?_ Daria wondered. **Brittany's little brother will never be found** , Birdy said. "How... how do you know?" Daria asked in a whisper. **Bacillus. What Brittany described was the usual remains of an attack by Bacillus.**

 _Which means..._ **Brittany's brother is dead. He's been devoured by Bacillus, and if she goes looking for him... we need to find out where her brother was attacked. We also need to start looking into other disappearances as well. We have to find them and mark them throughout the town. We need to chart out the locations that Bacillus has been stalking, before he strikes again** , Birdy said.

 _What happened to not looking for trouble?_ **Daria, Bacillus is not something that we can hope will go away. He knows that I'm here, and he's a monster. Eventually, if we don't take care of him now, he'll attack someone close to you, such as your sister or Jane. He has to be stopped. I've lost too many friends to him anyway. Too many people have died because of him, and it ends this weekend,** Birdy declared with a tone of finality.

 _How will you arrest him?_ **Arrest him? Who said anything about** _ **arresting**_ **him? I'm going to kill him.** _ **We**_ **are going to kill him, and put an end to his trail of death once and for all** , Birdy replied. _You..._ _ **really**_ _have a grudge against this guy. Even when Kerberos was trying to kill us, you still arrested him and sent him to... wherever that orb took him_ , Daria thought in return.

 **He'll get the equivalent of a life sentence** , Birdy replied. **Besides... he never ate anyone alive and took their form in order to hurt their loved ones.** _So, how do we find out where Brittany's brother was attacked?_ **Simple. We ask her** , Birdy replied.

Line Break

"So... any word from Bacillus?" Christella Revy asked Gomez as she sat in her office chair, typing at her computer. "He says that he's been having... _snacks_ every few days, to keep himself from going on a spree," Gomez replied. "Well, the combat droids are finished, so we can send them out tonight. We can have them...monitor him and prevent him from doing anything that draws _too much_ attention," Revy said.

"Are you sending them out to hunt Officer Cephon as well?" Gomez asked her. "Of course I am. Two combat droids should be enough to handle her, or at least slow her down," Revy replied.

Line Break

"Um, if we know that her brother is dead, then why are we helping Brittany search for him?" Jane asked Daria. "Because... it gives us an excuse to go find Bacillus, and perhaps give Brittany a sense of closure if we do find anything else," Daria replied. "This isn't like you, Daria," Jane noted. "Jane... Brittany's brother was eaten alive by a homicidal maniac. Tell me that doesn't warrant an ass-kicking of some kind," Daria retorted.

"Point taken," Jane said. "Besides, this way, if Brittany runs into Bacillus, we can at least keep her from dying," Daria said. "And anyway, Brittany's never really tried to hurt either of us or said anything mean to us on purpose, so the very least we can do is help her in some form, as much as I am loathe to get involved anyway," Daria said.

Brittany was standing out by the store where her brother had disappeared when Daria and Jane arrived. Jane had a plastic bag in her hands. "What's in the bag?" Brittany asked Jane. "Dish soap. I needed to stock up, but I didn't want to risk forgetting about it before going home tonight," Jane replied.

"That makes sense, I suppose," Brittany said. Brittany stepped over the yellow tape blocking the alley entrance, with Daria and Jane following her. "This way," Brittany said as she moved closer to the site where she had found the shoes. "You said that they had a blue goop of some kind on them, right?" Daria asked her.

"One of them did. The police have the shoes now, but I can still remember what they looked like. I think someone took him. I don't know who, and I've checked the local sex offender registry to see who lives in Lawndale," Brittany said. "And..." Daria asked her.

"The nearest sex offender is in the hospital right now healing from injuries he received during a car accident at the beginning of the week. So that's one person checked off of the list, and the second-nearest offender has been under house arrest for the past three weeks, with every movement carefully monitored by the officers assigned to him. All of the others live on the outskirts of town," Brittany said.

"When I first thought that someone could be doing something like that to Brian, I... I actually threw up in the girl's bathroom at school," Brittany said with a somber tone. "I know that he isn't the nicest kid, and that he's mean to animals, but I've always hoped that he would get better as he grew up," Brittany continued. "But now... I don't know if he'll get the chance to grow up at all," Brittany said, trying to hold back her tears. The trio spent the next two hours searching the downtown area for any clues to Brian's whereabouts, even though Daria and Jane both knew the truth.

It was after the sun had set and they were near the abandoned quarry often called Lover's Lane. Brittany sat down on a bench with a sigh. "Dammit, Brian... where are you?" she whispered quietly. As Daria was about to say something, she began sniffing the air.

 **He's nearby. He's probably feeding too** , Birdy said. Soon, the stench began to grow stronger, and eventually, the three girls heard a strange sound, like something wet trailing across the ground. They all looked over to see something blue and green moving out from behind an alley, before ducking back inside. "What was that?" Jane asked.

"Bacillus," Daria whispered. **Definitely. Wait, stop her!** Daria turned to see Brittany running over to the alley, with Jane following close behind. Daria moved out of sight and quickly transformed into Birdy.

When Jane and Brittany arrived at the alley, their jaws were open. In front of a large blueish green mass of tentacles and slime was Brian Taylor, wearing the same clothes he'd been wearing the previous day. "Brian!" Brittany shouted ecstatically. "Brian" smiled and held his arms out. "Brittany! I was so worried. I knew you'd find me, though!" he called out.

Jane immediately knew that something was off, as she had actually paid attention to the amorphous blob behind the boy. Jane looked carefully and saw that a long segment of the blob was attached to the boy's back. "Wait, Brittany! That's not your brother!" Jane shouted at her as she rushed forward and dragged Brittany away.

"No! Let me go! He's my brother! Let me go!" "Yes, let her go," "Brian" said as a blue tentacle whipped forward and pushed Jane back. Brittany immediately turned to look at Jane and then back at Brian. His smile was too sweet, and his voice was too pleasant. "No... you aren't him," Brittany whispered as a flood of different emotions began to overwhelm her.

"No... but I fooled you long enough!" the fake Brian said with a smile as he began to melt into a blue blob, with his clothes going with him. Brittany stepped back with her hands over her mouth in horror and shock as the sight as the blob began to form long necks and what looked like the heads of dogs. Their mouths snarled and barked and growled with a wicked ferocity.

Bacillus lunged forward, just as a figure in white, blue and tan jumped into alley and grabbed Jane and Brittany, pulling them away. " _ **Cephon!**_ " Bacillus shouted at her as she landed on the other side of the street. "Bacillus," Birdy spat. " **I haven't had an alterian in a while,** " Bacillus said through the dogs' mouths. His entire body was an amorphous blueish green blob with the upper torsos and front limbs of dogs and people sticking out, including Brian Taylor and a face very familiar to Birdy.

" **It's been very long time, in fact,** " the head of Birdy's childhood friend Nataru spoke. "You... you bastard!" Birdy snarled at him. "Jane, what's going on!?" Brittany cried as she watched the scene between the new girl and the blob monster. "That woman is an alien police officer, and that thing is an alien criminal," Jane explained.

"What!?" Brittany asked her in disbelief. "Well, do you have a better explanation for what's happening?" Jane asked her. Brittany closed her mouth and turned back to look at Birdy and Bacillus squaring off against each other, as Bacillus moved out of the alley and entered the street.

"So, I take it that you were hired by Revy," Birdy said. " **Would it matter?** " Bacillus asked in a deep voice, his true voice. " **After I eat you, I'll devour** _ **her**_ **as well,** " Bacillus said. "You always were a glutton," Birdy said with a frown. " **Ha! Kerberos said the same thing when we met up the day before you defeated him,** " Bacillus said to her. "I guess he and I share the same opinion of you," Birdy retorted.

" **Most of my prey do,** " Bacillus replied with a deep chuckle. " **So... do you want to join your old lover slowly or quickly?** " Bacillus asked through Nataru's face. "You bastard, I'll kill you!" Birdy shouted. Bacillus launched his dog heads forward and Birdy punched through them, dodging his other tentacles.

She managed to punch into one mouth, but didn't go through. She quickly pulled her arm out and jumped back, shaking her arm to get the goo off of it. "Damn, I forgot that power techniques don't work on him," she muttered. Bacillus spread his body and and began to surround her, ignoring Jane and Brittany as they backed away from the street. Jane quickly activated her headset, prompting Birdy to do the same.

Birdy quickly leapt up to the top of a street light as Bacillus's body surrounded that portion of the street. Bacillus began moving up the pole. _Birdy, are there any techniques that you have to stop this guy? You said you wanted to kill him, right?_

"Yes, but I left my best weapon against him back at my ship!" Birdy said as she leapt away from the top of the pole, just as Bacillus reached the top. She landed on the street and turned to face the monster as he came down and began to reform himself.

 _Well, what is it?_ "It's a chemical weapon, combing hydrophyllic and hydrophobic colloids in a molecule," Birdy explained. _Like a surface active agent? Like dish soap!? You mean this guy can be beaten with freaking dish soap of all things!?_ "Um, what's dish soap?" Birdy asked her as she dodged Bacillus's attack.

"Dish soap?" Jane muttered, before she remembered her bag. Unfortunately, it had fallen out of her hands earlier in the alley. She glanced over at the alley and ran for her bag as fast as her legs could carry her. She lifted up the bag and took out the soap, removing the cap and running over to Birdy and Bacillus.

She squirted the dish soap at Bacillus's body. For a few seconds, nothing happened, until smoke began to rise from where he'd been hit and his dog heads snarled and began to dissolve. Soon, Bacillus was retreating into a gutter that fed into the sewer. Birdy turned to look at Jane. "Jane... where did you get that weapon?" Birdy asked her. "Weapon? It's freaking dish soap!" Jane replied.

"Oh," Birdy said as she grabbed the bottle and looked at it curiously. "You don't have dish soap where you're from?" Jane asked her incredulously. "Um... I didn't think that it could be used this way," Birdy replied sheepishly.

"Jane! Where's Daria!?" Brittany asked her with concern. Brittany had noticed that Daria was nowhere to be seen after Bacillus had appeared. "Uh..." Before Jane could answer, she and Birdy both saw two strange figures wearing trench coats walking towards them with powerful strides. "Okay, who are those guys?" Jane asked, causing Brittany to turn around. "Detectives?" Brittany asked rhetorically.

"No," Birdy said, noticing a flashing red light from their sunglasses. "Can we help you?" Brittany asked the two figures. There was no response from either of them. Brittany gulped and began to back away nervously. Jane stood protective in front of Brittany.

"Back off, creeps," she said. "You two need to find someplace safe. These guys are archazoids," Birdy said. "Arca-what?" Brittany asked her. "Robots, basically," Birdy explained. "Why are there monsters and robots roaming the streets!?" Brittany cried.

The two robots moved forward silently. "Jane, take Brittany somewhere safe," Birdy said as she ran over to the railroad tracks. The two robots immediately pursued her with matching speed. "Or, we could just stay here since they decided to follow you," Jane quipped.

As soon as Birdy landed on the rails, she found the two archazoids had landed on her left and right. "So...two against one? I feel sorry for you fellas," Birdy said with a smirk as the archazoids ripped off their fleshy covers and coats, revealing their full metal bodies underneath. "You know, you guys looked a lot better with your clothes _on_ ," Birdy teased. The archazoids poised themselves for attack and then lunged forward.

Archazoid 01 extended its fingers into blades as it rushed forward, only for Birdy to catch it and throw it over her shoulders onto the tracks. Archazoid 02 rushed in a sent its hands forward, trying to hit Birdy as she dodged each attack. She ducked and the spun around, kicking the machine in the torso.

Archazoid 02 quickly recovered and resumed its assault, spinning and kicking at Birdy before she jumped up over its head and landed in the other side. Archazoid 01 had recovered and had joined 02 in staring down their opponent. Birdy brought her fists together and began to crack her knuckles. "Ready, boys?" Birdy asked with a smirk.

Archazoid 01 ran forward and jumped into the air, pulling it's right arm back in preparation for a strike, as Birdy prepared for her own strike. Just as Archazoid 01 came down on top of her, Birdy flew her fist forward, knocking the machine's head off before spinning around to kick it in the torso, breaking its left arm.

Archazoid 02 lunged forward and Birdy jumped out of the way as it performed a spin kick of its own. She leapt to the side and ducked before kicking it out from under its feet, but it quickly hopped back up and jabbed a hand forward, which Birdy dodged before kicking the machine in the face, sending it stumbling back.

She then jumped up as Archazoid 01 rushed forward, landing on its shoulders and jumping off before performing a spinning kick to send it back. Archazoid 02 hooked its arms under her shoulders from behind, and Birdy shift her weight before jumping up, feet into the air. She gripped the arms of Archazoid 02 and ripped them from their sockets, leaving the cords and cables in full view as she landed behind it and lifted the machine into the air, spinning around and throwing it at Archazoid 01.

Both machines crashed away from the tracks and landed near a sewer opening. _Damn, that was... thrilling,_ Daria commented. "Oh yeah. Fighting can do that," Birdy panted with a grin. _Still, we won, right?_ "No. We didn't manage to kill Bacillus, and..." Birdy trailed off as she saw blue sludge creeping out of the sewer opening. It quickly began absorbing itself into the two machines, bringing them together into a large ball.

"Uh-oh," Birdy commented. _Oh hell_ , Daria commented. The ball began to move forward, rolling towards them at a frightening speed. Birdy pulled her fist back and sent it forward, skidding back slightly from the inertia of the ball. She quickly pulled her fist out and leapt away. She started running as the ball unfolded and revealed a multi-limbed robotic creature, with two Archazoid heads and eight limbs for mobility, and the torsos mixed and matched in various places.

" **Run Birdy! Run! Ahahahaha!** " Bacillus shouted with glee as he chased her at a terrifying speed. "He's keeping pace with us!" Birdy shouted she turned her head to see Bacillus gaining ground. "Shit!" she swore as she sped up.

Bacillus shot four of his limbs forward, stretching them out and catching Birdy, pulling her back into his body, "No! Not this way!" Birdy shouted as she was pulled inside of Bacillus's body. " **Time to join Nataru and all the others, Birdy,** " Bacillus said.

 _What do we do!? If we don't do something_ _ **I**_ _will die too!_ **Don't worry, we have about five minutes before his body can actually absorb us or break down our cell structure and combine it with his own** , Birdy assured her.

" **Well, so much for her. Now, where were those two delicious-looking morsels I saw her with earlier?** " Bacillus said before a bright light began to shine from inside of his body. " **Huh?** " Electric sparks began flying before a flash of light erupted from within and Birdy shot forward, crashing to the ground. She coughed as she stood up and turned to face Bacillus. " **I shouldn't have expected anything less from you, Birdy,** " he said in his deep, slightly mechanical voice.

Birdy immediately turned and ran away from him. " **You've got a lot of spirit. This could be** _ **fun!**_ " Bacillus exclaimed as he rushed forward to chase her once again through the streets of Lawndale. Daria began to notice that Birdy's movement had become somewhat slower as they continued running.

 _Birdy, are you all right?_ **No. And if we don't find a way to stop Bacillus soon, then everyone in Lawndale will be in trouble. He isn't like Kerberos or the other criminals I've fought. He has no allegiance to anyone but himself, and he's only working with Revy out of convenience** , Birdy explained.

Eventually, Birdy crashed into Jane. "What the-Jane! I thought I told you-" "Yeah, yeah, I know!" Jane retorted. "Guys!" Brittany said as she pointed at Bacillus charging toward them. "What the hell is that!?" Jane asked. "That's Bacillus! He merged himself with the bodies of those Archazoids! Now move!" Birdy exclaimed as she grabbed Jane and Brittany before jumping up to a roof top.

" **Three for the price of one! It must be my lucky day!** " Bacillus exclaimed as he climbed up the side of the building. Birdy leapt off, still carrying Jane and Brittany, and continued running and jumping before she stopped at an auto-shop. She let the two girls out of her grasp and slumped forward against the side of the building.

"Birdy... are you okay?" Jane asked her with concern. "No. I just had a reunion with the monster who killed the man I loved _and_ I can't find a way to beat him!" "Um, Miss Birdy... that thing out there. Earlier, it took the form of my brother. Does that mean that it... did it... did-" "Yes. Brittany. I'm sorry, but your brother is dead. Nothing will bring him back," Birdy said ruefully.

Brittany slumped down and brought her knees up to her chest. "Damn it. God damn it!" Brittany cried out. "You said the man that you loved. Was that the one guy that popped out of its body earlier?" Jane asked her. "Yes. His name was Nataru, and we were childhood friends. As we got older, we both developed further feeling for each other, especially when we both joined the Federation Police force. We were actually going to get married at some point, but two months before the wedding was supposed to take place, I learned that Bacillus had devoured both Nataru and his partner," Birdy said with tears in her eyes.

"The last time I saw him, he'd taken Nataru's form and used it to taunt me, saying I could still be with him if he were to eat me," Birdy said as she slowly wiped the tears from her eyes. Jane and Brittany both lowered their heads and stared at the ground in sympathy after they listened to Birdy's story.

"Yesterday," Brittany began, "My dad and I were getting fishing supplies from that outdoor supply store after school, and Brian had been dragged along with us. We were planning a fishing trip for this weekend, and Brian decided to wait in the car while Dad and I went inside." "We spent forty-five minutes carefully selecting our bait and gear before leaving the store, only to find that the car doors were opened," Brittany said before pausing to take a breath.

"Brian usually left the doors open to keep the air moving, but we always told him to just roll down the window. When we realized that he wasn't in the car... we panicked and Dad called nine-one-one while I searched around the building and nearby alley for him. That blue goop I found on his shoes... that was residue from that thing, right?" Brittany asked.

"Yes. Usually, a few articles of clothing and goop are all that's left after Bacillus attacks someone," Birdy replied. "So... how do I tell my dad that Brian's dead? How... why did it have to be _him!?_ " Brittany asked as she began to sob. "And where's Daria? Oh god... it ate her too, didn't it? Daria and Brian are both dead!" Brittany cried before sobbing even more.

"Actually... she's not dead," Birdy said. "How do you know?" Brittany asked. Birdy transformed back into Daria. "This is how," Daria said. "W-What the? What the hell is going on!? Seriously, what the fucking hell is going on here!?" Brittany screeched. "It's a long story, but to make it short, Birdy had an accident a few weeks ago and I was mortally wounded. To save my life, she merged my consciousness and mind with her body while a new one is being prepared for me," Daria replied.

"This is pure Kafka," Brittany muttered. "Not to mention grade A bullshit." "Brittany, I know this isn't easy to accept, but-" " **Found you! Ha-ha!** " Bacillus shouted as he moved toward them. "Daria, transform!" Jane said to her. Daria tapped the modulator and transformed into Birdy.

Jane grabbed her soap and prepared to attack, but Bacillus shot an arm forward and pushed her to the ground, knocking the soap out of her hands. He retracted the hand and laughed at the girls. Birdy quickly grabbed a large girder and threw it into Bacillus's torso, sending him stumbling backwards. Sparks cracked and shot out of the spot where the girder was sticking through.

Brittany saw a container of kerosene on the ground. She grabbed it, picked it up and opened the cap to smell it. She glared at Bacillus with narrowed eyes, watching the sparks with interest. "This is for Brian," Brittany growled as she rushed forward and threw the kerosene at Bacillus, covering him with it. As soon as the liquid touched the sparks, Bacillus lit up in flames.

He cried out in agony as Birdy picked up another girder and leapt into the air, throwing it down through Bacillus's body, pinning him to the ground as he burned. Birdy sat on the ground as she transformed back into Daria. "Let's get the hell out of here," she said as she got up and walked over to Jane and Brittany.

As they walked away, Brittany took one last look back at the burning remains of Bacillus before turning her head and resuming her trek home.

Line Break

"And another one bites the dust," Marionette sang as she listened to Gomez finish his report. "So... according to the data collected by the archazoids, that girl's name is Daria, and her friend is named Jane," Revy said with a smirk. "Yes," Gomez said. "Well, all we have to do now is just bide our time while gathering information on these two girls," Revy said.

"Ooh! Spy mission!" Marionette exclaimed. "I volunteer!" she said as she shot up from the couch and raised her hand. Gomez raised an eyebrow but said nothing. "Very well, but no missions until I've given you permission, understood?" Revy asked. "Of course," Marionette said with a smile.

Line Break

Brittany slowly walked through the upstairs hallway of her house before she stopped at the door of Brian's room. She carefully opened the door and stepped inside. She looked around the room and took a deep breath as she picked up a picture from the table next to Brian's bedside. It was a photograph of them when their mother was still living with them, and everyone was smiling.

Brittany slumped down against Brian's bed and began to cry. When her father and Ashley Amber checked in on her, they saw that she hadn't moved from her spot. They assumed that she was asleep, but in truth, Brittany was simply staring out the window at the night sky with a frown on her face.

"I avenged you, Brian," she whispered. "But that won't bring you back."

Ending Line Break

Ending Theme: The Dream Within, performed by Lara Fabian and composed by Elliot Goldenthal, from the soundtrack for Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within (easily the best thing to come out of that movie).


	4. Episode 1-04: Tango and Bash

**DARIA THE MIGHTY**

Birdy The Mighty is property of Studio Madhouse.

Daria and Beavis and Butthead are Property of Glenn Eichler, Mike Judge and MTV.

Episode 04: Tango And Bash

* * *

It was a Sunday night when the police found the body in an empty parking lot. Detective Goldsmith knelt down and peeled back the blanket and whistled. He turned around as he saw Detective Horner walking towards him. Horner looked down and blinked. "What is _this?_ " he asked the older man.

"We got the call two hours ago. A cart pusher discovered the body when he went to collect a cart," Goldsmith replied. "His identity?" Horner asked. "He had his driver's license on him, but according to it, he's only twenty-seven years old," Goldsmith said. "Twenty-seven!? You're kidding!" Horner exclaimed as he looked at the aged body of the man on the ground. He looked ancient, almost mummy-like, with only skin and bones.

"Nope. And this license was renewed last year," Goldsmith said grimly. "Jesus... what the hell happened to this guy?" Horner asked in morbid astonishment.

Line Break

Daria and Jane quietly made their way to school, with Jane occasionally yawning. "So... I take it Mr. O'Neill liked that story you turned in last week," Jane said. Daria nodded her head. "So, when do I get to read it?" she asked her. "That depends... Do you like the idea of marrying Kevin Thompson?" Daria asked with a smirk. "Only if I get to be a widow after the wedding," Jane replied in kind.

"Is that really what you wrote, though?" Jane asked her. "No. It was an idea that I had, but I threw it out," Daria replied. "Hmm, so what _did_ you write about?" Jane asked her. "You'll find out eventually," Daria said. "Really? Are you sure that you won't _conveniently_ forget about it?" Jane asked her.

"Hmm, I can't remember if my memory is good enough," Daria replied facetiously. Jane snorted indignantly with a smile. "Well, I heard that Brittany's been... _coping_ better lately," Jane said carefully. The incident with Bacillus had been traumatizing for Brittany, as well as a sore spot for Birdy and Daria, since Daria had ended up experiencing some of Birdy's memories of her time with Nataru and her previous encounters with Bacillus. Jane was the only one who hadn't really suffered from the fight.

"Really, from who?" Daria asked her. "Jodie. I talked to her last night. Someone gave her my phone number, but I can't imagine who it could've been," Jane said. "That _is_ kind of odd," Daria commented. "So, I have a question for you," Jane said. "Whenever I talk, does Birdy make comments about me in your head? I'm kind of curious, since you told me about what she said in your head the other week," Jane said, being careful not to bring up the part about that being the same day that they had encountered Bacillus.

"Only when you say something stupid," Daria replied. "Yeah? And how often is that?" she asked her. "Sorry, but Birdy has sworn me to secrecy on that one," Daria said with her Mona Lisa smile. "Does she make comments about the other people at school?" Jane asked her.

Daria smirked. "Sometimes, I have to bite my tongue to prevent the laughter," Daria admitted sheepishly. "You're kidding," Jane said. "I'm not. She has a wit to match both of us," Daria said. "Damn. Why couldn't _I_ have been the one to get merged with an alien?" Jane asked.

"Well, you would have to be mortally wounded first," Daria said, briefly looking away. The memory of being accidentally fried by Birdy was still very painful for her. **Hey, your new body will be ready in a few months, so don't feel too bad. And when all of your memories are placed inside, it'll have the same muscle memory as your old body!**

 _Does that mean my eyesight will still suck?_ **Uh... maybe** , Birdy replied in an evasive manner. _Figures,_ Daria grumbled mentally. Jane found it amusing to watch Daria's facial features change whenever she mentally conversed with Birdy. She didn't know if Daria was aware of it, but if she wasn't then Jane was going to keep that information to herself for the time being. If Daria could have her little secrets, then Jane could have one too.

"Oh, by the way, Trent and the others are going to be playing a gig at the Zon tonight. I think the streets should be safe enough for us to go there tonight," Jane said. "Huh?" Daria asked her. Jane merely chuckled before repeating her statement.

Line Break

Gomez watched the video playing on the monitor in front of him. " _Have you ever done this before?_ " asked the voice of Dr. Hikawa. " _No, I've participated in many_ _ **medical experiments**_ _, but-_ " " _Is that right?_ " Hikawa's voice interrupted the young man's.

" _You must have had to_ _ **suffer**_ _at times,_ " Hikawa continued. " _Well, I guess. It was more like... getting a really high fever or, well, getting a really bad rash,_ " the young man replied earnestly. " _That's terrible,_ " Hikawa said. " _Well, not to worry. We maintain very high safety standards,_ " Hikawa added.

Gomez stopped the video and ejected the disc from the player. The video had been recorded the day prior. "Lying sack of shit," he muttered to himself. _Not that I'm any better,_ he mentally added. He pressed a button on his computer and selected live video feed from one of Hikawa's labs. "But, I gotta say... it _is_ quite the setup," he admitted.

Dr. Hikawa turned to look at the camera, somehow knowing that Gomez was watching him, or he had looked at his watch and knew that it was time for his status report. " _Gomez, if the ingredients solidify, then I can make pills. Right now, though, I still have to administer them directly into the blood,_ " Hikawa said over the speakers. Gomez nodded his head in understanding, despite knowing that Hikawa couldn't see him.

" _Let me... introduce you to the subject of my experiments: Mr. Adam Morris,_ " Hikawa said as he held out his hands and pointed at the other side of the room, where safety glass was separating Dr. Hikawa from a man strapped into a chair. The man had dozens of tubes connected to his body, and they were all injecting various substances into it. His eyes were open in a daze. He seemed to be a mix of panicked and calm, but mostly high. His pupils were dilated.

"I hope that you don't fail this time," Gomez said. " _If the sight bothers you, then just remember that Miss Revy_ _ **supports**_ _my research,_ " Hikawa said to the camera, before Gomez cut the feed. He leaned back in his chair and sighed. "Ha! For now," Gomez muttered.

Just then, one of the doors in the room opened slightly and the young doll-girl poked her head inside. Gomez looked at her and raised an eyebrow. "I guess Miss Revy wants to see me now, doesn't she?" he asked her. The girl nodded her head. "All right," Gomez said as he stood up and made his way over to the door.

When he arrived at Christella Revy's personal lounge, he saw a man wearing a brown duster and a wide-brimmed hat. He had dark red hair and a trimmed beard and mustache. "So, you _were_ able to make it after all," Gomez said. The man nodded his head.

"Gomez, please show Bogaros to his quarters while we make arrangements for tonight's activities. In another hour, I want you check on Dr. Hikawa and report back to me on his progress. That will be all for now," Revy said in a business-like manner. "Yes, Ma'am."

Line Break

"And so, CLASS, we have a NEW STUDENT joining us TODAY!" Mr. Anthony DeMartino said to his class as a young woman with black hair stepped into the room. She was wearing blue slacks and purple sneakers, along with a yellow T-shirt. "Please, TELL us YOUR NAME, so that we may MOVE ON with OUR LIVES!" DeMartino said. "Ahem. My name is Marionette Zueltvandert. I just moved here," the girl chirped happily.

 _She reminds me of Brittany before the other week_ , DeMartino thought to himself. _Please, God, please don't let her be as stupid as Brittany pretended to be!_ Ever since Brittany had revealed that her stupidity was _mostly_ an act, DeMartino had become less frustrated around the girl, although she still had some moments of airheadedness from time to time.

 _Well, she seems perky_ , Daria thought to herself. "Now, Miss Zueltvandert, PLEASE... take A SEAT," DeMartino said. "Okay!" she chirped as she walked over and sat down in a chair near the back. **I don't know what it is, but that girl... she irks me** , Birdy commented. _That's what happens when an intelligent person is introduced to someone with the vocal pitch of nails on a chalk board_ , Daria replied mentally.

 **No, there's something else. I don't know what it is, but there's something else about her. I don't know, maybe you're right. Maybe I** _ **am**_ **just being paranoid** , Birdy conceded. Ever since the battle with Bacillus, Birdy had become slightly paranoid, even though she _knew_ that Bacillus was finally dead. Still, he'd awakened old memories and unpleasant nightmares within her.

Daria didn't risk a glance back at Marionette, but if she had, she would've noticed the slight glances that the girl would send her way every few minutes. She didn't smirk or smile. She didn't frown or snarl. She simply glanced in Daria's direction every few minutes, formulating a plan to gather as much information as possible, and what better place to learn than school?

Line Break

Detective Goldsmith and Detective Horner both looked at the cat scans and X-Rays of the dead man's body on the medical examiner's computer screen. "So... why does his brain look so weird?" Horner asked the Dr. Frizzell. "Ah, you noticed that? See it's shriveled up, compared to a normal brain. The cerebrum has shrunk by two-thirds, and if you look at that portion over there..." Dr. Frizzell said, "You'll see that's it's enlarged, swollen."

"Uh-huh. Is that significant?" Goldsmith asked Frizzell. "Well, that region of the brain is called the cerebellum. It's the region most responsible for the attack instinct in humans, as well as totalitarian control. I know this may sound a bit weird, but during my university days, while I was studying, I came across some interesting documents in one of the libraries. Of course, I don't know if those documents are still there or not, but what I saw was stuff that had to have been made available to the public by complete accident," Frizzell said.

"What do you mean?" Horner asked him. "These were medical documents for various experiments made by the Japanese during World War II. Most of it was connected to other research made by the Third Reich, but some of it, the most interesting bits I'd say, was completely independent of German support. It was most likely very secretive."

"Um, are you going to explain any of this to us?" Goldsmith asked him. "Right. Anyway, what we're seeing here is very similar to the research notes and test results contained in those documents I saw. Even the body's physical state is similar to that of the people listed in the documents. The purpose was to create fierce and obedient soldiers by using carefully selected drugs to affect their brains," Frizzell explained.

"The Japanese military, and that of Germany, was doing all kinds of human experiments during that war. I can only guess that these documents were initially confiscated by our own military after the Japanese surrendered. The documents that I looked at weren't the originals, merely copies, and certain parts had been censored or even redacted. You know, covered with marks," Frizzell said.

"Which university did you find these at?" Goldsmith asked him. "Bromwell," Frizzell said. "Do you know if these documents are still there?" Horner asked. "I have no idea, and I only remember a few specific portions of it. But what I'm seeing here fits what I remember," Frizzell replied.

"Well, let's get going," Goldsmith said. "Huh?" Horner asked him. "We're taking a trip to Bromwell. Come on," Goldsmith said as he left the room.

Line Break

In Dr. Hikawa's lab, Adam Morris threw his head back in pain and cried out as the final phase of the experiment proceeded. "Urk, aahh! Aaaah!" He soon began foaming at the mouth as his cries continued. Meanwhile, in the observation area, Hikawa looked on with sadistic pleasure.

"Does it _hurt?_ Are you _suffering?_ " he asked in a mocking tone. "But just think! You're becoming a superior being!" Hikawa said breathlessly as he watched his experiment near completion. "Just a little more."

Line Break

The Zon, located on Dega Street, was an average music/bar place, although it was quite grungy and very filthy. As Daria and Jane watched Mystic Spiral perform their first set on stage, Daria noticed a young man her age with brown hair smiling at her. She briefly felt a blush creeping on to her cheeks. Strangely enough, the more Daria looked at him, the more she realized that he seemed out-of-place in the Zon.

"Hello," he said as he held a hand out to her. "Um, hello," Daria replied, extending a hand out to his, somewhat reluctantly. "The name's Tom. Yours?" he asked her in a polite manner. "Daria," she replied. "Nice name. So, you come here often?" Tom asked her. "Only when Mystic Spiral is on stage," Daria replied.

"Mystic... Spiral? Oh, they're the guys up right now, aren't they?" he asked. "Yeah. Jane's brother, Trent, is the lead singer," Daria said. "Jane?" Tom asked her. "My friend. She's right over... Jane?" Daria asked as she saw Jane over by the bar, talking to an older girl, who seemed to have a grunge-type look about her. She didn't notice the girl with black hair lurking in the shadows, watching her.

Jane looked over and saw Daria, waved, and decided to bring her friend over with her to meet them. "Hey, Daria. Hey..." "Tom." "Tom, this is Monique. She's the lead singer of The Harpies. She's also Trent's girlfriend," Jane said. "Hi," Monique said. "Hi," Daria and Tom both said. Daria felt her heart sink a little, after learning that Trent had a girlfriend. She'd had a crush on Jane's brother for a while, and it had heightened exceptionally after a failed trip to Alternapalooza.

"Well, as long as he isn't playing Ice Box Woman again, Trent and I should be on good terms this week," Monique said. Monique, as with many people who heard Mystic Spiral, had an extreme distaste for Ice Box Woman, especially since Trent had written it during one of his and Monique's recurring break-ups.

"So, is your band performing after his tonight? Or is it one band per night?" Tom asked her. "It depends on the night," Monique said. "You're not really from around here, are you?" she asked as she looked at his outfit. Tom was wearing clean pants, a polo shirt, and his hair was combed.

"Well, I do live in Lawndale," Tom said. "I've never seen you in school before," Jane said to him. "Well, I don't go to the local high school. I... go to Fielding," Tom said. "Wait, isn't that the prep school?" Jane asked him. "Um... yes," Tom said reluctantly. "So, what's a prep boy doing out here? Did you get lost or something?" Jane asked him.

"No. I just wanted to check out the night life," Tom said. "As opposed to the day life," Daria quipped. "Well, day life is quite boring," Tom said with a smirk. "I mean, being able to easily see where you're driving and not feeling tired? What's so fun about that?"

Daria chuckled lightly. "So, Jane, your brother is the singer, right?" Tom asked. "That's right," Jane said. "I don't suppose you sing too," he said. "Sure. Old McDonald had a farm! Ee-I-Ee-I-" "That's really awful. Please stop," Tom said. "Well, you're certainly honest," Jane said with a smile.

"So, a prep boy? How often do you get to listen to stuff like this at home?" Daria asked Tom curiously. "I try to keep a variety of stuff. Most of it's hidden under my bed, along with the knives, booze, porn mags, and ever essential black market gun collection," Tom jokingly replied. "Oh, and my Lenny Bruce CD's," Tom added.

"Lenny Bruce?" Jane asked. "He was a comedian. Well, a philosophical comedian from Britain. Like a British George Carlin or Bill Hicks," Tom said. "What about Dennis Leary?" Jane asked. Monique shot her a glare. "Do not speak of that man when we are discussing Bill Hicks," Monique said. "Um, okay?" Jane said.

"Leary stole some of Hicks' work and never gave him credit," Tom explained. "Oh," Jane said in realization. "Like a band performing a cover and claiming that it's their own original work?" Jane asked. "Pretty much. You know, theft of intellectual property, only with swear words," Tom replied. "Well, swear words do make everything more important," Daria commented with small smile.

"Damn straight," Tom said with a grin. Daria felt her blush returning slightly.

Line Break

"Puppet Master," Revy said on her cell phone, "How is your mission progressing?" " _Daria and Jane are currently socializing with two others; a young man and an older woman. We are currently located in a place called The Zon. It's located on Dega Street,_ " Marionette said over the speaker of the phone. "Good. Keep an eye on them but _do not_ engage them. Dr. Hikawa and I have a special surprise for Birdy tonight, and I need her alive for it to work," Revy replied.

" _But if you plan on attacking her, then what's the purpose of my spy mission!? Are you just getting me out of your hair for the day?_ " Marionette asked. "Your mission is a contingency plan. If this fails, or anything else does, we can always fall back on you to take her out when she's at her most vulnerable," Revy explained.

" _Understood. Puppet Master out,_ " Marionette said before hanging up. "Gomez, I need you to take make on a path that will go past this place called The Zon and lead toward our selected location for tonight's event. I don't want poor Birdy to miss out on the fun," Revy said.

Line Break

As Daria and Tom left the Zon with Jane, Daria felt a strange ringing in her ears. _What is that?_ **I don't know, but it's calling to me** , Birdy said. _You?_ **Yes** , Birdy replied. Meanwhile, Tom and Jane watched Daria's facial expressions curiously.

"Is she okay?" Tom asked Jane. "She does this when she's thinking about something really deeply. I need a bullhorn to snap her out of it sometimes," Jane lied. "Huh? It almost looks like she's having a conversation with herself in her own head," Tom commented, causing Jane to raise an eyebrow. _Damn, Prep Boy is really observant_ , Jane thought.

Soon, a limousine slowly drove by and the window rolled down. Daria looked at the occupants of the vehicle. There were two women, one in her thirties or forties, and the other looking young, but with a strange complexion. She seemed almost doll-like. The older woman had short hair, and she actually looked like an older version of Jane. She had two red objects attached to her ears, one of which was glowing.

She smiled and reach over to hold the earring on her left ear and squeezed it, causing the glow to stop. The noise stopped too. Daria's eyes widened as she fought Birdy from taking control of her body. **Let me do it! That's her! That's Christella Revy! Let me go! She's mine!** Birdy screamed internally.

The windows rolled up and the vehicle drove off. Jane looked at Daria and noticed the blood dripping from her clenched fists. "I'll catch you guys later. I need to go somewhere," Daria said as she ran off. She took off her glasses and tucked them into her jacket pocket.

"Um... okay. What's that all about?" Tom asked Jane. "I have no idea. Go home, I'm gonna go after her," Jane said as she ran off after Daria. "Daria, get back here!" Jane yelled out. Tom stuck his hands in his pants pockets and tilted his head in confusion. "Okay then. I guess I'll get in my rust bucket and head home. At least I got one of their phone numbers, I think," he muttered as he walked towards an old rusty pinto parked on the sidewalk.

Line Break

Daria quickly transformed into Birdy and took off, jumping onto multiple cars as she followed the Limo. _Birdy, what are you doing!? People can see you!_ **Doesn't matter. I am** _ **not**_ **letting Revy get away!** Birdy jumped onto a large truck as she ran forward and jumped toward the top of the limo. The vehicle pulled into the next lane, causing Birdy to yelp as she landing on top of another car instead.

Inside the car, Jake Morgendorffer cried out in panic. "What the hell!?"

On top of the car, Birdy leapt back onto the truck and ran forward, leaping onto the roof of a car near the limo. As she was about to turn and jump, the limo turned a corner and the car kept going straight. Birdy scowled at her luck.

"Dammit!" Birdy cursed as she jumped off the car and onto the sidewalk. She ran at full speed in her pursuit of Revy's limo. **I can't lose her!**

Line Break

"Hikawa, she's following us. I hope that your project is ready," Revy said into her cell phone. " _I just finished an hour ago. The subject is at the requested location,_ " Hikawa said over the phone. "Good. I hope the results are worth the wait," Revy said as she hung up. _Idiot. You've rushed things again, haven't you? Well, at least I have Marionette's plan to fall back on if-no,_ _ **when**_ _this plan fails_ , Revy thought to herself as Gomez drove the limo into the business section of Lawndale, eventually pulling into a garage next to a large office building.

Line Break

"Dammit Birdy, or Daria; whichever one decided to chase that damn car," Jane panted as she stopped to catch her breath. She looked at the large office complex next to the garage that Birdy had followed the limo into several minutes earlier. "The things I do," Jane muttered as she took a breath and started running again.

Line Break

Birdy looked around the hallway as she exited the elevator. She was silent as she made her way through the darkened halls of the building. Eventually, she came to a corridor that had light in it, and saw a young man wearing only pants. He had a hunched-over posture as he raised his head to look at her with dead eyes.

 _What the hell is this?_ "I guess we'll have to find out," Birdy said as she cracked her knuckles. The man raised his hands out to his side, before moving them forward.

Line Break

Watching the scene from a security monitor, Hikawa grinned. "Alright... _begin!_ "

Line Break

The man brought his hands back and then shoved them both forward, causing an invisible force to send Birdy flying backwards through the hallway. "Shit! He has telekinesis!?" Birdy exclaimed. The man held his hands out and the glass window of an office cracked and then exploded. The shards swirled in the air in front of the man and then he sent them flying forward.

Birdy dodged as quickly as possible, but she wasn't able to avoid all of the shards as they sailed past her. "Damn," she muttered as she saw the bleeding cuts on her leg and left side. She looked back at the man and stood up before running away, just as he shot another telekinetic wave at her, pushing her through the wall of an office. Birdy crashed into a chair and fell over it, rolling on the ground until she was able to stand up, just as Morris walked in and sent another wave at her, sending her flying through a window, shattering the glass and flying through the air towards another building across the street.

Down below, just near the entrance of the garage, Jane looked up after hearing the shattered glass and saw a figure flying through the air. "Birdy? Daria?" she asked with concern under her breath. Jane moved away from the garage and began making her way back toward the street.

Birdy shifted her legs under her and then pushed as she slammed into the side of the building, leaving a shallow crater as she stood on her feet. Her hair was still affected by gravity. _Holy, shit! What are you, Spider Girl?_ **Who?** Just then, Morris landed on the side of the building as well, facing her as he touched the building with all four limbs.

"So," Birdy said as she sized him up, "I see you have psy-power. It's a shame that you work for Revy." The man drew a snarled breath, causing the glass of the windows to break and shatter around him. He then let out his breath in a growl as the shards flew through the air at Birdy, who dodged all of them this time and ran up the side of the building before jumping onto the roof. Morris landed shortly after her and stood up.

Not giving him a chance, Birdy rushed forward and punched him before performing a spinning kick that sent him stumbling sideways. Birdy grabbed him and turned him to face her as she hit him in the chest again and again before kicking him in the torso, sending him flying back at the air vent on the roof.

 _Birdy, what kind of alien is this guy?_ Birdy stopped and took a good look at Morris. **I don't think he's an alien. In fact, I think he's terrestrial** , Birdy replied with some uncertainty and, deep down, sorrow. _What do you mean?_ "He's an Earth-born human," Birdy explained out loud as she saw Morris lift his head.

He began to smile as his shoulders bulged and his skin changed color, from tan to blue and green. His hair turned from brown to silver-ish gray. His face began to morph into something reptilian and feral, and his eyes changed to bright red. _You were saying?_ He stood up and took three slow steps toward Birdy, hissing at her. "Oh yeah. Vocalize _now_ of all times," Birdy quipped.

Morris shot an arm forward and Birdy dodged the wave as it crumpled the metal safety rails a few meters behind her. She ran forward and tried to kick Morris, but he produced a visible shield that sent Birdy flying back into the already damaged rails. She yelped in pain as her left side hit the rail.

She tried standing up and began moving forward, only for Morris to aim his hands down and cause that portion of the roof to collapse under Birdy. She fell down with the debris, crying out in surprise. She landed on a hard floor and looked up just as a large chunk of the roof landed on top of her. For a minute, there was only silence, before a small creak led to a loud rumble and a yell of fury.

Morris watched as a large chunk of the roof came flying into the air, with Birdy holding it from underneath as she landed on an undamaged section before throwing it at him. He used his psionic shield to break up the chunk of debris before raising the pieces into the air. He stared at Birdy as he began to aim the pieces of debris at her.

Line Break

On a roof-top not far away, a shadowy figure with a brown duster set up his sniper rifle and took aim. "Adjusting aim for distance and telemetry. Adjusting aim for wind-speed velocity. Aaannd... target acquired," he said gruffly to himself with a smile. He placed his finger on the trigger and waited.

Line Break

Birdy was panting in exhaustion now, and sweat was covering her face. She waited for Morris to attack, but his breathing began to hitch, and he began to shiver and convulse. The chunks of debris fell around him as he grabbed his head with his now-reptilian hands and cried out in agony. Birdy, sensing this as her chance, rushed forward and pulled back a fist.

She let it fly, but stopped mere inches from Morris's face. " **P-Please,** " he cried. " **What-What's happened to me!? What's happened to my body!?** " "What the?" Birdy asked herself as she saw the man-beast before her shivering in fear and confusion. He brought his hands up to his face and looked at himself in horror.

" **Somebody! Please! Help me! Please, help me! Do something! Pleaaaaaaaaacck!** " Morris cried out at a bullet passed through his heart and sped out of his chest, leaving a gaping wound. He quickly fell forward and slammed his now bleeding chest onto the surface of the roof-top. He began to revert back to his human form as he died, showing himself as a skinny man who seemed aged.

 _He... he_ _ **was human**_ , Daria realized with regret. Birdy looked up from the body and scanned the area, looking for some sign of the person who had shot Morris. She saw a tiny reflection of light in the distance, just on top of a roof far away. She could barely make out a small figure retreating into the darkness.

 _He... did he even_ _ **want**_ _to fight us?_ "No," Birdy whispered sadly. "He was a pawn, used by Revy and her cohorts. Just like so many others. But... this isn't like Revy," Birdy said as she knelt down beside the still-warm corpse. _What do you mean?_ "Well, in my past experience, Revy prefers machines over people. Robots and cyborgs with only basic organic components are easier to control and manipulate than living, breathing people who can feel and think for themselves," Birdy said.

"I think someone else was behind this. Revy's definitely involved, but someone else was in charge of this particular experiment," Birdy said with thinly veiled disgust. _What do we do about him? Can we really just leave his body here?_ Birdy was about to respond when she heard footsteps behind her. She turned around and saw a blond man with a green suit walking towards her. He was wearing sunglasses.

"Do I know you?" Birdy asked him as she assumed a defensive posture. "I know that I've seen you before somewhere," Birdy said as he walked closer. "Don't come any closer!" Birdy said to him. He didn't pause at all. "I warned you!" Birdy exclaimed as she rushed forward, launching a punch at him.

Gomez quickly side-stepped her and grabbed her by the arm, twisting it behind her back and dislocating it. "Aaah!" Birdy shrieked in pain before Gomez let her go. She staggered forward before turning around to see Gomez picking up the body. "Listen, Cephon," he said, "I'm giving you a warning. Stay out of Christella Revy's business. You'll live longer."

With that, Gomez walked over to the edge of the roof and jumped down. Birdy looked away and slowly made her way to the fire escape on the side of the building. "I need to get to the shuttle," she said in a pained voice. By the time she reached the bottom, she had transformed back into Daria. **Daria, I need you to take me back to the shuttle, please!**

"I... I'll try," Daria said as she winced in pain at her arm. Her shoulder was dislocated, just as Birdy's was. She ended up managing to walk about two blocks before she collapsed from exhaustion and pain. She closed her eyes tiredly just as she heard the faint sound of someone calling her name.

Line Break

Jane watched as the tube of liquid slowly drained. She'd learned through a roughly translated manual that the healing tank could be detached from the wall and shifted into a slanted position for easier access. She heard the hiss of the cover detaching itself as Birdy, completely naked, sat up and tried out her arm. "Okay, we're healed," she said before she looked over at Jane.

"Thanks, Jane," Birdy said. "No problem," Jane said in a relieved tone. "Next time I see that guy, I'll tear him to pieces," Birdy said. _Right. Because that worked so well when your arm_ _ **wasn't**_ _dislocated_ , Daria quipped. "Shut up, Daria," Birdy retorted defensively.

Jane raised an eyebrow. "Um... am I... missing something?" Jane asked her. "Oh, nothing important," Birdy replied as she stepped out of the tube and walked over to Jane. "If you could kindly grab my modulator and hand it to me, I could resume Daria's form. I'm pretty sure her glasses are in there," Birdy requested.

"Huh? Oh, right!" Jane said as she grabbed the modulator from the console and handed it to Birdy. Birdy attached it to her wrist, but didn't activate it. "So, Jane... what happened after I took off earlier?" Birdy asked her. She sat down on the edge of a seat by the control console, not caring at all about her nudity.

"Well..." Jane said, staring at Birdy's form, "Um, Tom... went home, and I... uh, chased after you. Well, Daria, but you, I mean... both of you," Jane said. "Jane... my eyes are up here," Birdy said with a hint of playfulness. "Sorry," Jane said. "For what? You've never seen another person naked before?" Birdy asked her. "No-I, I mean, yes, I have! But, just... not in such a... _brazen_ fashion," Jane replied.

"Um... okay. I'm not sure what you mean by brazen, but whatever. Anyway, this kind of thing really isn't important in the grand scheme of things. You clearly find my physical body to be attractive. Who cares? I find plenty of people to be attractive, too," Birdy said. "Um... do you mean guys, or..." "Does it really matter? In the grand scheme of things, does it really matter who I find myself attracted to, as long as I still do my job and try to keep people safe?" Birdy asked in response.

"Well, when you put it that way... No. I guess it doesn't," Jane said. "Exactly... unless I find myself attracted to someone who's trying kill innocent people. Now _that_ is problematic, not to mention a conflict of interest," Birdy said. "So... you wanna tell me what happened out there?" Jane asked her. "Sure. Take a seat, though," Birdy said. Jane made a 'what the hell' gesture and sat down. "All right. Talk."

Ending Line Break

Ending Theme: In The Night (Full English Version) from Key The Metal Idol. Performer unknown, but it sounds really, really good. Look it up on YouTube when given the chance.


	5. Episode 1-05: The Metal Maiden

**DARIA THE MIGHTY**

Birdy The Mighty is property of Studio Madhouse.

Daria and Beavis and Butthead are property of Glenn Eichler, Mike Judge and MTV.

Episode 05: The Metal Maiden

* * *

Christella Revy swam gracefully through the water of the pool, allowing herself a rare moment of relaxation as she closed her eyes moved with the flow of the substance around her. Eventually, she broke through the surface of the water and climbed out. She looked up and saw a brown-haired gentleman standing next to Ondine, the doll-girl.

"Ondine, are you happy that you're big brother was able to make it today?" Revy asked as Ondine handed her a towel. Ondine nodded her head. "So," Gomez said, "That's her name?"

"Yes. You didn't know?" Revy asked him. "No," he replied. "Hm, well I'm glad you don't ask too many questions, Gomez, but sometimes I wonder if you don't ask enough either," Revy said.

[Quick note: Ondine's name is pronounced: Own-Deen]

Line Break

Daria looked around the empty halls of Highland Middle School. "How did I get back here?" she asked herself out loud. "Oh wait, I know. I'm in Hell," she said flatly as she looked into a classroom and saw dozens of students, all of whom were copies of one of two complete imbeciles. "Hu-hu-huh," they mumbled. "He-he-he," mumbled the rest.

"Yep. Definitely Hell," Daria said. "It's not so bad," said a female voice from behind her. Daria turned around and saw Birdy walking up next to her. "What are _you_ doing here?" Daria asked her. "I don't know," Birdy replied thoughtfully. "But... I think our subconsciouses are started to become more in tune with each other."

"Really? Will this become more common as time goes on?" Daria asked her. "It's possible, but I've never really done something like this before now, so I'm not entirely sure," Birdy replied in an honest tone. "Hey, Diarrhea, who's the hot chick?" one of the Buttheads asked her.

"I'm Birdy Cephon," Birdy replied. "Cool. Are you, like, part bird or something?" Butthead asked her. "You know, it's kind of frightening that I can still remember their personalities after having been away from them for so long," Daria said with a shudder. "Don't worry, I'll keep you safe from these... um, who are they anyway?" Birdy asked.

"Beavis is the blond one and Butthead is the brown-haired one," Daria explained. "Butthead? I know that a lot of names from where I live would sound strange to an Earth-born human, but what kind of name is Butthead?" Birdy asked her. "His mother was on a mescaline high when she named him," Daria said. "Besides, this is Highland. It's a hive of scum and stupidity," Daria added, heavily paraphrasing a line once spoken by the late Sir Alec Guinness in one of his most famous roles.

"I think... the only person who I really enjoyed seeing in this place was a teacher named Van Driessen. He was one of the few people who could be around Beavis and Butthead without tearing his hair out or going insane," Daria said. "Um, Diarrhea, could I, like, speak to the attractive girl?" Butthead asked her.

"Which one?" Birdy asked him. "Um, obviously-ah!" Butthead said as Birdy kicked him in the face. "He-he-he Cool!" the Beavises all said in unison. "Hey, Daria. Do you want to let off some steam and frustration?" Birdy asked her as she cracked her knuckles. Daria looked uncertain for a second, before she smiled and nodded her head in agreement.

Line Break

Detective Horner picked up another old medical book and looked at its contents. "Nothing in this one either," he muttered as he slumped against the desk. "I've gone through thirty of these damn things now," he said to himself as he looked at the book. "And not one of them has anything even remotely related to what I'm looking for. This blows."

Line Break

"So... Daria Morgendorffer," Christella Revy said as she looked over the files in front of her. "Last Recorded Age: Sixteen Years. Last recorded height: I don't care. Blah, blah, oh. Family. Let's see... Biological Father: Jake Morgendorffer. Biological Mother: Helen Morgendorffer. Siblings: Quinn Morgendorffer," Revy read aloud.

"What about the files for Jane Lane?" Gomez asked her. "I'll get to those when I'm ready. Right now, I need to think of a plan for Puppet Master, and then we have Ondine's big debut later this week," Revy replied. "So Puppet Master is still a reserve?" Gomez asked. "Of course. I won't use her unless things reach a point where she will be the most effective. She needs time to build up a rapport with the girls and their associates. It will make things much more interesting when she finally strikes, don't you agree?"

"I suppose so," Gomez said. "Quinn Morgendorffer... I want to know more about Daria's sister and other family. Something we can use against her if necessary. I want the same for Jane Lane's family and associates. I want this before the end of the week. Is that understood, Gomez?" Revy requested. "Yes, Ma'am," Gomez replied. "But, what about Bogaros?"

"He's a contingency plan. A man with a gun is a very direct method of attack, and if necessary, the most unexpected course of action that anyone would ever think to associate with me," Revy replied. "I understand," Gomez said.

Line Break

Helen Morgendorffer's red SUV slowly moved down the rode, occasionally lurching to a stop. Inside, Helen sat in the passenger seat while Daria was in the driver's seat. "Alright, Daria. Don't start to turn until your front wheels are past the curb," Helen said calmly as Daria nervously drove forward.

"That's good. now, accelerate as you start to straighten. Very good," Helen said as Daria followed her instructions. "Okay, now watch out for that dog. Daria, watch out!" Helen cried as Daria slammed on the brakes. "Oh my god, did I kill him? I never even saw him! I'm a dog killer!" Daria cried out in panic.

"It's okay, Honey. Look," Helen said as she pointed to the dog running across the street. "That was close," Daria said, slowly calming down. "No harm done," Helen tried to assure her. "I couldn't live with myself if I hit a dog. Would you mind telling Quinn that I killed him?"

"Daria, didn't you see him? He came running right up on your side of the car," Helen said. "I don't see way off to the side too well. My glasses sort of block the view," Daria explained. "I didn't know," Helen said. "Is that a problem?" she then asked her daughter. "It is for dogs," Daria replied.

Later that evening, Daria sat on her bed watching Sick Sad World. " _When he turned up his nose at accordion lessons, they cut off his inheritance malto allegro. "The Severed Pianist," next on Sick, Sad World!_ "

There was a knock on the door. "Enter," Daria said. Helen opened the door and entered the room. "Daria?" she asked. "Correct," Daria replied. "Daria, I've been thinking about your peripheral vision," Helen began. "That's really strange. I was thinking about your high-frequency hearing," Daria snarked.

"Daria, how would you feel about trying contact lenses?" Helen asked her daughter. "Poorly," Daria replied in a terse manner. Helen walked over sat on the bed. "Why?" she asked her curiously. "Because there's nothing wrong with wearing glasses," Daria replied. "But what about that dog today?" Helen asked her. "Exactly. If he'd had his glasses on then he would have seen the damn car and we wouldn't be having this conversation," Daria replied.

"Daria, I just think that your field of vision could be enhanced," Helen said. "Come on, Mom. It's not my field of vision you want to enhance," Daria retorted. "What do you mean?" Helen asked her. "We've had this conversation before. You think if I get contacts I'll suddenly turn into the homecoming queen," Daria explained with a hint of bitterness in her voice.

"Daria, give me some credit. You can still wear your glasses. Nobody's going to take them away from you," Helen said. "But..." Daria trailed off, unable to think of a rebuttal. " _But_ , contacts are better for some things, like driving or sports," Helen said. "Finally," Daria said sardonically, "I'll be able to make the _wrestling team_."

"Daria, you can't possibly have some _ethical_ issue with wearing contacts," Helen retorted in an exasperated tone. **She has a point. Glasses and contact lenses have nothing to do with ethics** , Birdy pointed out to her. Daria frowned. "How about thinking people should accept me for who I am without my having to change?" she retorted.

"Right! They should accept you for who you are: a complex and interesting young lady worth knowing, instead of seeing your glasses and jumping to some moronic conclusion based on ridiculous stereotypes and their own ignorance," Helen said. "Mmm, good one," Daria muttered.

Line Break

The next day, at Jane's house, Daria was lounging on Jane's bed, reading, while Jane was eating cookie dough and painting a canvas. "I almost killed a dog yesterday," Daria blurted. "Hmm, are you gonna slowly work your way up to humans?" Jane asked her. "It was during my driving lesson," Daria explained. "Now my mother's bugging me about contact lenses."

 **Well, those** _ **would**_ **cause some problems during our transformations, now that I think about it** , Birdy commented. "Would you be quiet?" Daria asked. "I didn't say anything," Jane said, confused. "I meant Birdy," Daria explained. "Oh, is she on your mother's side in this issue?" Jane asked her. "No, she just thinks they might make our transformations more difficult," Daria replied.

"I guess neither of them get it, do they?" Jane asked. "No, they don't. Wait, get what?" Daria asked her. "You! The whole Daria Morgendorffer persona. You don't care what people think about your looks," Jane explained. "Of course not," Daria replied. "The glasses are you. They're symbolic of the whole Daria thing. "I wear glasses and I'm not going to apologize for it.""

"Yeah... exactly. Of course, you don't wear glasses, so from your point of view, it's all theoretical," Daria said. "Whad?" Jane asked around a mouthful of cookie dough. "Just pass the cookie dough," Daria said.

Line Break

Later on, Quinn Morgendorffer was in her room. She was standing in front of her mirrors, comparing different scarves. "Caramel... plum... of course, black is always good..." she trailed off as she looked down at another scarf on the floor. There was a knock at the door. "Come in!" she called out. She turned around and saw Daria entering her room.

"Daria? What are you doing here?" Quinn asked her sister. "Nothing. Just passing by. Saw your light on," Daria said. Quinn wasn't buying it. "What are you talking about?" she asked her older sister. "Uh, Quinn, could I ask..." Daria trailed off uncomfortably. "Yes? A question? A favor? A riddle?" Quinn asked her.

"Could I... could I ask your opinion on something?" Daria asked her. Quinn immediately became suspicious. "Is this a trick of some kind? What's the catch? Why don't you ask your friend Jane?" she asked her sister. Daria sighed. "Jane can't help me. I need to speak to someone more attuned to matters of... appearance," she admitted.

"You're asking for my advice, aren't you?" Quinn asked. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Quinn, please. This is hard enough," Daria said. "I always knew this day would come and wondered how it would be. Yet, now that it has, I feel strangely... serene. Sit down, Daria. I can help you," Quinn said.

"Who said I need help?" Daria asked as she sat on Quinn's bed. "Daria, if we're to make any progress at all you must be absolutely honest with me. Now, when did you first begin to suspect that your outfit sucked?" Quinn started. "It's not my outfit," Daria said. Quinn sighed.

"Okay, when did your "friend" first begin to suspect that your outfit sucked?" Quinn asked. "I don't believe this," Daria muttered. "Well, maybe the outfit isn't the problem. When did you first begin to suspect that your personality sucked?" "Quinn... Suppose you were well known for not caring what other people think of you, and then suddenly you did something that showed maybe you do care a little about what other people think of you. Would that invalidate everything you'd done and said up till then and make you a hypocrite? I mean, if you start doing the exact opposite what you'd done before and started doing what you swore you'd never do?" Daria asked her.

Quinn started thinking about recent events. The girl with two hair colors, Daria's really late nights and strange behavior at times, and then the strange and unusual events happening around town in the past two months. "Daria, whatever this is, just be honest with me, okay? Don't dance around the issue," Quinn demanded. "Fine. What would you think if I got contacts?" Daria asked her in reply. Quinn stepped back and blinked. _Well, I certainly wasn't expecting **that**_ , Quinn thought.

"Oh. Contacts? Um, yeah, that's great! But what color were you thinking? Because clear ones don't call attention to themselves so much, which maybe you want. But then, who could resist being able to change their eye color at will-" "Wait a minute! I-" "Blue goes with just about any outfit, but green adds that touch of exotica that many young women crave," Quinn continued.

"Hang on, all I asked was-" "Then, of course, you'll want to change your hair to frame your new face, a decision unto itself - and _obviously_ a new wardrobe," Quinn continued, oblivious to Daria's protests. "That's it. I can't take this anymore," Daria said as she got up and ran out of the room. Quinn finally noticed her sister leaving. "Huh? Daria, wait! I know you're scared. We'll start slow with some scrunchies!" Quinn called out to her as she chased her sister.

Line Break

Later, in the Morgendorffer dining room, Daria was eating cereal while her father was reading a newspaper. "Oh, that sister of mine. She's as twisted as a corkscrew," Helen said as she entered the room, holding a piece of paper. "Mmm," Jake said, not really paying attention to his wife. "Damn siblings," Daria commented.

"I mean, listen to this note she sent when she was in Hawaii: "Dear sis, you'd love island life. Beautiful sun, wonderful people, umbrella drinks up the kahanalea. Only thing is, you'd have to take a vacation. Oh well, sorry I brought it up. My love to all, Amy." God, isn't that annoying?" Helen asked in irritation, before she noticed something in the picture that Amy had sent her.

A plan quickly formed in her head. "Damn subtle barbs," she heard Daria say. "And just look at this picture of her smiling by the pool. As if she can even _see_ the camera without her glasses," Helen said, knowing that Amy wore contact lenses. "Aunt Amy?" Daria asked, taking Helen's bait. _Gotcha_ , Helen thought as she walked away after putting the note and picture on the table.

Line Break

Even later, Daria picked up the phone and began to dial her aunt's phone number. **So, this Aunt Amy... I take it that you get along well with her?** "Better than I do with my own mother at times," Daria said. **Hmm, interesting. What does she look like?** "An older version of me," Daria replied, unaware of Quinn listening in on her from outside her door.

" _Hello?_ " Amy asked over the phone. "Aunt Amy?" Daria asked. " _Hey, my favorite niece,_ " Amy replied. "Oh!" Daria blurted. " _Who is this?_ " Amy asked teasingly. Daria failed to catch it, though. "Um, it's-" " _Daria, relax. I'm joking. So, how are you? Your mother hasn't had a stroke, has she?_ " Amy asked her.

"Well, I haven't checked her in the last half hour. How was Hawaii?" Daria replied. " _Wish I were still there. What can I do for you?_ " Amy asked her. "Um, I wanted to ask your advice about something. I'm thinking about getting contact lenses," Daria said. " _Uh-huh, sounds good,_ " Amy said. "It does?" Daria asked her.

" _Why not?_ " Amy replied. "Well, isn't it kind of... vain?" Daria asked her. " _Do you have mirrors in the house?_ " Amy asked. "Yeah," Daria replied. " _Do you look in them before you go out?_ " she asked. "Yeah," Daria replied. " _Well, then, you're already going to hell, so you might as well get the lenses; you'll see the brimstone better,_ " Amy replied jokingly.

"What do you mean?" Daria asked her. " _I mean, having contacts is no more vain than primping in the mirror. It just gives you different options about the way you look. It wouldn't change your personality, it wouldn't change your values, [i]and_ it would set your parents back a couple hundred bucks. So, I don't see any downside at all,[/i]" Amy explained.

 _I hadn't thought of it that way_ , Daria realized. "Thanks, Aunt Amy," Daria said. " _I'd love to see how it turns out. Send me a picture, okay?_ " Amy replied. "You want a picture of me with my contacts?" Daria asked her. " _Sure, why not?_ " Amy replied.

Later, Daria found herself sitting on the couch in the living, reading a book, when Helen entered the living room. "Daria?" Helen began. "Hmm?" "I just want you to know that I was thinking about our conversation the other day, and I don't want you to believe for a second that I think you need contact lenses. You're beautiful inside and out, no matter what, and I understand and respect your objection to contacts, and there'll be no more discussions about it. Okay?"

"All right, you talked me into it," Daria said with a sigh. "I did?" Helen asked her. "Mom, that reverse psychology of yours is killer," Daria replied. Helen smiled. "All right. I'll call to set up and appointment," Helen said. "Or you could go online," Daria said. "Yes, I could do that too," Helen said.

Line Break

"So, you'll be getting contacts after school on Friday?" Jane asked Daria as they walked to their next class together. "Well, I'll be getting an eye examination so that they can make contacts for me," Daria replied. As the two of them neared Mr. DeMartino's class room, they saw Brittany conversing with Marionette. Brittany was wearing blue jeans and a red T-shirt. Her hair was straightened out, although she seemed to have cut it a bit short.

"So... Brittany _did_ quit the cheer-leading squad after what happened," Daria whispered to herself. Rumors of Brittany quitting after her brother's disappearance had been spreading around the school for several days. Brittany had resumed wearing her cheer-leader outfit for a couple of weeks after the Bacillus incident, but she just didn't have the heart to go through with the cheer-leading exercises anymore.

"And then I tipped the glass and spilled the whole thing all over his head," Marionette said excitedly. Brittany chuckled at her story. "He was _so mad!_ But it was totally worth it!" Marionette said with a giggle. "Oh, hi, Daria! Hi, Jane!" Marionette exclaimed with a wave and a smile.

"Hi... Marionette," Daria said hesitantly. While Marionette didn't seem to be outwardly dangerous, she was certainly annoying. "Yo," was Jane's simple reply. She didn't really care much for Marionette either. "So, what have you guys been up to lately?" Marionette asked them eagerly. "You know, anarchy. Mayhem, mischief, strapping rockets to penguins... the usual teenage stuff," Jane replied.

"That is _so_ thoughtful of you; giving those birds a chance actually fly, even if your method does make it their last," Marionette replied. For a second, Daria and Jane were both surprised, mainly because Marionette's reply toed the line between sincerity and sarcasm in a manner that they hadn't expected. "Um, were you, by any chance, being sarcastic?" Daria asked her. "Well of course," Marionette replied.

"You know, we really should get together some time," Marionette suggested. "Brittany and I are going to the arcade at the mall on Saturday. Maybe you'd like to join us?" "Um, let's not and say we did," Daria replied. "Your loss," Marionette replied with a cheerful tone as they entered the classroom.

As Daria took her seat, Marionette came over to her one last time. "What if I offered to pay for the pizza?" she asked. Daria looked at her analytically. "You're up to something," Daria retorted. "I just want to get to know you guys a little better," Marionette said in her defense.

"Hmm... free pizza _and_ arcade games. I'll _think_ about it, but I'm not making any promises," Daria said as she weighed her options. "That's fair enough," Marionette said as she returned to her seat. **She's awfully persistent** , Birdy noted. _I know. It would almost be endearing if she weren't so annoying_ , Daria replied mentally.

Line Break

"Ondine, are you ready for your big debut this weekend?" Christella Revy asked the young girl. Ondine nodded her head obediently as Revy caressed her hair in a gently manner. "You'll perform as expected, won't you?" Revy asked her gently. Ondine simply nodded her head with a smile.

"Do you really believe that Ondine will be able to defeat Officer Cephon?" Hikawa asked Revy as he looked out the window of her office. "She has a better chance than the others had. Birdy knows nothing about her, only that she's associated with me," Revy explained.

"Miss Revy, given how things have turned out so far, I'm beginning to think that perhaps we shouldn't go out of our way to attack Officer Cephon. All we're doing is drawing her attention to us," Gomez spoke up. "Please, Gomez. You're far too lenient," Hikawa commented. "Perhaps, but every single plan that we've used to eliminate her so far has resulted in a loss for us on some level. I think that keeping to ourselves may be a much smarter course of action," Gomez replied.

"Until we carry out the serum project, we can't even allow a pin-prick of interference in our plans," Hikawa said. "And I suppose that drawing attention to ourselves by constantly attacking Officer Cephon _isn't_ going to invite such a pin-prick?" Gomez retorted. "Each time we attack her, we're only giving her further confirmation of our presence in Lawndale. Sooner or later, she's going to find our base of operations," Gomez said.

"You do have a point," Revy said, "However, it is within our best interests to eliminate the danger that Birdy poses to our plans as soon as possible." "And you think that sacrificing Ondine is the solution?" Gomez asked her. "If she loses, then it is a necessary sacrifice. If she succeeds, then there is no reason to refer to it as such," Revy said. "What if the outcome is the elimination of both Cephon _and_ Ondine?" Gomez asked her.

"Then we still win, and Birdy Cephon Altera never interferes with us again," Revy said calmly. Gomez sighed. "Besides, I can always build another Ondine," Revy said. "Of course, Ma'am," Gomez replied.

Line Break

Thursday evening, Daria found herself walking through town, heading for the nearest place that sold toilet paper. Walking into Drugs 'N' Stuff, she located an eight-pack bundle. She checked her cash and headed for the counter when she saw a familiar face wearing an employee uniform. "Tom?" Daria asked. "Huh? Oh, Daria. Hey, what's up?" Tom asked her.

"Um... I'm buying toilet paper," Daria replied. "Yes. Did you want anything else?" Tom asked her. "No, I'm good," Daria replied as Tom scanned the bar-code on the packaging and took the twenty she'd handed him. "Okay, here's your change," Tom said as he handed it to her. "So, tell me; why exactly are you working here of all places?" Daria asked him.

"Well... I don't remember if I told you my last name, did I?" Tom asked her. "I can't recall," she replied. "It's Sloane. Of... Grace, Sloane, and Page," Tom explained somewhat hesitantly. "You're rich?" Daria asked him. "Technically, my family is," Tom replied. "Of course, my dad wants to groom me to be his replacement in the company some day, but I _really_ don't want to work there," he explained. "I've spent enough summers doing work in my father's office for "training" as it is."

"And this?" Daria asked him. "My way of _earning_ my own money _and_ sticking it to my father, since he's not exactly thrilled that I've chosen to be a pharmacy clerk," Tom replied with a smile. "Hn, well, that certainly is one way of looking at it," Daria said. "Yeah. Um, hey, Daria. Uh... I have off Saturday, and I was wondering... would you like to hang out? You know; get something to eat and just... talk about stuff and get to know each other better? My treat," Tom asked.

"Um..." Daria hesitated. _He's... is he asking me out? This isn't a prank, is it? Please don't let this be a prank_ , Daria thought. **Oh, just take the offer. You're going to get free food, aren't you?** _Well, yes, but-_ **Never turn down free food, Daria.** _ **Ever**_ , Birdy said firmly.

"Do you... like pizza?" Daria asked him hesitantly. "Sure," Tom replied. "Have you ever been to Pizza King?" Daria asked him. "Once, maybe. It was quite a while ago. Well it was either Pizza King or that Forest place," Tom replied. "Were there people wearing animal costumes making strange noises?" Daria asked him. "Not that I can remember," Tom replied. "Okay. We'll grab something at Pizza King and... um, talk, I guess," Daria said. "Sure. Do you want me to pick you up or should we meet up there at a designated time?" Tom asked her.

"How about..." _Let's see, if I have him pick me up, and he meets Dad, then that would be embarrassing. If we meet up at a designated time, then we have to trust that the other person will actually show up, and it could still turn out to be a prank if he doesn't show_ , Daria contemplated. **Daria, take a chance. You won't know unless you try. And no matter what happens, you can always look back on this as a learning experience, for good and for bad** , Birdy said. _Alright. At least having him pick me up adds some kind of assurance that it's actually happening_ , Daria noted.

"Pick me up at my place. Between five and five-thirty," Daria said as she turned to head for the door. "Um, wait, where do you live?" Tom asked her. Daria slapped herself in the forehead for forgetting that little detail. "Um, do you have something to write with?" she asked him. "Oh, sure," Tom said as he grabbed a note pad and a pen.

"Do you want to write it or should I?" he asked her. "I'll write it," Daria said as she took the note pad and pen from Tom's hands. She jotted down the address and her phone number and then handed the note pad and pen back to him. "Okay. I'll pick you up between five and five-thirty tomorrow," Tom said with a smile. "I'll... see you then," Daria said as she left the pharmacy. She returned three minutes later after realizing that she had forgotten the toilet paper on the counter, along with the receipt.

"Did you forget something?" Tom asked her humorously. "No. I usually leave stuff behind so that I can come back for it later. It's really fun," Daria replied sarcastically in her usual flat tone. "Well, I'll have to try it myself sometime," Tom said jokingly as Daria left the pharmacy again, this time with her purchase.

A minute later, a black-haired girl walked over and placed two boxes of Band-Aids on the counter.

Line Break

"I see. Yes, very good work, Puppet Master," Christella Revy said on her phone. " _What should I do now?_ " "Don't do anything until I say so. Wait until Ondine's debut, and then wait for me to give you orders afterwards," Revy replied. _But if Ondine eliminates Birdy, what will be the purpose of my spy mission?_ " Marionette asked over the phone.

"You can still gather information on other potential enemies or allies. Your main priority at this time is gathering information. Do not blow your cover by revealing yourself prematurely. Is that understood?" Revy asked her. " _Yes, Miss Revy,_ " Marionette replied with a sigh.

"Excellent. And, as I said, good work today. I hope that you will observe Ondine's debut on Saturday," Revy said. " _I already have plans, but I can rearrange things to make it work. I will do my best,_ " Marionette replied before hanging up the phone. "I should certainly hope so," Revy said as she stared out her office window.

Line Break

"Okay," Brittany said as she exited the pharmacy, "I'm back from the bathroom. So, where should we go next?" she asked Marionette. "Hey, Brittany. I've been wondering... do you want to stop by Pizza King on Saturday, before we hit the mall or some time after? I mean, we won't really hit the mall until after six, right?" Marionette asked her.

"I guess not. Sure, I could go for some pizza before hitting the arcade!" Brittany chirped happily. While Marionette could be a teeny bit annoying, she had proven herself to be a good listener. Brittany hadn't felt this good in a long time. It felt good to have a new friend like Marionette.

"Say, what did you buy in there?" Brittany asked as she looked at the bag in Marionette's hands. "Oh, just some Band-Aids. You can never be too careful sometimes," Marionette said. "Yeah. Hey, I'm sorry for taking so long in there," Brittany apologized. "Oh, don't worry about it. When you gotta go, you gotta go. So... how are things with Kevin lately?" Marionette asked her.

Brittany sighed. "Not good. I'm thinking that I'll break up with him for good soon, but I just can't find the right moment to do it. The sex with him is good, really good, but sometimes I think that's all he's really good at, other than football," Brittany said sadly.

"He does seem a bit... intellectually challenged, doesn't he?" Marionette asked. "Oh, you're telling me? Please. I have the sinking suspicion, that even with the No Child Left Behind Act, Kevin is still going to end up having to either take summer courses or repeat high school by the time we graduate," Brittany replied.

"Well, if you're right about his skills in the sack, I'm sure he could always find a job in the porn industry," Marionette joked. Brittany found herself chuckling. "Maybe, but then if he does role-playing as a football player, he might take it seriously. He might try to pass the ball to someone while _screwing still his partner!_ " Brittany said with a laugh. "He'll keep asking 'where's the ball?'" Marionette laughed too.

"And, when the director says 'cut!' he think the he's supposed to cut something," Marionette joked. Brittany laughed again. "And, and when they say 'action' he'll ask where the guns and explosions are at!" Brittany added. Both girls continued like this as they made their way through town.

Line Break

"Daria," Helen asked as they drove home from the Lawndale Medical Arts Partner building on Friday, "Is your eye okay?" Daria turned her head to glare at her. "Yes, it's fine, aside from the pain," Daria replied. "I didn't know that your eyes were that sensitive to touch," Helen said. "I'm pretty sure my scream could be heard all the way to the moon," Daria commented.

"Well, they'll have the contacts in the mail soon. You know that the ones they gave you to take home are just temporary, right?" Helen asked her as she turned a corner. "I hope so," Daria said. "They itch like crazy." "Well, you could always take them out and put on your glasses, since you aren't driving right now anyway," Helen said.

"That actually sounds like a good idea," Daria said as she began removing the contacts from her eyes. "Oh, um, by the way," Daria began, "I... um, have a sort of date on Saturday." Helen's eyes widened. "Really?" she asked her daughter. "Well, I'm not sure that it's really a date, but I'm going to get some pizza with this guy I met the other day," Daria said.

"Is he the same age as you, or at least around the same age bracket?" Helen asked her in a cautious manner. "Yes. He's about my age. Um, could you not tell Quinn? I really don't want her to try to give me a make-over," Daria said. "Sure, honey. So, are you meeting him for pizza or is he picking you up?" Helen asked.

"Picking me up. At the house. Where Dad and Quinn are," Daria said with nervous realization. "Oh, don't worry. I'm sure things will be fine. I make sure your dad doesn't have any bats or golf clubs near him when, um, what's this boy's name?" "Tom," Daria replied. "Right, when Tom comes over," Helen said.

"What's his last name?" Helen asked her as she pulled up into the driveway. "Um... it's Sloane," Daria replied hesitantly. "Sloane? That name sounds familiar," Helen said as she parked the car and took the keys out of the ignition. Daria quickly unbuckled herself and got out of the car before Helen could pry any further. "I should've kept my mouth shut," she muttered to herself.

 **Oh my goodness! You are being** _ **way**_ **too dramatic about this** , Birdy commented as Daria unlocked the front door and entered the house. _Oh really? Well what about when your parents became really nosy and embarrassed you?_ **I didn't have any parents. I was engineered in a lab, Daria** , Birdy replied solemnly.

 **The closest thing I ever had to a parent was a caretaker named Biley, or rather, Violin. I could never pronounce her name properly, so I always called her Biley, until the day she died, that is. You really should be more appreciative of the fact that you have parents who love you and care about you** , Birdy said. **The fact that they're asking questions about the people you spend time with at least shows that they care about your safety to some extent** , Birdy added.

 _I guess so_ , Daria replied as she made her way into her bedroom. A brief snippet of Birdy's memory of Violin's death flashed before her. _So... Biley, I mean, Violin, was your caretaker?_ **Yes. She was the closest thing I ever had to a mother or a parent of any kind. You see,** _ **most**_ **Alterrians are engineered in laboratories. We're... test-tube babies, so to speak. Only a handful of us are ever born through the method of sexual reproduction** , Birdy explained.

"Is Christella Revy one of the them?" Daria asked her quietly. **Given her life span, I don't think so. Naturally-born Alterrians tend to have shorter life spans than the genetically engineered ones, or at least the few naturally-born ones tend to, at any rate** , Birdy replied. **You see, for a period of time, most Alterrians were engineered to be sterile and infertile. Only starting with the generation before mine did that get changed, and Revy is probably from an old generation, even though she looks very youthful** , Birdy explained.

"So... living with me is the closest thing that you've ever had to a real family experience, isn't it?" Daria asked her quietly. **Yes. Yes, it is** , Birdy replied.

Line Break

Saturday morning, Daria called Jane. " _Relax, Daria,_ " Jane said over the phone. "I can't relax. I'm nervous," Daria said. " _Come on. Do want me to come over and hold your hand when he talks to you?_ " Jane asked jokingly. "Maybe. But then that might give him the wrong idea," Daria said.

It took Jane a minute to catch Daria's meaning. " _Well, it might make him want to ask both of us out next time,_ " Jane joked. Daria rolled her eyes. " _Hey, we'd both be getting free pizza,_ " Jane added. "True, but that would also make him run out of pizza money faster," Daria replied. " _Curse you and your logic, Morgendorffer!_ " Jane replied humorously over the phone.

"Although, if you want to arrive sometime after we've already gotten there and join us for a bit, I don't think either of us would really mind," Daria suggested. " _I'll see what I can do,_ " Jane said. "Thanks. So, I guess I _might_ see you around six or so," Daria said. " _Yep. See ya' later!_ " Jane said as she hung up.

Line Break

"Are you ready, Ondine?" Christella Revy asked the young girl. Ondine nodded her head and smiled softly at Revy. "You'll make Mama proud, won't you?" Revy asked her gently with a smile of her own. Ondine smiled and nodded her head again. "Good girl," Revy said.

"Now, be discrete and wait until the right moment. I'll be waiting for you to return after you've accomplished your mission," Revy said as she kissed Ondine on the forehead and ruffled her hair. Ondine merely smiled and walked out into the noon-time light, making her way through Lawndale.

Line Break

"So, I was thinking that we could go to Jodie's Fourth of July party together this year," Brittany said to Marionette as they made their way through town. "That sounds fun," Marionette replied. "You haven't really spoken much to Jodie and Mack, have you?" Brittany asked her. "Well, I've said hello to them a few times in the hallway, and I've asked Jodie for help with my class work at least once," Marionette replied.

"Well, Jodie's usually busy anyway, especially since her parents are always pushing her to take on more extracurricular activities than she can handle, and Mack is the captain of the football team. I remember that Jodie and I would hang out a lot during the summer, until her parents started making her focus on volunteer work and internships to make her college applications look good," Brittany said.

"I mean, I understand the importance of it, but she seems so overwhelmed with everything that they make her do. I think she's going to reach her breaking point before graduation, or sooner. Hey, we should invite her and Mack to spend time with us at the mall today! Well, if Jodie actually _has_ any free time today. She's been so busy lately, I think she's only had one free weekend in the past two months," Brittany said as she pulled out her cell-phone.

Marionette listened to Brittany on he cell phone. "Uh-huh. Well-oh. Sure! Say sometime around six? Pizza King, of course," Brittany said. "Mhmm, yep. See you guys then!" Brittany chirped before hanging up her phone. Marionette began adjusting her plan in her head to accommodate the newest variables. _I suppose I should just think of this as a challenge. Besides, talking Brittany out of this now would just make things suspicious of me later after Ondine makes her debut in public. I'll just have to play along and see what happens_ , Marionette thought to herself as the two girls continued walking.

Line Break

Later, around 5:15, after hearing the doorbell ring, Jake Morgendorffer opened the door and saw a young man around Daria's age with brown hair, wearing jeans and a black shirt with a faded yellow Batman symbol on it. "Quinn! Your date's here!" Jake called upstairs. "Um, actually, I'm here for Daria. This _is_ the Morgendorffer residence, isn't it?" Tom asked.

"Oh. Qui-I mean, _Daria_ , your... date is here!" Jake said. "Wow, I'm so used to using Quinn's name in that sentence," Jake said sheepishly. "Really?" Tom asked. "Yeah. Quinn has dates all the time," Jake explained. "So... what's your name?" Jake asked.

"Tom," Tom said. "Okay. What's your full name?" Jake asked, just as Daria came walking down the stairs. "Actually, his real name is Bruce Wayne," Daria said, looking at Tom's shirt. "He and I are going out to pick up our costumes and fight crime," Daria said sarcastically. "What!?" Jake asked. "Jake, she's _joking!_ " Helen said as she walked into the living room.

"Yeah," Tom said. "We're just heading out for some pizza and conversation," Tom explained. "Okay, but listen, Bruce-" "Dad, his name really is Tom," Daria interrupted him. "But you said-" "That was part of the joke. See his shirt?" Daria asked. Jake looked down at Tom's shirt and saw the Batman symbol. "Oh! I get it now!" Jake said with a grin. "See, Helen? They were joking!" "Yes, dear," Helen said wearily.

"Well, have fun!" Jake said as Daria and Tom walked away from the house. Tom walked over to a rusty Pinto and ushered Daria to get in. "Um, you do realize that we need to be _alive_ in order to eat pizza, right?" Daria asked him as she looked at the metal death-trap.

"Yeah, but don't worry. It hasn't exploded or fallen apart on me yet," Tom said as he opened the door and got in. Daria reluctantly followed suit. "Where to, my fair lady?" Tom asked her as they both buckled their seat-belts. "To the land of pizza," Daria replied as Tom put the key in the ignition and started the car. "As you wish," he said before driving off.

Line Break

At the Lawndale Police Department, Detective Goldsmith checked over some online records when Detective Horner burst into the room. "Goldsmith, I got something!" Horner said as he threw some papers and a large manila folder down on the desk. "Care to explain just what it is that you've found?" Goldsmith asked him.

Horner reached int the folder and withdrew a picture, turning it around for Goldsmith to see. "Um, okay. It's a group of Japanese soldiers," Goldsmith said. "Yeah, it's a picture of Unit 942 of the Imperial Army." Horner pointed his finger at a man in the bottom row with a serious look on his face. "This man here, Seichiro Hikawa. Second Lieutenant. Twenty-four years old at the time of the photo," Horner said.

"Okay, so he's probably dead or in a nursing home in Japan by now," Goldsmith said. "Yeah, I guess so," Horner said in agreement. "Well, now that you've got a name, keep up the work," Goldsmith said.

Line Break

Ondine watched quietly for any sign of her target. It was starting to rain lightly outside, but she was wearing her waterproof rain jacket. Eventually, a rusted old Pinto pulled into the parking lot of Pizza King, and a boy with brown hair got out, holding an umbrella and he walked around the car. The other door was already being opened and the girl with brown hair and glasses stepped out just as the young man reached her and covered her with the umbrella.

They were both facing away from Ondine, so she couldn't see their faces yet, and she didn't want to act prematurely in case the girl wasn't her target. Ondine turned her head as she heard the voice of the Puppet Master and another female nearing the entrance of Pizza King. Ondine kept herself hidden by the shadows as she watched the two pairs of people walk to the entrance.

Puppet Master and the other girl ended up blocking her view of the third girl's face as they entered the restaurant, and Ondine was unwilling to reveal herself unless she could positively identify her target. She couldn't make Christella proud if she screwed up by jumping the gun on the wrong target.

Line Break

Fifteen minutes later, Daria began eating a slice of pizza. Tom waited for her to chew before asking his first question. "So, have you lived in Lawndale very long?" Tom asked her between bites of pizza. "No. I only moved here last year," Daria answered between bites of pizza. "Hmm. Where did you move from?" Tom asked her. "A cesspool in Texas called Highland," Daria replied.

"You know, that name sounds familiar. Didn't President Obama get asked a very direct question regarding his policies by a student there some time ago?" Tom asked. Daria looked away for a few seconds before taking another bite of pizza. "Daria... you're being awfully quiet. Don't tell me... did you?" Tom asked. "Yes. I was the girl who criticized the president in public," Daria replied.

"Wow. That had to take some guts," Tom said in approval. Daria blushed. "T-thanks," she said. "So... why did you choose to work at a pharmacy of all places?" Daria asked him in return. "Well, I just don't like the office environment at my dad's workplace. It's kind of suffocating, really. Besides, when he found out that I'd been given a job in town as a pharmacy clerk, he was so disappointed that I'd chosen something that isn't really associated with our so-called social class," Tom said with a snicker.

"So, you got the job to get back at your father?" Daria asked him. "Well, that and to have my own source of income. It's nice to have money without needing to ask my parents for it. Besides, having a job can look good on college applications, although given my family's connections, I suspect that getting into some place like Bromwell or wherever is pretty much a given," Tom said.

"So, you won't even have to do much when you apply to college will you?" Daria asked in a slightly judgmental tone. "Well, I guess not really," Tom said. "And meanwhile hundreds of other people will end up putting themselves into massive debt while also having one or two jobs in order to get into a college," Daria said flatly.

"So... what? Because I can afford to get into a nice college without putting myself and my parents into crippling debt, I shouldn't even bother having a job to earn my own money?" Tom asked her, confused. "I'm not saying that, but-" "Actually, I think you are. Because I'm rich, you have some kind of bias against me, don't you?" Tom asked her.

"Well, um..." Daria trailed off. _I guess I do have a bias against him because of that, don't I?_ "Daria, come on, you're obviously smart enough to realize that I didn't exactly ask to be born into wealth. Is my family wealthy? Yes. Do I embrace every single aspect of it? No. But if my parents decide to set aside money for me to get into college without going bankrupt, then why not use it?"

"Well... I guess... I don't really know what to say," Daria admitted. "Well, doesn't my getting a minimum-wage job in order to make some kind of effort mean something? Daria, I like the fact that I can get into a nice college, but I also want to feel as though I've done something to earn it as well. That's part of why I decided to get a part-time job in the first place. Getting into college easily is nice, but at the same time, there really isn't a sense of vindication. Having a job sort of helps give me that feeling, and it helps to make me feel like I've done the work to earn something on my own, rather than having someone give it to me because of my name."

Daria thought about this for a little bit. "I think I get what you're saying," she said finally as she sipped her soda. "You would rather get something nice because you've earned it instead of getting a free pass solely because of your family's connections," Daria said. "Yeah. I think that sums it up," Tom said.

"And that's also why you accepted the lowly position of pharmacy clerk, of all things," Daria said to him. "Hey," Tom said in mock offense. "One day, I'll work my way up to the big leagues and become a stock boy at a grocery store," he said humorously. Daria smiled at his comment. "So," she began, "What's it like at a prep school?"

Line Break

Twenty minutes later...

Ondine raised her head and zoomed in on the girl in the red jacket with an umbrella walking towards Pizza King. She recognized her from Revy's files as Jane Lane, a very close associate and friend of Daria Morgendorffer, the human sharing Birdy's body. If Jane Lane was making her way to Pizza King, then the girl who resembled Daria... was actually Daria. Ondine's eyes flashed red in excitement.

Line Break

Daria looked up when she heard Brittany saying that she could see Jane making her way to Pizza King. She then saw the girl with the yellow rain coat standing outside. **Hey, I recognize her. She was in the car with Revy the other week, remember?** _Yeah, she does seem familiar, now that you mention it_ , Daria replied mentally.

 **Daria... that girl isn't human** , Birdy said. _What? Is she an Archazoid?_ **I don't know, but if she comes inside the restaurant, things could get ugly. We need to get outside to keep the people in here safe** , Birdy said as she forced Daria to stand up just as Jane walked in the door.

Daria walked over to Jane as she lowered her umbrella. "Jane, I need you to keep Tom and the others inside while we take care of something," Daria said. "Huh?" Jane asked her. "Look, out there," Daria said. Jane turned to look at the girl in the yellow rain coat staring at them. "You know her?" Jane asked. "Birdy says that she's one of Revy's robots," Daria explained.

Jane's eyes widened. "She sent her here to find us? But that would mean...Revy knows who we are," Jane said fearfully. Daria's eyes widened at the realization. _Birdy... Revy knows who we are. She has to. There's no other explanation_ , Daria said. **I know. Ever since the incident at the Zon, I've suspected that Christella Revy had somehow discovered us, but I didn't have any solid proof** , Birdy replied.

Just as Daria was about to speak to Jane again, the girl took off her rain coat and revealed her body. She was wearing a black and yellow leotard over her torso and groin area, but otherwise the prosthetic appearance of her body was unmistakable. "Jane, stay here. Birdy and I have to do this alone. We can't risk getting anyone else involved," Daria said as she walked outside. The rain was coming down a bit heavier now, but visibility hadn't been affected.

Daria took off her glasses, stuffed them in her jacket pocket, and strode forward. She quickly transformed into Birdy as Ondine assumed a fighting stance. Birdy smirked.

"Tell me; what's your name?" Birdy asked her. Ondine said nothing. She simply lunged forward at lightning speed, catching Birdy off guard as she punched her in the face. Birdy fell back and rolled over to avoid one of Ondine's legs crashing down.

Birdy leapt up and turned around, dodging one of Ondine's fists as she ducked and kicked her, sending Ondine stepping back slightly. Ondine punched Birdy in the face again and then delivered a spinning kick to Birdy's side. Birdy fell over to the ground, before Ondine grabbed her legs and lifted her up, spinning her around before tossing her at a parked car.

Birdy crashed into the vehicle with a cry of surprise and covered her ears when the alarm went off. Birdy quickly got up and leapt out of the way when Ondine lunged forward, dodging the robotic girl as she collided with the car, wrecking the vehicle. Ondine pushed herself back and spun around to jump up and deliver a flying kick into Birdy's torso, sending Birdy flying back and rolling onto the pavement of the parking lot.

Birdy quickly jumped up and rushed forward, jumping into the air and spinning around to deliver a kick to Ondine's face, sending the robot crashing back to the ground. When Birdy landed, Ondine, swung her legs around, kicking Birdy out from underneath. Birdy fell onto her back and groaned in pain before rolling over. She quickly got up and turned to look at Ondine, who had made her way over to the damaged car.

"What's she doing?" Birdy asked, before she gasped as Ondine lifted the car up over her head and threw it at her. "Shit!" Birdy swore as she leapt out of the way, only to be clipped in the hip by the car as it passed her and crashed into the street. Birdy rolled onto the ground and panted in pain as she placed her hand on her hip.

Ondine slowly made her way over to Birdy, who was carefully picking herself up off the ground. Birdy looked up and saw Ondine begin running toward her. "Oh shit," she muttered as Ondine got closer.

Line Break

"Hey," Brittany said as she saw some blurs of movement outside in the rain, "What's going on out there?" "Huh?" Marionette asked her. "Something's going-" Brittany was interrupted by the destruction of one of the restaurant's windows as two figures smashed through it. Shattered glass fell around the floor, and various patrons gasped and yelled in surprise at the spectacle.

Jane gasped as she saw Birdy on the floor being choked by a robotic girl. She grabbed a plate and dumped her pizza off of it before running over and smacking Ondine upside the head. Ondine turned her head and swatted Jane away with her right arm, loosening her hold on Birdy. Birdy used the opportunity to raise her legs up and push Ondine off of her. The robot was sent flying forward as she crashed into the table where Brittany and Marionette had been sitting.

Birdy jumped onto her feet and turned around. She raised her arms and fists into a boxing posture as Ondine turned around. Ondine stared at her impassively for a few seconds before lunging forward and tackling Birdy into a table, destroying the furniture and rolling on the ground until Birdy kicked her away and leapt back.

As Ondine rose up, Birdy lunged forward and punched her in the face, ducking a swipe and punching Ondine in the stomach before jumping up and kicking her. Ondine stumbled back and spun around to deliver her own kick as Birdy landed. Birdy fell back onto the floor and rolled over to avoid Ondine's next strike.

Birdy got up and leapt over Ondine, only to be caught by the ankle. Ondine applied pressure and Birdy yelled. Lifting Birdy into the air, Ondine spun around and tossed Birdy onto the counter. Birdy tumbled over the side and rolled into the kitchen.

She tried to stand up as she saw Ondine rush forward and leap over the counter. "Hey! Who the hell are you!? What do you think you're doing!?" the manager yelled at Ondine, who simply turned her head to look at him briefly before resuming her path toward Birdy.

"Artie! Call the police!" the manager yelled at a bespectacled man with freckles. "Y-Yes sir!" Artie said as he rushed over to the phone. He was just about to dial when Ondine smashed the receiver for the phone and tore it away from the wall. She grabbed the phone from Artie's hands and detached the cord, unwinding it completely from the receiver before detaching that end and twirling it around her fingers as she made her way over to Birdy.

Birdy had grabbed a large wooden paddle, and as soon as Odnine came into view, she swung, smacking Ondine in the face and causing her to spin around, kicking the paddle out of Birdy's hands, before punching Birdy in the face. She took the phone cord and wrapped it around Birdy's neck before pulling from both directions. Birdy grabbed at the cord around her throat, struggling to breathe as Ondine began to cut off her circulation.

 _No! I don't wanna die!_ **I-I can't... can't... I-I-I ca-I can't...** Ondine was so focused on her task that she paid no attention to the red figure moving behind her in the kitchen.

Jane grabbed a metal basket of fried garlic bread balls out of a deep fryer and rushed over to slam it into Ondine's head. "Let her go!" Jane shouted. There was still some oil on the basket, which dribbled onto Ondine's head and down her face. Ondine let go of Birdy, only to immediately stand up and spin around. Jane still held the basket in her hands as she raised it to strike again.

Ondine caught the basket and bent it with her left hand, crumpling it as though it were mere soda-can aluminum. She then dropped the basket onto the floor and cracked her knuckles while advancing on Jane, who backed away fearfully. The restaurant staff simply stayed out of the way, except one who jumped in front of Jane while holding a pizza cutter. Ondine simply grabbed him and pushed him aside. He wasn't on her list of authorized targets.

Ondine reached Jane and grabbed her by the lapels of her jacket and dragged her over to the deep fryer before grabbing the back of Jane's head with one hand. "No! Oh, no!" Jane cried out as she realized what Ondine was planning to do. "Oh God, someone please help me!" Jane cried. The manager and Artie rushed over to grab at Ondine's arms, but she kept one hand on Jane's head while leaving her other arm free to elbow and smack Artie and the manager away.

"My ribs," Artie whimpered as he back into a rack of plastic plates and napkins. "S-Someone! Someone call the police already!" the manager shouted at the top of his lungs.

Ondine had resumed her original posture with Jane. She had reached the deep fryer and was about the dunk Jane's head into it when she felt someone tapping on her head. "Hey. Get your fucking hands off of her," Birdy growled as she grabbed Ondine's arm and twisted it, snapping the limb off by the elbow. Ondine's cables and circuits fell out loosely and sparked a few times.

She let go of Jane and struck Birdy in the jaw, sending the alterrian staggering back with a yelp of pain. Ondine punched Birdy again and again, before Birdy managed to duck and kick Ondine's feet out from underneath her. Birdy back away as she leapt over Ondine's prone form and rushed to Jane's side. "Jane, hide yourself in a corner, now!" Birdy said. "Right, you got it," Jane gasped.

Birdy turned around and grabbed a large ladle off a rack. She dipped it into the deep fryer as Ondine got up and turned around. Birdy lifted the ladle out of the fryer and splashed the oil onto Ondine's face. Ondine rushed forward and pushed Birdy into a wall. Birdy pushed back and began punching Ondine in the face repeatedly as bits of her false flesh began to fall off, revealing a red eye and parts of a metal endoskeleton underneath.

Birdy continued her assault, forcing Ondine back with every step, until they were back at the fryer. Using a brief pause, Birdy grabbed Ondine's exposed elbow and shoved it into the oil. There was a large flash as Ondine's circuits fried and exploded. Ondine staggered back from the fryer and slumped down against a rack.

Birdy slowly walked over to her and raised a fist, preparing to deliver the final blow, when she stopped mere inches from Ondine's face. "Mama... I failed," she heard the robot whisper sadly as it rose up and sluggishly walked away. Everyone in the restaurant stood back as the robot slowly walked outside and into the rain.

Birdy slowly made her way into the lobby to follow Ondine. Tom saw Jane walking out of the kitchen and looked at Birdy, who followed Ondine into the rain. Birdy ran over to the side of the building, not realizing that she had been followed. She quickly transformed back into Daria, who slumped against the side of the building to catch her breath. She closed her eyes for a minute.

When she opened her eyes, Daria looked to her left and saw Jane, Tom, Marionette and Brittany staring at her. Her eyes widened as she realized that Tom and Marionette had seen her transform. She gulped.

"I..." she tried to speak, but found that she couldn't say anything more. Daria began to tremble as the situation began to overwhelm her. She put on her glasses and backed away from the group. "Daria?" Tom asked. "I-just leave me alone!" Daria cried as she turned around and ran away.

"Daria, wait!" Tom called out as he chased after her, followed by Jane. Brittany and Marionette were left standing by the side of the restaurant as they heard the sirens of police cars drawing near. "I think they're a bit late," Marionette said to Brittany. "Um, yeah," Brittany said quietly.

Line Break

"Daria!" Tom called as he tried to catch up with the girl. She had run almost a block away from Pizza King by now. He tripped and fell over, scraping his knee underneath his jeans before getting back up and painfully running again. Jane quickly ran past him and managed to catch up to Daria as she tripped and fell over. Daria crashed into a puddle and tried to get back up, only for Jane to run around and kneel in front of her. "Daria," Jane said as she placed her hands on Daria's shoulders.

"Listen to me, it's okay," Jane said. Daria shook her head. "N-No. No, it's _not_ okay! I almost got people killed today, and Tom saw me transform, and I almost died again, and you almost died, and-and..." Daria trailed off before grabbing Jane by her jacket and crushing her head to her chest. Jane could feel Daria shaking as she sobbed.

Jane quietly wrapped her arms around Daria and held her. "D-Daria," Tom said as he caught up to them. Jane sent him a glance that old him to stay quiet. "Is... is she gonna be okay?" he asked Jane. Jane was surprised by his concern. "I... I don't know," she replied.

"She almost died today, and she got the shit kicked out of her," Jane explained. "How would _you_ feel in her shoes?" she asked him. "I...I don't know," he admitted honestly. "Tom...give me your phone number, and she or I will call you when she's feeling better, okay?" Jane said. "Uh, sure. Hey, do you want me to drive her back home?" he asked Jane. "No, drive us to my place. I'll call her parents and let them know that she's staying with me," Jane said.

"Sure," Tom said. "Hey, you'll still be in this spot when I drive over here, right?" he asked Jane as she held Daria's sobbing form close to her. "Yeah. We'll still be here," Jane said as Tom nodded his head and ran back to Pizza King.

Line Break

Two hours later, Tom drove up to Jane's house. "I'm sorry again for taking so long to get out of the parking lot, but the police were taking statements from _everybody,_ " Tom said. "I know. You don't have to tell me a third time," Jane said as she looked at Daria's fatigued form sitting next to her.

"And... I'm sorry that I couldn't stop them from questioning her," Tom said. "Well, at least your story about her being frightened to death by the fight satisfied the cops," Jane said as Tom parked the car next to the curb. "Will you be all right from here?" Tom asked he looked back over his shoulders. "I think we'll manage," Jane said as she unbuckled her and Daria's seat-belts.

"You sure?" Tom asked. "Yeah, I'm sure," Jane said tiredly as she got out of the car and walked around to Daria's side to open her door. Tom rolled down his window. "Hey, Jane... I know that you'll probably want to keep me out of this but...I'd like to know what's going on. You have my phone number, so when you want to talk, you and her can call me. I usually get off work at eight o'clock on weekdays," Tom said.

"Thanks," Jane said. "Come on, Daria," Jane said as she tried to pull the girl out of the car. "Do you need some help?" Tom asked her. "No, no I can-" Jane stopped talking as Daria transformed into Birdy, but without using the modulator. "I'll walk us into the house, Jane," Birdy said as she climbed out of the car. Birdy walked over to the driver's side window. "Hey, Tom, right?" she asked him.

"Uh...yeah," Tom replied as he looked at this new girl wearing Daria's clothes. "Thanks for not running away from her," Birdy said. "Sure," Tom replied. "I'll make sure that one of us calls you later to explain things, but it won't be for a few days or more, just to give you a warning," Birdy said.

"Well, if you want, you could just explain things right now, or at least give me an abridged version of the story," Tom suggested. "Okay. Maybe you should come inside with us then," Birdy said. Tom nodded his head.

Line Break

Christella Revy paused stepping out of her car as her brown-haired chauffeur, Salamander, turned his head and adopted a concerned look on his face. "What's wrong, Salamander?" Revy asked him as he held an umbrella over her head. "Ondine...she's badly damaged," he replied. "She is... no longer operating," he finally said. "And she was such a cute girl," Revy said dismissively.

"You aren't worried?" Salamander asked her. "No. I'll have Gomez retrieve her body and bring it back to the lab before the end of the night. Besides, she can be rebuilt," Revy said. "But will she be the same Ondine as she was before?" Salamander asked curiously. Revy smirked. "I suppose we'll just have to find out, won't we?"

Line Break

"I'm a police officer from the Space Federation, and I'm tracking down criminals here on Earth. I had an accident a few months ago. Basically, Daria got caught in the crossfire and to save her life, I was forced to merge her mind with my body until a replacement body could be finished for her," Birdy explained. "Replacement body?" Tom asked from the chair in Jane's kitchen. "Yes. It's an organic body, not a prosthetic one, so the process is going to take some time to complete properly, otherwise it would age rapidly and die on her by the time she's twenty-seven local years old," Birdy explained to him.

"I see. So... she's using you as a... _host_ until that time?" Tom asked her carefully. "Yes, that's basically how it is," Birdy replied with a regretful tone. "It's my fault that Daria's in this mess, so once that body is finished, I'm going to un-merge us, and she'll be able to live her life her way again," Birdy said. Jane walked over and placed three cups of coffee on the table.

"Um... well, what will happen to you?" Tom asked her. "I'll resume my mission in the manner that works best for me. I'll be able to properly track down Christella Revy and her associates, and then I'll put an end to her illegal operations," Birdy said. "I'm not leaving Earth until I've stopped Christella Revy, even if it costs me my life. But that's why I'm waiting for Daria's replacement body to be completed, so that she won't get killed a second time," Birdy said.

"That's why I need help. From Jane and, if you're willing, you as well, Tom," Birdy said. "Him?" Jane asked her. "Why not?" Birdy asked. "We don't need to get more people involved than necessary," Jane retorted. "I think I'm already involved," Tom said.

"I mean, I already know about what's going on, so... I'll do what I can," Tom said. "Tom, all I really need you to do right now is support Daria and Jane, especially Daria," Birdy said. "Just help them when they need it and remind them that they aren't alone in this," Birdy said. "Now, I'm going to head upstairs and change back into Daria. She needs her sleep," Birdy announced as she walked out of the kitchen.

Jane turned to look at Tom. "Birdy's okay with you helping us, but I still think that it poses some risks," Jane said. "I'll keep my mouth shut, if that's what you mean," Tom said to her. "You should go home now," Jane said. "Right. Just, give me call if you need anything," Tom said as he grabbed his jacket and walked out the door. It was then that Jane looked at the table and realized that no one had touched the coffee she'd made.

She sighed before heading upstairs with her coffee. She walked into her room and saw Daria sleeping on her bed. Jane placed her coffee on a stand and walked over to her friend. She grabbed a blanket and pulled it over Daria's sleeping form. She then pulled out her cell-phone and called Daria's mother.

"Hi, Mrs. Morgendorffer? It's Jane. I'm just calling to let you know that Daria's staying at my place for the night. We... we've had really exhausting day. Um, call me back after you get this message. Bye," Jane said before hanging up the phone. She sighed and looked over at Daria's sleeping form on the bed. "What have we gotten ourselves into?" Jane asked as she held her head in her hands.

Ending Line Break

Ending Theme: Tengoku no Kioku, by Megumi Hayashibara.


	6. Episode 1-06: Friends Will Be Friends

**DARIA THE MIGHTY**

Birdy The Mighty is property of Studio Madhouse.

Daria and Beavis and Butthead are property of Glenn Eichler, Mike Judge and MTV.

Episode 06: Friends Will Be Friends

* * *

" _I somehow knew that you were there. Looking like you didn't care. I reached for the change in my pocket. I counted the change in my pocket,_ " played out over Brittany Taylor's radio as she got dressed for school. "I wanted to buy you a beer. I knew that you were somewhere near. The bartender said it's _o~okay!_ The bartender said it's _o~okay!_ " Brittany sang along with the song.

She was feeling...happy this morning. In fact, for the past three weeks, she had been feeling very happy, even after everything that had happened with Bacillus, her brother, Daria, and that robot at Pizza King. It had been over a week since the incident at Pizza King. Daria had been moping for a day or two, although Jane had done her best to try and help her cheer up again, as much as Daria could, anyway.

 _Daria's pretty lucky to have Jane at her side_ , Brittany thought as she tied her shoe laces. "I guess having friends by your side-ooh! Where did I put that CD?" Brittany exclaimed as she rummaged through one of her drawers to find a CD that her mother had given a long time ago.

"There you are!" Brittany exclaimed as she opened the jewel-case and took out the CD before placing it in her CD Player/radio. She skipped ahead to the fifteenth track. "Friends will be friends! When you're in need of love, they give you care and attention!" Brittany sang happily. " _When you're through with life and all hope is lost, hold out your hands cause friends will be frie~ends! Right till the e~end!_ " Freddie Mercury's voice sang.

Line Break

"Daria," Helen said, "Did you want some more cereal?" Daria looked up quietly at her mother. "No. I... I'm good. Thank you for the offer," Daria said quietly. Helen frowned at Daria's behavior. While she hadn't been a fan of Daria's usual sarcastic and anti-social behavior before, at least she knew that her daughter was mostly all right. Her behavior now, though, worried her.

Ever since the incident at Pizza King when two strange people wearing costumes wrecked up the place, Daria had been especially morose. Jane had explained to her that Daria had been caught between the two opponents and had almost been seriously injured, which had shocked the girl. Helen had believed Jane's lie.

For most of the week, Daria had begun to regress in terms of social interaction, and she had started to become unbearable to be around because of her miserable mood. Even Jane was beginning to show irritation with her. Helen had become concerned when she'd noticed it, but hadn't pried too much, while Quinn was concerned, but didn't want to show it outwardly.

"You know, Dara," Quinn began, "I can understand being shocked by crazy people breaking into restaurants, but this is just overdoing it. I mean, it's not like their wardrobe had been hideous enough to blind you or something!" "Quinn, that's enough," Helen warned. "But Mu~om! She's overreacting!" Quinn whined.

Line Break

"Hello?" Marionette asked as she answered her phone. She nodded her head in understanding. "How long until it's ready?" she asked. She nodded her head when she received her answer. "So, either by that date or before it, correct?" she asked. "Very well, I understand," Marionette said with a smile. "I won't let you down, Miss Revy."

Line Break

After breakfast, Daria had gathered her school materials when there was a knock on the front door. "Hello, Jane," Helen said as she opened the door. "Hey there, Mrs. Morgendorffer," Jane replied. "Is Daria ready?" she asked. "For school? Yes," Helen said sadly.

On their way to school, Jane did her best to try to raise Daria's spirits. "Daria, look, things are going to be okay," Jane said. Daria didn't respond. Jane sighed in frustration as she looked at her friend. "Daria, please. At least say something sarcastic or comment on something stupid," Jane begged her. "Please, this is getting tiring. You've been like this almost all week, and I can't take it much longer!"

"Jane...We're living on borrowed time," Daria said before she turned to look into her eyes. "Daria?" Jane asked. "Christella Revy knows who we are. Therefore, she also must know where we live and where we go to school. She knows who our friends are by this point, and at any moment, she could strike and kill us or them," Daria explained in a somber tone.

"Jane... I'm scared. I'm _terrified_ and I don't know what to do," Daria said. Listening to Daria's words, the full weight of the situation finally hit Jane. "We don't know where Christella Revy is hiding, so we can't strike on our own, and we don't know when the next attack from her will occur. Let's face it; We've got targets painted on us and we're just waiting for someone to pull the trigger," Daria said.

Jane grabbed Daria and slapped her across the face. "Dammit, Daria!" Jane shouted at her. Daria looked at her in shock. "Listen, maybe we are living on borrowed time, but we're not dead yet! We're still alive, so we can still do something! If you want to crawl into a hole and wait for Revy to find you, go right ahead, but I'm going to fight!"

"J-Jane-" "No! You have Birdy! You have the most power out of anyone to fight against Revy, and all you want to do is mope around!" Jane continued. "I'm sick of it, Daria. I'm sick of you feeling sorry for yourself! I know that you can hear me, Birdy! Talk some sense into this girl!" Jane exclaimed as she held onto Daria's shoulders.

"Daria, I know that you're afraid. I am too, but I'm not going to let that control me, and I'm not going to weep and moan over what almost happened instead of being thankful for what _did_ happen. We survived that fight at Pizza King. You survived whatever happened that night at the Zon. We survived Bacillus, and we survived Kerberos!"

Daria's eyes widened at Jane's words. _She's right. We're not dead yet. We almost died, but we're still alive. We can still live to fight another day._ **Damn right, Daria** , Birdy said. _Where have you been today?_ **Sleeping. It's the best way to avoid watching you mope** , Birdy replied.

 _I guess I have been rather unapproachable lately, haven't I?_ **Definitely. I understood your need for it the first day after the Pizza King incident, but you've been allowing your self-doubt and embarrassment to overwhelm you** , Birdy replied. "Jane, I'm sorry," Daria said. "For?" she replied. "For becoming the misery chick that everyone had pegged me to be when I first came here. And for not realizing that I'm not alone," she replied with a small smile.

"Of course you aren't alone. You have me, and Birdy, and Brittany, and Marionette, and even Tom, although he's in the 'stand there and say things to make us feel better' role," Jane said. "Even with everything you've said, there's still one problem," Daria said.

"Yeah?" Jane asked in response. "Where are we going to eat pizza until Pizza King has finished its renovations?" Daria asked her. "Oh, yeah. That's right, you guys really tore up the place," Jane said as she reflected on the situation.

Line Break

"Hi, Brittany!" Marionette said with a squeal as she ran up to Brittany in the hallway of Lawndale High. "Hey, Marionette! What's up?" Brittany asked. "Well, I was wondering if it'd be okay for me to spend some more time with you at your place tonight," Marionette replied. "Um, I guess. But tonight is still a school night. Wouldn't it be better to wait until Friday night?" Brittany replied.

"I'm not asking to stay the night," Marionette said with an almost imperceptible edge to her tone. "Alright, I guess it wouldn't hurt," Brittany agreed. "Sweet!" Marionette said excitedly. "So, how do you think those career aptitude tests are going to turn out?" she asked Brittany. "I don't know, to be honest," Brittany replied.

"Hey, look. Daria and Jane!" Marionette said. "Yeah, and Daria actually looks like she's back to normal," Brittany said. "Hey, Daria, hey Jane," Brittany said as she walked up to the them. "Hey, Brit, what's going on?" Jane asked. "Nothing much. So, Daria, are you feeling better today?" Brittany asked. "Actually, I am," Daria said with her Mona Lisa smile. "That's good to hear," Brittany said with a smile of her own.

Line Break

Mr. DeMartino held a stack of papers in his hands as he looked at the faces of his students. "All right. Here are the **results** of your career aptitude tests. Perhaps they'll help you avoid whiskey-soaked **decades** wondering what **might** have been if only you'd had the **guts** to follow your **dream** of a life at sea," he said as he began passing the test results back.

Marionette raised her hand. "Yes, Miss Zueltvandert?" DeMartino asked. "Um, I get sea-sick easily," she said. "Thank you for that **enlightening** statement," DeMartino replied sarcastically. "You're welcome!" Marionette chirped. "Con **grat** ulations, Miss Lane. You've done it again," DeMartino said as he placed her test on her desk.

Daria looked over at Jane's paper. "Accountant?" she asked her. "Yep. It's what happens when you answer 'C' for every question. It gets the whole test over in about five minutes," Jane said with a smirk. "You mean you didn't even try to answer the questions?" Daria asked her.

"Questions? What questions?" Jane asked her. "Hey, let's see what you got," Jane said as Daria flipped over her paper. "Mortician?" Daria said. "Don't worry about it. How much can they tell from a standardized test? I've had fortune cookies that were more accurate," Jane said in an attempt to console her. "It's okay," Daria said, "There are worse fates."

"Petroleum dispen... dispensation?" Kevin pronounced awkwardly. Then the words incorrectly clicked in his head. "Hey, I'm going to be an oil typhoon!" "That's _tycoon,_ " Brittany corrected him before she looked at his paper. "And that isn't what this means, Kevin. This refers to filling up people's cars. You're going to be a gas station attendant," Brittany explained.

"Oh," Kevin said. "Then again," Jane said, "Sometimes these tests can be absolutely uncanny." "So, what did you get, Babe?" Kevin asked Brittany. "My results say that I'll be...an information broker? Does that mean I sell information to people on Wall Street or something? Or do I trade insider secrets around in a vicious cycle, causing an economic collapse as multiple businesses panic and make the wrong choices with their stock because of false and/or outdated information?"

DeMartino stared at Brittany for a second in surprise. "Yes?" she asked him.

Line Break

"Huh, I guess I was wrong," Marionette said to Brittany as they walked to their next class together. "Wrong? About what?" Brittany asked her. "Kevin having a future in the porn industry," Marionette said. "I guess so," Brittany said with a chuckle, smiling at her friend.

Line Break

Later, at the Morgendorffer residence...

"Does anyone notice anything special about me?" Quinn asked everyone when she walked into the kitchen. Daria looked at her. "Yes. From just the right angle, I really can see through your head," Daria stated. "Daria, don't... Daria, are you feeling better?" Helen asked hopefully.

"Jane... said some things to me this morning," Daria said. "She... helped me put certain things in perspective," Daria finished. "Well, that's good. I mean, that's what friends are for, right?" Helen commented. "Mu~om!" Quinn whined. "Yes, Quinn. What are we supposed to notice, honey?" Helen asked as she turned her attention to Quinn.

"My neck! I got my career aptitude test results at school today, and they said I have a future as a neck model for jewelry catalogs," Quinn said proudly. "So your head would serve as sort of an accent piece," Daria commented. Birdy snickered internally. "I think it's wonderful that you're thinking about the future, Quinn, but you've got far more to offer than your neck," Helen said.

"Yes, what about the untapped potential of your shapely wrists?" Daria asked. "Daria, did you take a career aptitude test?" Helen asked her other daughter. "I don't remember," Daria said. "So I have to call the school to get your results," Helen said. "If you so choose," Daria replied. "Or maybe I'll just drop by in person, bring you a surprise snack for your lunch box, pop into class and give it to you myself," Helen subtly threatened.

"All right, all right," Daria said. "That's check and mate." "Smart girl," Helen quipped as Daria handed over her papers. "A mortician!?" Helen asked in surprise. "Hey, it's not my fault. Neck model was already taken," Daria said.

"Your lack of interest in personal interaction makes you an ideal candidate for working with the dead," Helen read out loud. "Daria, have you given any thought to your career plans?" she asked her daughter. "I guess I'll just wait around for people to kick the bucket," Daria replied. _Not that I have to wait very long with Revy in town_ , she mentally added.

"I can't believe you're not more ambitious," Helen said. "You want me to kill people to drum up business?" Daria asked sarcastically. "Daria, that is not funny, especially not with everything that's been happening around town lately," Helen scolded as Jake walked into the kitchen.

"Daddy, can I have some money for pictures of my neck?" Quinn asked sweetly. "Why, sure, honey! Pictures of your neck... great idea! I'll just run down to the bank right now and-" "Jake! You're not giving Quinn any money," Helen said firmly. "Can I still go to the bank for myself?" Jake asked. "Sit down, Jake," Helen said.

"But I need $500 to put together a portfolio," Quinn begged. "Quinn, if you want that kind of money, you can take a job and earn it," Helen said to her. "A _job?_ But the stress could put wrinkles on my neck!" Quinn exclaimed. "Heaven forbid," Daria snarked.

"Tell me about it. And if Quinn's getting a job, Daria, you can get one, too," Helen said to her other daughter. "I want you to get an idea of what the working world is about so you can take an interest in your future." "Can't I just focus on surviving right now?" Daria asked her.

"Daria, you'll being going off to college much sooner than your sister, so you should be more concerned about it," Helen said. "Only by a year," Daria retorted. "It says on this form that they have peer counseling at your school. Either you get a job, or you get some counseling to improve your people skills," Helen said as an ultimatum.

"Well, I guess counseling would take up less of my time, but then again, I'd rather not deal with Mr. O'Neil or Miss Manson," Daria commented. "Daddy, I don't have any work clothes. Can I have $500 for some new outfits?" Quinn asked her father. "Um, did anyone else hear the doorbell?" Jake asked as he got up and left the kitchen as fast as he could. **I think your father may be missing a few vertebrae, Daria** , Birdy commented. _Huh?_ **He's spineless**.

"Mom, what if I got a job for the summer instead?" Daria asked her reluctantly. "Daria, putting this off-" "I'd have more time to work during the summer than during a school week," Daria interrupted. "I... hmm, I suppose you do have a valid point. But I still want you to look at the process of submitting applications and preparing for interviews, okay? I want you to research available jobs in town and compare them with each other in terms of required skills, rate of pay, descriptions of what kind of work is involved and some company history, and I want you to tell me all about them as well," Helen said firmly.

"And if I don't meet these requirements?" Daria asked her. "It's a job with someone Jake does consulting for. Do you _really_ want that?" Helen asked her daughter. Daria sighed in defeat. "I see your point, Mom. I'll start doing some research."

Line Break

Meanwhile, at the Taylor residence...

"Wow, and that buffalo?" Marionette asked. "Technically, that's a Cape Buffalo. My dad shot him last summer on a hunting trip in Africa," Brittany said. "You know, those things are one of Africa's Big Five," she explained. "Big Five?" Marionette asked her. "The Big Five are the five most dangerous non-human species in Africa," Brittany explained.

"Ooh. What are the others?" Marionette asked her. "Let's see... Crocodiles, Lions, Elephants, and Hippos," Brittany said. "Wait... hippos? You're joking," Marionette insisted. "No," Brittany said, shaking her head. "Those things are among the most dangerous animals in Africa, and they frequently attack people without provocation."

"Huh," Marionette muttered. "Anyway, let's head up to my room. I have a photo album of some of the hunting trips I've been on," Brittany said. "Sure," Marionette agreed as she followed the blonde girl upstairs. As soon as they entered Brittany's room, Marionette slowly closed the door behind her. "Brittany," Marionette said carefully, "I actually want to talk to you about something."

"Oh? What did you want to talk about?" Brittany asked her. "Well, it's about Daria..." Marionette trailed off. "What about her?" Brittany asked. "Well, remember last week at Pizza King?" Marionette asked. "Yeah," Brittany said, eyes downcast, "I remember. I didn't really explain what was going on, did I?"

"No, but... I was hoping that I could get some answers," Marionette said timidly. "Well, you did see her transform, and you haven't really said anything to anybody about what you saw... I guess I can tell you what I know, although I really only know the basics," Brittany said. "That'll be enough," Marionette said appreciatively.

An hour later, Brittany was sobbing her eyes out as she recounted her story of the encounter with Bacillus. "He took his form! He just... like fishing bait, he used his form to lure me in, and I almost got Jane killed!" Brittany sobbed before Marionette grabbed her shoulders and pulled her into an hug.

"There, there. It's okay," Marionette said soothingly. "I-I miss him so much!" Brittany sobbed into her shoulder. Marionette began caressing her hair. "It's okay, Brittany," Marionette whispered. "I'm here. Everything's gonna be all right," she said reassuringly, before she grabbed Brittany's head and tilted it.

She looked into Brittany's eyes, setting her plan into motion. She leaned forward, and Brittany's eyes snapped open in shock. At first, she did nothing, but Brittany soon returned the kiss with equal fervor. _That's it_ , Marionette thought as she began to slowly push Brittany down onto the bed, _by tomorrow, you'll be a willing puppet, just like the rest._

Line Break

The next day, Daria and Jane walked into school, noticing that things were eerily quiet in the hallways. "Jane... does something seem wrong to you?" Daria asked as they passed several people in the hallway, none of whom were making any noise. Even Kevin Thompson was standing completely still with a blank look on his face.

Jane waved a hand in front of him, but got no response. "Okay... what's going on?" she asked rhetorically. Both girls continued wandering around the school, noticing that almost everyone was in the same blank and mindless state. "This is creepy, weird, and kind of scary," Jane commented as they entered Mr. DeMartino's classroom.

They had been hoping that he of all people might be unaffected, and they were right, but only because he wasn't in his room. After wandering the halls again, Daria and Jane found a janitor's closet with the door ajar. Looking in, they saw Mr. DeMartino, bound and gagged. His eyes were closed, and Jane checked him for a pulse. "He's alive, just sleeping, I guess," she muttered as she got up.

As they were about to untie him, they heard Miss Li's voice on the PA. " _Would Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane please report to the principal's office immediately?_ " "I guess we should go," Jane said reluctantly. Daria nodded her head in agreement as they both made their way to Miss Li's office, not noticing the number of people slowly trailing behind them.

Line Break

"Dammit, I can't believe I'm late!" Quinn cried as she busted into the school. "Why didn't I set that stupid alarm clock!?" she asked herself as she looked around the empty hallways. "Dammit, and class has already started, hasn't it!?"

Line Break

Daria and Jane slowly entered Miss Li's office, looking around before seeing Miss Li sitting in her chair with a blank look on her face, like all the others. "Um, Principal Li?" Jane asked. "She can't hear you." Daria and Jane both turned their heads to look at the source of the voice. "Marionette?" Daria asked.

Marionette was wearing blue jeans and a black shirt. "That's my name," she replied with a smile. "Marionette, what's going on?" Daria asked her. "Well, as you can see, everyone in the building is my puppet. Well, everyone except DeMartino. Too strong-willed, I'm afraid. Still, I think I might be able to control him in the future, so I've allowed him to live," Marionette explained.

"You... you work for Revy, don't you?" Daria asked. "Bingo!" Marionette said. "This whole time, you were working for the enemy," Jane spat. "Working for? Please, I _am_ the enemy!" Marionette retorted. "Wait... where's Brittany?" Daria asked.

"Oh, she's around. But, anyway, the fact is, Daria, you and Jane are just too troublesome to let live for very much longer. You have two options: join Christella Revy or die," Marionette said. "Not much of a choice," Jane said. "Well, the benefits are quite excellent, I can assure you," Marionette said.

"And if we choose a third option?" Jane asked. "There is no third option. You can willingly join me and work for Miss Revy or... you can watch helplessly as your friends and family are turned against you and kill you," Marionette said in a matter-of-fact manner. "What!?" Jane asked. "I _am_ the Puppet Master for a reason," Marionette said with a giggle.

"Just think about it! Once you're dead, I'll relinquish my hold on them, and then they'll wonder what happened, having no idea what they did! The drama and the angst will be _sooo much fun to watch,_ " Marionette said dramatically. "You're sick!" Jane exclaimed. "Eh," Marionette said, shrugging her shoulders, "I've been called worse."

"Now, Miss Li? Would you please show them the error of their ways?" Marionette asked in a sickeningly sweet tone as Angela Li pulled a gun out of her desk drawer and assembled it before retrieving a clip of ammunition from another drawer. Daria immediately transformed into Birdy and attacked, kicking the gun out of Li's hands before delivering a round-house kick to her face.

"Ooh! One down, and _hundreds_ to go," Marionette said smugly. "If I were you, I'd get into the hallway before it's too crowded," Marionette cooed. Birdy and Jane ran out of the office, while Marionette pulled out some sterile gloves from a pouch and slipped them on before she picked up Miss Li's gun and finished loading it.

Line Break

"Dammit, where do we go!?" Jane asked as they ran through the hallway. " _Attention,_ " Marionette's voice said over the PA, " _Will all students and faculty please kill Daria Morgendorffer, Birdy Cephon Altera, and Jane Lane? I would be ever so appreciative if you could complete this task. Thank you._ "

"What the hell!?" Birdy and Jane both looked into the hallway to see Quinn staring at the PA speaker outside of Mr. Deckard's classroom. "Quinn!" Birdy shouted as she ran towards the younger girl. "Huh? Wait a minute-you!" Quinn exclaimed as Jane and Birdy reached her. "You're the burglar!" Quinn exclaimed as she pointed a finger at Birdy's chest.

"There was no burglar, Quinn! I was just going out to investigate something that night," Birdy explained. "Who are you!?" Quinn asked, "And where's Daria?" "Daria's with me right now," Birdy said. Quinn looked around. "Where?" "Ugh, right here," Birdy said as she transformed back into Daria.

Quinn took a step back in surprise. "D-Daria? What's going on!?" Quinn demanded. "I'll tell you later, but first we need to get out of here!" Daria said as she dragged Quinn with her through the hallway. "Quinn, listen. Daria's sharing a body with an alien police officer from outer space," Jane said.

Quinn couldn't think of a response to something so outlandish. "It's true," Daria said as she transformed back into Birdy. "Now, when we get-uh-oh," Birdy said as they turned a corner and found their path blocked by dozens of students. "What's wrong with them?" Quinn asked as she saw the blank looks on their faces.

"Marionette has them under her control somehow," Birdy said. "Who? You mean that girl who's been hanging around Brittany?" Quinn asked. "Yes. She's actually working for Christella Revy, a criminal who I've tracked to this planet," Birdy explained. "I'm so confused," Quinn whined.

Just then, Jodie Landon, sporting a blank stare, lunged forward with a wooden ruler and tried to attack her. Birdy dodged the attack and kicked Jodie back. "Careful, Birdy!" Jane cried. "They might be attacking us, but they don't have any control over themselves!" "I know, but incapacitating them is the only course of action. I'll try not to cause too much harm to them," Birdy said as she cracked her knuckles.

"Jane, take Quinn and-wait, no. Just stay with me. We'll find DeMartino together," Birdy said. "He's involved too?" Quinn asked. "No, he's tied up in a janitor closet. Apparently he couldn't be controlled like the others, so Marionette had them tie him up and throw him in a closet," Jane explained.

Quickly, the Three J's rushed forward. Quinn stepped forward to try and stop them from attacking. "Guys, I need you to carry my books! Stop moving!" Quinn shouted. Even her presence couldn't break them from Marionette's control. "Don't touch her!" Birdy shouted as she kicked Jeffy in the head, sending him stumbling back. "Actually, I don't think they'll go after her," Jane said. "What makes you say that?" Birdy asked her curiously. "Marionette told everyone to kill you, me and Daria. She never mentioned Quinn," Jane explained.

"Maybe so, but I'd rather not take the risk," Birdy said as she ducked a swing from Joey and delivered an uppercut to his stomach, knocking the wind out of him and spinning around to kick him in the chest. He flew back into the crowd, knocking over two other students. Jamie White reached out for her and Birdy grabbed his arms before decking him. He fell to the floor.

"Okay, who's next?" Birdy asked as Ted DeWitt-Clinton rushed forward. She side-stepped him and judo-chopped him on the neck, sending him crashing to the floor quite easily. A guy with a green shirt who resembled Shaggy from Scooby-Doo rushed at her next, raising a fist. Birdy grabbed his fist and his arm, lifting them as she kneed him in the stomach. She then pushed him to the floor.

Birdy took care of the others quickly as the trio made their way to the closet where DeMartino had been bound and gagged. Jane quickly untied him when she removed an Exacto-knife from her pants pockets. "Come on, wake up!" she said. DeMartino began to stir. "Kevin Thompson remembered who won the battle of the Alamo!" Jane lied. DeMartino quickly blinked his eyes and tried to move.

"Uh, wha? What's going on?" he asked as he shook his head. "It's a long story," Birdy said. "Huh? Who are _you?_ " he asked her. "I'm Birdy Cephon Altera, and I'm a police officer from the Space Federation," she explained. Anthony DeMartino blinked in confusion. "I'm still sleeping," he said. "No, you're not. You're awake, and right now we're in danger," Birdy explained.

"We?" he asked before he noticed Jane and Quinn. "Miss Lane, and uh... who are you?" he asked. "I'm Quinn Morgendorffer," Quinn replied. "Morgendorffer?" "I'm Daria's cous-er, _sister,_ " she explained. "Why is that the only believable thing I've heard all morning?" DeMartino asked himself as he stood up.

"Okay, what exactly is going on?" he asked. "This morning, I came into work, and everyone's staring off into space. Then, oddly enough, all of the students arrive _early_ , and they all act the same way as my co-workers! Finally, that Zueltvandert girl arrives and walks around like she owns the place, telling people what to do before I ask her what's going on," DeMartino prattled.

"Then, when she says something about me being too strong-willed, she has the other students and faculty tackle me to the ground and beat me up. I'll tell ya, Barch has a mean right hook," he said. "I fought 'em off, but then McKenzie hits me right in the stomach, and I'll tell ya, that kid has an arm," DeMartino said.

"So, what will it take to make you believe us?" Jane asked him. "How about some evidence to support your claims?" DeMartino replied. "Okay," Birdy said as she transformed into Daria. DeMartino's mouth hung open in shock. "Is that proof enough?" she asked him. He closed his mouth and rubbed his eyes. "That's it. I've lost it. After all these years, I've finally lost it," he said quietly.

"No, I'm afraid that you're still quite sane," Birdy said. "Please. This is clearly a product of decades of stress finally taking their toll on me," DeMartino said sadly. "Jane, get some water and throw it at his face. "Got it," Jane said as she ran over to the nearest water fountain. She came back cupping some water in her hands before splashing it on DeMartino's face. He shook his head and looked at her.

"This is real, Mr. DeMartino," Jane said. He sighed. "So... what exactly is going on?" he asked them. "Everyone's being controlled by Marionette, who calls herself the Puppet Master. She's working for Christella Revy, a criminal scientist I've been chasing for some time," Birdy explained. "Um... okay," DeMartino said, unsure. "Then, what's up with you and... Miss Morgendorffer?" DeMartino asked.

"I had an accident while chasing one of Revy's associates. Daria was mortally wounded after getting caught in the crossfire, so I've merged her mind with my body until a replacement body can be completed for her. But, the process of building an organic replacement body takes time, and it isn't finished yet. Because of this, Daria has been experiencing things that she really shouldn't be experiencing at her age, and Jane here, being Daria's closest friend, has tagged along for the ride," Birdy explained.

"And Miss Zueltvandert... she's an associate of this... Revy person?" DeMartino asked her skeptically. "Yes. We didn't know until today, but apparently she's been spying on us the whole time and reporting back to Revy. Which also means that she knows what makes us tick and where to hit us," Birdy said. "So... every time that she said something stupid and annoying was an act? Just like Miss Taylor?" DeMartino asked.

"Not quite. Brittany's brother was killed by one of Revy's other associates, and Brittany learned about it after almost being devoured herself. That was when she stopped her bimbo act and became more... open about her intelligence. She knows about me and the business with Christella Revy," Birdy explained as she heard footsteps from around a corner. "Damn, I was hoping we would have more time to get out of here," Birdy said.

"Wait, we have the janitor closet full of brooms and other supplies. We're not helpless," DeMartino said with a grin as he grabbed a broom and handed it to Jane. He pulled out a mop and handed it to Quinn. "Eeww," Quinn said. "Hey, just where _is_ Brittany?" Jane asked. "Marionette said that she was around, but where?" Birdy asked as she saw several students and faculty heading their way.

Jane saw Miss Defoe, one of her favorite teachers, walking forward with a cutting knife in her hands. "Great! Now I have to beat up my favorite teacher," Jane said sarcastically as she held the broom in her hands defensively. "Well, we both get to beat up Mr. O'Neill," Birdy said as she saw Timothy O'Neill walking towards them with a ruler in his right hand. They saw Janet Barch behind him with a whip in her hands.

"Well, it's a good thing that I'm **defending myself!** No false aggravated assault charges for me!" DeMartino exclaimed happily as he saw Barch walking next to Kevin Thompson. "Oh... I have waited so long for a chance like this," he said to himself with a grin. "Um, where did Miss Barch get that whip?" Quinn asked. "Don't ask," DeMartino said. "I'm guessing that she and O'Neill will have some explaining to do after this is all over," Birdy said.

"What!?" Jane asked. "Barch and O'Neill are... oh my god!" "That's why I said to not ask," DeMartino sighed. "Aw, I have to beat up Mack?" Birdy asked as she saw Michael "Mack" McKenzie walking alongside Kevin Thompson. "Oh no," Quinn said as she saw Sandi, Tiffany, and Stacey walking toward them. "I really don't want to hurt Stacey," Quinn said. "What about the other two?" Jane asked her. "Eh, Sandi's earned it, and Tiffany... I don't know, but I'll think of a reason," Quinn replied.

"It'll be okay. As long as you don't ruin their clothes and makeup, I doubt they'll even care that you're hitting them with a mop," Birdy said. DeMartino almost chuckled at her quip. "Alright, Janet! Bring it on!" he yelled as he assumed a defensive posture and blocked her whip.

The Fashion Club rushed forward and Quinn had to knock Sandi upside the head with the mop while Tiffany fell over after Sandi crashed into her. "I don't get it," Jane said. "If they're only supposed to kill you and me, why are they attacking DeMartino and Quinn?"

"They're in their way," Birdy guessed as she jumped up and kicked Mack in the face before landing and crouching to kick his legs out from underneath him. "I'm really sorry about this," Jane said as she jabbed Miss Defoe in the stomach with the end of the broom before smacking her on the back with it. She was then pinned to a locker by Kevin. She kneed him in the crotch and forced him back before she stepped away and swung the broom at his head, knocking him into a locker before he slumped to the ground.

"Stacey, let go!" Quinn cried out as Stacey wrapped her hands around Quinn's throat and choked her. "Please, I don't... ack, help!" she cried before Birdy pulled Stacey away and punched her in the stomach, causing Stacey to fall over with a gasp. "Why didn't you fight back?" she asked Quinn. "I... Stacey's my friend! I didn't wanna hurt her!" Quinn replied.

They heard DeMartino grunt as he fell back and flipped Janet Barch over him. He quickly got up and kicked her whip away from her before she grabbed his leg and pulled him to the ground. He tried to get up as he felt a ruler whack his shoulder. "Aargh! Dammit, O'Neill!" DeMartino shouted. Birdy ran over and delivered a spinning kick to O'Neill's stomach before delivering an uppercut to his chin, sending him falling back to the ground.

Jane ran over and whacked Barch with her broom. "Dammit, there are more of them!" Jane cried as she saw another group of faculty and students heading their way. In front of the group was Charles "Upchuck" Ruttheimer III, along with Andrea, Mrs. Bennett, Burnout Girl, and Corey, the first boy to have asked Quinn out when she arrived in Lawndale.

"Oh, Corey," Quinn said. "You'll always hold a special place in my heart for being the first boy here to ask me out. You'll now hold a special place for being the first boy that I'm going to hit with this broom," she added.

"Upchuck?" Jane asked. "Oh... I'm going to enjoy hurting him," Jane said as the group advanced upon them. By the time the foursome had fought their way through the fifth group of students as they traversed the school, they were starting to feel worn down.

"Hey... I think we're near the gym," Jane said as she looked at the large doors. "If we go in there, then we'll have more room to maneuver," Birdy said as she pushed her way into the gym. As soon as the group entered the gym, they were beset upon by several students by the sides of the entrance. The group had managed to fend off their attackers, only to notice that there was a lone figure standing in the middle of the gym.

"Brittany?" Jane asked. Brittany turned around and looked at them. "Brittany, what are you doing here?" Jane asked. "She's been waiting for you," Marionette said as she walked over from a set of bleachers on the other side of the gym. "You know, I was getting kind of bored waiting here with only Brittany and these puppets for company, but now that you've arrived, the best part of our day can begin!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Birdy asked her. "Why, Brittany's tragic tale of revenge, of course!" Marionette replied happily. "Revenge?" Jane asked. "Yeah, what's she talking about?" DeMartino asked. "Well, if you _must know_ , around two months back, Brittany's little brother, Brian, was eaten alive by an alien known as Bacillus," Marionette replied. "Bacillus was a criminal, and Officer Birdy Cephon Altera's job is to hunt down and arrest criminals," she continued in a sweet tone.

" _But,_ " she said dramatically as she walked closer to Brittany, "Birdy didn't stop Bacillus in time. She was too busy spending her time going to school so that Daria Morgendorffer could pretend to have a normal life. If only she had gone on patrol sooner or had scouted the area, she might have been able to stop Bacillus," Marionette said.

"I didn't know that he was on Earth until the day after the attack," Birdy said. "Of course not, but it's your own fault for not doing your job! If only you had done your job, then poor little Brian Taylor might still be alive, and Brittany would be the bubbling fountain of happiness and annoyance that you all knew and loved, or at least tolerated," Marionette said. She looked over and saw the tears streaming down Brittany's face.

"Oh my, it seems that I didn't take _complete_ control of her faculties. I guess leaving part of her conscious wasn't such a nice idea," Marionette said. "What are you going to do to her?" Jane asked. "Well, remember how I said that Brittany was getting _her_ revenge?" "Yes, we do, Miss Zueltvandert," DeMartino replied.

"Do you know what _this_ is?" Marionette asked as she pulled Miss Li's gun out from a plastic bag behind her. "Is that a _gun?_ " DeMartino asked in surprise. "Why yes. Yes it is," Marionette said with a sly grin on her face. "Do you know who it belongs to?" she asked them. "Why, it belongs to Miss Li, of course," Marionette revealed. "I really am shocked that you of all people, Birdy, would leave me alone in a room with a weapon and not expect me to use it after I revealed myself."

"Of course, I did tell you to run into the hallway, so maybe you're less immune to my power than I thought. Then again, it's no fun if I take control and have you kill each other that way, so I thought I'd make things a bit more dramatic," Marionette said. "What are you planning?" Jane asked her.

"Well, _Brittany_ is going to kill you. And then, I'll relinquish my control over her and everyone else, and she'll either get arrested or kill herself in despair after realizing that she killed her friends!" Marionette exclaimed joyously. "And do you know what the best part is? Brittany is conscious enough to not want to do it, but her body is still under my command!" Marionette gloated.

"You... you bitch!" Birdy exclaimed. "Oh, moving up to swear words, are we? What a big girl you are," Marionette said mockingly. "Now, the show begins, but don't any of you move forward, because the gun is still in my hands, as is Brittany's life," Marionette said dangerously before placing the gun in Brittany's hands. She was still wearing her sterile latex gloves.

"No fingerprints but hers and Angela Li's," Marionette said with a small laugh. "I can't wait to see the news report on this." "You're a sick, twisted little monster. You know that?" DeMartino growled at her. "Do you think I care, Anthony?" Marionette asked him.

"I didn't give you permission to use my name," he growled. "These people didn't exactly give me permission to take control of them either, but I did anyway," she retorted with a smirk. "Revy's sick for thinking of a scheme like this," Birdy said. Marionette chuckled at this. "Actually, I came up with this on my own. Revy told me to eliminate you, but otherwise gave me free reign to use whatever scheme or strategy I wanted," Marionette explained. "Now, Brittany, please kill them."

"Brittany, don't do this!" Jane shouted. "I know you can hear us in there! Fight! Fight back!" Brittany unsteadily aimed the gun at Jane. Tears once again rolled down her cheeks as she opened fire. "Aah!" Jane screamed as she held her side. "Jane!" Birdy exclaimed as she rushed over to her side.

 _No! I don't want this! I don't want to do this! Please, Marionette, stop this! Stop making me hurt my friends!_ Brittany's cheeks and eyes twitched. Marionette snickered at Jane's plight.

"Quinn, DeMartino; get over here!" Birdy said as the other two rushed over. DeMartino held his hand firmly on the spot where Jane had been shot. "Quinn," he whispered, "Do you have a cell-phone with you?" "Yes," Quinn replied as she fished out her phone as carefully as she could.

Birdy stood up and turned to face Brittany and Marionette. "What did Jane do to deserve that!?" she screamed at the Puppet Master. "Nothing, really," Marionette replied. "Then why did you make Brittany shoot her!?" "I thought it would be fun," Marionette replied with a shrug. "You... I'm not arresting you, Marionette Zueltvandert," Birdy said with a tone of calm fury. "Actually, Zueltvandert isn't my last name. It's just an alias," Marionette said calmly.

"And your first name?" Birdy asked. "Oh, that's real," Marionette replied. "So, Brittany, are you ready to get your revenge? Go ahead. Shoot Birdy. Kill her," Marionette implored. "Go on. It's her fault that your brother's dead, so kill her. Or... since it's her fault that you lost a sibling..." Marionette trailed off as she spied Quinn speaking into her cell phone, "Make Daria suffer the way that you have."

"Don't you _**dare!**_ " Birdy roared. Marionette simply smiled. "Why not? Then both girls can cry over their dead siblings, and in the heat of the moment, kill each other to make things even! Oh, what a lovely tragedy!" Marionette exclaimed while clasping her hands dramatically.

Brittany shakily held the gun as she aimed it at Quinn. _N-No! No! I won't do this! I won't do this!_ Slowly, her shaking hands began to lower the gun. Marionette saw this and frowned. "Brittany, I didn't tell you to back down. Kill her," Marionette said, confused by this turn of events.

"Brittany," Marionette said with a hint of annoyance, "Do as I say. Kill her. In fact, kill them all," Marionette said. "Come on, do it!" she began to growl at Brittany. _No! I-I won't do it! I won't be your puppet!_ "Brittany, why aren't you doing it? Brittany, kill them! Kill Birdy! Kill Jane! Kill Quinn and DeMartino! _Kill them!_ " she screamed at Brittany. "Brittany!" Birdy exclaimed in excitement.

Brittany's lips curled and she began to turn her head to glare at Marionette. "Y-Y-You... won't... h-hurt... them," Brittany tried to speak. "Brittany, give me the gun. I'll do it myself," Marionette ordered as she held her hand out. "You... want... the... gun?" Brittany asked her. "You... c-can..." She slowly began to turn and raised the gun. "... have it!" Brittany screamed as she unloaded into Marionette at point-blank range.

Marionette staggered back, her eyes wide in shock at Brittany breaking her control. "I... I don't... how?" she asked through ragged breaths. "You used me! You made me think we were friends! Then you took advantage of me!" Brittany cried as she fired again, hitting Marionette in the stomach.

"B-Brit... please! What about last night?" Marionette asked as she held her stomach and looked at Brittany with a pleading smile. "W-When we... made love? I-I made you feel so good. I showed you... love. Why... why would you-" "Shut up!" Brittany screamed at her. "You _used me!_ "

"You used me as your puppet! You _**never**_ loved me! You... You just saw me as a tool!" Brittany screamed as she emptied the rest of the clip into Marionette, who finally fell back against the gym floor. Brittany kept squeezing the trigger, only to hear clicking. Tears swam down her face as she finally collapsed onto her knees and began sobbing. She lowered the gun to the floor and held her head in her hands as violent sobs wracked her body.

Birdy approached her and held her close. "I'm so sorry," she whispered to the girl. She turned her head to look at the others. "Quinn! Did you get a hold of the police and paramedics!?" Birdy shouted. "Yes!" Quinn replied. Jane winced and gasped in pain as DeMartino kept his hands firmly on her wound. "You can let go of her now," Quinn said to him.

"No. We have to keep pressure on the wound! Dammit, she might be going into shock," DeMartino exclaimed. "Birdy, or whoever you are, turn into Daria and give me her jacket!" DeMartino demanded. Birdy jumped up and transformed back into Daria before rushing over and taking off her jacket, handing it to DeMartino. He folded it and put it under his hands.

"What happened?" one of the students asked as Marionette's control wore off. "Hey, what's going!?" another student asked as they saw Jane. "Give me your jackets, or shirts! Something, we need to keep her warm!" DeMartino shouted.

When the Paramedics finally arrived, Jane was immediately taken into the ambulance and rushed to the hospital, with only Daria joining her in the vehicle. She had told Quinn to stay behind and call their parents.

During the ride, Daria held one of Jane's hands tightly as she looked at her friend while the ambulance drove on. "Jane..." she whispered fearfully as tears began rolling down her cheeks. _Please, Jane, live! I-I can't do this without you._

To be continued next episode...

Ending Line Break

Ending Theme: Last Kiss by Bonnie Pink


	7. Episode 1-07: Once More Unto The Breach

**DARIA THE MIGHTY**

Birdy The Mighty is property of Studio Madhouse.

Daria and Beavis and Butthead are property of Glenn Eichler, Mike Judge, and MTV.

Episode 07: Once More Unto The Breach

* * *

The ambulance ride to Cedars of Lawndale was nerve-racking for Daria as she held Jane's hand tightly. She silently begged her friend to hold on. "Please, Jane," Daria said with a cracked voice, "Don't die on me. I need you."

As soon as the ambulance arrived, Jane was moved from the vehicle and wheeled through the hallways into the emergency room, and Daria was not allowed past those doors. "Sorry, kid, but medical staff only," the security guard said with a firm, yet slightly sympathetic tone. "But... I-she... she's..." "I know it's hard, but the doctors have to be able to work without anyone distracting them," he said.

"Will she be all right?" "That's not my jurisdiction. I'm sorry, but I can't tell you something that I know nothing about," he said. "I'll call someone to escort you to the designated waiting area," he said as he grabbed his walkie-talkie. Daria just slumped against the wall as she looked up at the ceiling.

Line Break

"Jesus Christ," Detective Goldsmith said as he looked at the body on the floor of the Lawndale High gym. "Do we have a name?" Goldsmith asked Sergeant Kenner. "According to everyone who knew her, her name is- _was_ Marionette Zueltvandert," Kenner replied as he looked over his notes. "Uh-huh, and our little shooter over there?" Goldsmith asked as he looked at the blonde-haired girl sitting on the bleachers, next to one of the teachers.

"Her name is Brittany Taylor," Kenner said. "Hmm. Any idea what happened?" Goldsmith asked him. "Well, your partner is looking at the school's security footage right now. You could go join him. He's in the security room located next to the principal's office," Kenner said as another officer took photographs of Marionette's lifeless body.

"What kind of statements do we have?" Goldsmith asked. "That's the strange part; no one remembers anything from after they went to bed last night, except that teacher, the shooter, and one other student, possibly three," Kenner replied. "What about the gun? Did she bring it from home?" Goldsmith asked. "No. It belongs to the principal," Kenner replied as he picked up the plastic bag with the gun inside of it.

"Okay then, I'll go find Horner," Goldsmith said as he made his way to the exit of the gym. He stopped at took a brief look at Brittany, who was sitting on a bleacher with her head in her hands. He shook his head and continued toward the exit.

He made his way through the hallways, looking at broken brooms and mops on the floor, along with what seemed to be a whip. "The hell?" he asked himself silently as he continued on his way to the principal's office.

Meanwhile, Horner was busy watching the school's security footage in confusion. "I don't get it... what were these people doing?" he asked himself as he looked at his notes. "Hey, Horner," Goldsmith called a few minutes later as he walked into the room. "Hey, Gold. Come check this out," Horner said as Goldsmith walked over.

"So, when did our shooter begin her rampage?" Goldsmith asked. "She didn't. Nothing in this footage makes any goddamn sense. There's even some footage from inside the principal's office, but I haven't gotten that far, as well as some footage from the gym. Right now I'm still watching footage from the hallways and the teacher's lounge," Horner said.

"And... what have you found so far?" "I just told you. Something that makes absolutely no sense without some kind of audio to go with it, and only the principal's office and teacher's lounge had audio with their video," Horner said. "Wonderful," Goldsmith commented sarcastically. "Geez, this equipment is pretty snazzy. Where the hell did this place get the funds for stuff of this caliber?" Goldsmith asked suspiciously. "The principal is apparently embezzling funds, according to the school's economics teacher," Horner replied.

"Well, with such an Orwellian security system watching everyone's every move, it's no wonder the girl went mad and took the principal's gun," Goldsmith commented. "Gold," Horner said as he reclined in the chair and looked at his partner, "This isn't some ordinary shooting. This is something completely new. We need witness statements and audio recordings to make any sense of it, and what I'm already seeing is just plain bizarre."

"How so?" Goldsmith asked him. "Well, aside from that one teacher being forcibly subdued by several students and faculty, no one moved a single muscle after arriving unless they went to the bathroom. Otherwise, everyone stayed at a specific location, and once the two girls arrived, one of whom is our second possible victim, everything changed," Horner said.

"I'm not following you. Could you try _showing me the video_ , perhaps?" Goldsmith requested. "Here, watch this," Horner said as he rewound the footage and began playing it from the beginning.

Line Break

Daria was sitting on a chair in the lobby when Helen arrived. "Daria!" Helen cried out as she ran over to her daughter. "Sweetie, are you okay?" Helen asked her. "Jane's the one who was shot," Daria said. "Daria, just what happened?" Helen asked her, concerned.

"Didn't Quinn tell you?" Daria asked her. "She told me that you and Jane left the school in an ambulance," Helen replied. Daria was silent for a few minutes. "Daria, please, tell me what happened?" Helen asked her. "I-I don't know how explain it without... sounding crazy," Daria said.

"What do you mean?" Helen asked her. "Brittany... she shot Jane." "What!?" Helen gasped. "But, not on purpose. She-she was used. Marionette... she did something to her," Daria said. "Who's Marionette?" Helen asked her. "About two months ago, just after Brittany's brother went missing, this new girl, Marionette, arrived at school," Daria explained. "She started hanging out with Brittany and eventually, today, she did something to Brittany; something awful, and turned her into her own little puppet."

"I... what do you mean?" Helen asked. _How do I explain with without revealing Birdy and the whole deal with Revy?_ **Daria, just tell the truth!** _No! She'll think I'm crazy, and I can't just transform into you right here in this hospital!_ **Then say something believable until you get home, and then you can tell her the truth** , Birdy suggested.

"Well, I think... I think she drugged Brittany or something. Everyone in the school was acting like a drugged up doll, doing everything that Marionette told them," Daria said vaguely. "What about Quinn?" Helen asked. "She arrived late, after me and Jane," Daria replied. "I... I didn't realize," Helen said.

"Marionette gave Brittany a gun... and then she forced her to shoot Jane, before telling her to shoot Quinn," Daria said. Helen's eyes widened in shock and disbelief. "What did Quinn ever do to her?" Helen asked. "I don't know. She told Brittany to make me suffer the way she did from losing a sibling," Daria said. "Do you mean Brittany or Marionette?" Helen asked. "Brittany. Her brother went missing over two months ago, and he hasn't been found," Daria replied.

"Well, what happened?" Helen asked her. "Brittany... Brittany fought back," Daria said with a pained smile. "She broke free from whatever Marionette did to her, and then she shot her. Mom, the entire time Brittany was forced to hold us at gun point, she was crying, like she knew what was happening, but couldn't control her body," Daria said.

"Marionette... called herself a puppet master or something before she was shot," Daria said. Helen was silent for a few minutes as she digested what Daria had told her. "Daria, you said that Brittany seemed... _drugged_ , right?" Helen asked her. "That's what it seemed like. I was close enough to see tears on her face, though. Like... she was just starting to regain control of herself, but not quickly enough," Daria said.

"I see. And Marionette... Brittany shot her?" Helen asked. "Yes. She used up every bullet in the gun Marionette gave her," Daria replied solemnly. "Daria, you also said that almost everyone else in the school seemed to be drugged up, right?" "Yeah. I can figure out Marionette getting close enough to Brittany to drug _her_ , but I don't know how she got everyone else," Daria said. "Was _everyone_ in the building drugged up?" Helen asked her.

"Almost. The only people who weren't when Jane and I arrived were Marionette and Mr. DeMartino," Daria replied. "Mr. DeMartino?" Helen asked. "Yeah. Jane and I found him tied up in one of the janitors' closets. When we arrived at the school it seemed deserted, until we found a few people just standing still and staring off into space," Daria explained. "Why did you check a janitor's closet in the first place?" Helen asked her.

"Jane and I were searching the hallways for other faculty, when we saw that the door of the closet was opened a little bit. We decided to investigate and that was how we found Mr. DeMartino tied up. He looked like someone had beaten him up too," Daria explained to Helen. "And then we heard Miss Li's voice on the PA system. She asked for me and Jane specifically. We went to see her because hearing her voice made us think that maybe she wasn't affected and could give us some answers," Daria said.

"And..." Helen asked. "She was just like everyone else. Marionette was in Miss Li's office, and then she started talking to us about her being a puppet master or something, and then she said something about joining her or being attacked by everyone. Jane and I decided to leave the building, but Marionette used the PA system and ordered everyone to attack us," Daria said, leaving out several crucial details.

"Daria... when the police ask you about what happened... you do realize that you'll probably have to tell them everything you just told me, don't you?" Helen asked her. "It's not like I'll have much of a choice," Daria said. "Daria, have Jane's parents been informed about her condition?" Helen asked her. "I don't think so. I don't know if they're even in the country right now," Daria replied. "What about Jane's brother?" Helen asked.

"Do you have your cell phone?" Daria asked her. "Sure, but what happened to yours?" Helen replied. "I don't know. I can't find it," Daria replied. "Here, tell me the number and I'll make the call," Helen said.

Line Break

"So... it would seem that Puppet Master made quite a mess this morning," Bogaros said as he watched the news report on the TV in Revy's lounge. "So it would seem," Revy said calmly. Gomez grunted. "This could pose a problem in the long run," Gomez said. Revy looked at him questioningly. "This is going to have police involvement, and someone will start looking into Marionette's history. Someone is going to start sniffing around here sooner or later because of this," Gomez said.

"I suppose I should have dispatched Bogaros instead," Revy said. "I would have made it quick and clean," Bogaros commented. "It's too late for that now," Gomez said. "I have no doubt that Officer Cephon will come after us with every resource at her disposal now," he added. "Well then, in the mean time, we proceed with the serum operation," Revy said.

"It's too soon," Gomez said. "No, it's the perfect time. Hikawa finished the serum yesterday and has begun production of it in massive quantities. He's currently overseeing the preparations for it at one of our warehouses. He should have the amount required within the next day or so. I have Salamander keeping an eye on Hikawa for now. Bogaros, I want you to remain here until I give you further orders," Revy said. "I understand," Bogaros replied.

Line Break

"You said that they seemed... drugged, correct?" Detective Horner asked Daria Morgendorffer as he sat across from her in the room where Jane was resting. An hour after Helen arrived, the doctors had reported that Jane was stable, and was being kept under watch. Two hours later, the hospital staff had given permission for family and close friends to see her after she had been moved to a recovery room. Detective Horner had arrived after Goldsmith instructed him to seek out the girls in the security footage.

Since Daria refused to leave Jane's side, Horner was forced to stay in the room while asking her some questions. Helen had also insisted on being present while Daria was being questioned which was going to make Horner careful with some very important questions that he wanted to ask.

"That's how it seemed," Daria replied. "Right, and Marionette... called herself the _Puppet Master_ ," Horner said, reading his notes out loud. "Yes," Daria replied curtly.

"Right. So, you and Jane arrived at school and found almost everyone in some kind of trance or drug-induced state, and then one of your classmates revealed herself to be the orchestrator behind this," Horner said before pausing for breath.

"And then she ordered everyone to attack you and Jane, right when your sister showed up late for school, and then you found a single unaffected teacher, untied him from the closet that he had been stuffed in, and proceeded to fight your way through the building in an attempt to reach safety," he said before taking another breath.

"And then, you managed to enter the school gymnasium and found one of your friends, Brittany Taylor, had been drugged in a peculiar way and was then given a gun by Marionette, who ordered her to kill you, Jane, and your sister... simply for fun. Miss Taylor managed to fight off the effect of the drug, but not before shooting Miss Lane. Miss Taylor then proceeded to shoot Marionette until the gun was empty, and broke down into a sobbing wreck," Horner stated.

"That's what happened," Daria said. "I see. Well, we're still going over the footage from the school's security system, so we'll let you know if your story matches what we see," Horner said, already knowing that Daria had lied to him. The mention of the school's surveillance system caused Daria to stiffen ever so slightly, but Horner caught it.

"Thank you. That will be all for now. We'll have some questions for Miss Lane when she wakes up. Tell me, where are her parents?" Horner asked. "Probably somewhere out of the country, and we called her brother before you arrived, but we don't-" "Janey!?" came a voice from the doorway as Trent Lane entered the room.

"Um, can we help you?" Detective Horner asked him. "I'm Trent Lane. I'm Janey's older brother," he said. "I see. Um, how long ago did you receive the call about your sister?" Horner asked him. "I got the message on the answering machine after I woke up," he replied in a somewhat hostile tone. He'd never really gotten along well with authority.

"You were asleep?" Horner asked him. "Yeah, I was up all night rehearsing for a gig at The Zon," Trent replied. "Rehearsing?" Horner asked. "He's in a band," Daria said. "Oh, I see. Um, Mr. Lane, you wouldn't happen to know the whereabouts of your parents, would you?" Horner asked him. "No. They haven't been home for nearly four months. So, it might another two months before they come back," Trent said.

"What? Do you know where they were heading?" Horner asked him. "I think they left a note on the fridge the last time they were home," Trent said. "Well, as soon as you get home, you need to call them and let them know what's going on," Horner said as he got up to leave. "Oh," Horner said, pausing to turn around, "He's my number in case there's anything else you may want us to know." He handed a card to Daria and Helen before turning around leaving the room.

"Damn," Trent said as he walked over Jane's side. "What happened to her?" he asked Daria. "She was shot," Daria said. "What!?" Trent asked. "It's a long story," Daria told him. "Um, she's my sister. I wanna know what happened," Trent demanded. "Alright," Daria said as she started talking.

Line Break

Hikawa looked at the vats being filled with his serum before checking his watch. "Two containers full, and another ten to go," he said with a smirk. He looked at the bare skin between his jacket and his glove. He quickly covered it up.

"Hikawa," Salamander said, "There's been an incident with Puppet Master." "What about her?" Hikawa asked. "She's been killed," Salamander said sadly. "I told Revy to let _me_ handle the Federation officer," Hikawa commented. "She was killed in public," Salamander said. "Officer Cephon showed herself in public again?" Hikawa asked.

"No. She wasn't killed by Officer Cephon. She was killed by one of her puppets, it would seem," Salamander said. "Say that again," Hikawa said. "One of her puppets, broke free from her control and killed her," Salamander explained. "Hmm, interesting," Hikawa murmured as he went back to watching the progress of the operation.

"Tell me; do we know if Officer Cephon was killed?" Hikawa asked. "We don't know yet," Salamander replied. "I see. Well, even if she survived, she won't be able to stop us. After all, she doesn't know anything about our plan," Hikawa said.

Line Break

"Trent?" Helen asked, "What kind of insurance does your family have?" "Uh... I don't really know," he replied. "I see. Is there any way to find out, aside from asking your parents, who... are not available right now?" Helen asked him. "I think... there might be something in the house," Trent said. "Would you be willing to go get it, or would you like me to do it?" Helen asked him.

"Um, it might be best if I do it, but... I don't wanna leave Janey alone," Trent said. "I'll be here with her," Daria said. "Daria, you can't stay here all-" "I'm not leaving until Jane wakes up, and that's final," Daria said firmly. "Very well. I'll go home and bring some things here for you to stay overnight. Tomorrow _is_ Saturday, so you won't have to worry about school tomorrow," Helen said as she stood up.

 _School_ , Daria thought. _What the hell am I going to say to everyone at school? How am I going to explain what happened to everyone at school?_ **Daria...I honestly don't have an answer for that one** , Birdy said. _That isn't the worst part, Birdy_ , Daria started. _That detective said that they would be checking the school's security footage. Given how extensively Miss Li has the school fit with cameras, it's only a matter of time before the police find footage of us transforming_ , she finished.

 **Well then, tell your family as soon as possible, and prepare to tell them the truth. You cannot avoid this, Daria. Either the police will show the footage to your parents and try take you away for interrogation, or you can tell your parents about it before things become complicated. Time is running out, Daria, and the incident with Marionette only proves it** , Birdy said.

"This sucks," Daria said. "I know what you mean," Trent said as he looked at her. "So... what's gonna happen to that Brittany girl?" Trent asked. "She shot my sister, but you said that she was, like, drugged by that other girl," Trent said. "Yeah. Marionette seemed so friendly when we first met her. This morning at the school, we saw a side of her that we'd never seen before, but the scary part is that her personality hadn't changed at all. I could still recognize her as the same person, even when she ordered everyone to kill us," Daria said with sadness.

"Brittany... trusted her. Marionette abused that trust, and then she got killed for it," Daria said as she remembered Brittany shooting Marionette. _Marionette said that they'd... made... oh dear god. Brittany... she was used in one of the worst ways possible_ , Daria thought as she remembered Marionette's dying words and Brittany's shouts.

 _You_ _ **never**_ _loved me!_

"Marionette... used her as a puppet, just like everyone else," Daria said as she felt something wet around her eyes. "What the?" she asked as she reached a finger up and touched just below her eyelids. "Am I... crying?" she asked herself softly. _These tears... they aren't just for Jane. They're... for Brittany, aren't they?_

Line Break

Quinn Morgendorffer stared up at the ceiling of her bedroom. "School got closed early... for the worst possible reason," she whispered to herself as she lied on her bed. "I should call Stacey and ask her how she's... oh, right. Well, I guess I could still ask her if she's started remembering anything," Quinn said out loud.

As she was about to fish out her cell phone, she felt something vibrating in her pants pocket. She reached in and pulled out Daria's cell phone. _Oh crap! I forgot to give-wait, I never had a chance to to give it to Daria. She was already in the ambulance with Jane by the time I found it on the ground_ , Quinn realized.

She opened the phone and looked at the number calling it. "Who's Tom?" she asked as she pressed the talk button. "Hello?" she asked. " _Daria? Is that you?_ " "Um, this is Daria's cousin, Quinn," she replied. " _Cousin? I thought Daria said you were her sister,_ " Tom replied. "Okay, fine! I _am_ her sister. Anyway, who are you and why are you calling?" Quinn asked him.

" _Well, I'm one of Daria's friends, or acquaintances, and I heard about what happened at her school today. I wanna know if Daria and Jane are all right,_ " Tom explained. "Um, Daria is... **alive** , but Jane got shot, and she's in the hospital right now. Daria went with her in the ambulance," Quinn said.

" _Is Jane okay?_ " Tom asked, concerned. "I don't know. I haven't heard anything from anyone since I got home," Quinn replied. She heard the sound of the front door opening downstairs. "Quinn! I'm just here to pick up some things for Daria, then I'm heading right back to the hospital. Do you want to come with me?" Helen asked as she made her way up the stairs. "Hold on," Quinn said into the phone. "Could you say that again, Mom?" Quinn asked as Helen opened the door to Quinn's room.

"Daria's staying at the hospital to keep an eye on Jane. I'm taking some overnight stuff for her and I want to know if you'd like to come along," Helen said. "Well, I don't really know Jane that well, and I don't know if I have anything to wear for going to a hospital," Quinn replied.

"Quinn, this is no time to be concerned about fashion. Your sister's best friend was shot. At the very least, you should come along to wish her well," Helen reprimanded. "Yes, Mom," Quinn said. "Wait, is Jane alive?" Quinn asked her. "Yes, but she's sleeping right now. The doctors had to put her under while treating her wound," Helen replied.

"Well, I guess I can giver her cell phone to her," Quinn said. "You have her phone?" Helen asked her. "Yeah. Daria dropped it this morning during, well, you know," Quinn said. "Of course," Helen said. Quinn then remembered that Tom was still on the other end. "Hey, Tom, I'm going to head over to the hospital to see Daria and Jane for a little bit. She can call you then, bye!" Quinn said before hanging up the phone.

Line Break

"So, when do you want to question her?" Goldsmith asked Horner. "I gave her my card. She knows that we'll be seeing that footage again. She'll definitely try to keep it quiet, though," Horner replied. "Do you think you could try again tonight? I'd like to get some answers as soon as possible," Goldsmith said.

"I can try," Horner said. "Just go in the hospital and say that you're checking on the other girl, which you _will_ be doing anyway," Goldsmith said as he looked at the notes Horner had collected. "Wait a minute... Horner, do you think this case might be connected to that other investigation we've been doing?" Goldsmith asked.

"Huh?" Horner asked him. "You know, the brain experiment case. Do you think... since these people were clearly drugged or something, that the two cases might be related?" Goldsmith suggested. "Hmm, now that you mention it, I guess it **does** seem possible," Horner mulled. "I'll go ask that girl more questions, and then I'll look into the experiment case again," Horner said as he got up and left the office.

"Well, don't forget your car keys," Goldsmith said as he looked at the pair of keys Horner had left lying on the desk. "Eh, he'll be back."

Line Break

It was well into the night when Daria was woken by a light tapping sound. "Huh?" she asked groggily. "Hey," Jane said quietly. Daria's eyes shot open. "Jane!" she said as she went over and hugged her friend. "Hey, careful! I've got stitches," Jane said. "Sorry," Daria apologized as she pulled herself back. Jane looked over and saw Trent sleeping in a chair.

"So... anything fun happen while I was out?" Jane asked Daria. "Well, everyone was questioned by the police and... Jane, we forgot about Miss Li's surveillance cameras during the incident. If the police have watched that footage, then they've seen me transform into Birdy," Daria said quietly. "So... how long until they try to question you again?" Jane asked her. "I don't know," Daria replied.

There was a knock on the door as a nurse escorted the detective from earlier into the room before leaving. Detective Horner was quiet as he walked over to take a free seat. "Hello again, Miss Morgendorffer. Oh, Miss Lane. I see that you're awake," Horner said as he pulled out a pen and note pad. "You gonna question a shooting victim after she just woke up?" Jane asked him. "Well, there are some really interesting questions that I'd like to ask you. Both of you, in fact, and right now might be my only chance to do so," Horner replied.

"How much of the school's security footage have you seen?" Daria asked him. "All of it," Horner replied. Daria looked away from him and over at Jane. "Now... we're currently preparing to test the school's water supply to see if something had contaminated the drinking water," Horner said. "Um, isn't the school's drinking water connected to the rest of Lawndale's water supply?" Jane asked.

"Yes, but we've found that there's a special set of filters in place for the school's water supply, so we'll try to see if that was tampered with at any point during the week," Horner replied in a professional manner. "That isn't why you're here, though," Daria noted. "No, it isn't. The footage in the Principal's office had some audio to accompany it, so it's quite clear that the late Marionette Zueltvandert was responsible for the incident," Horner said.

"During our investigation, we've discovered that Miss Zueltvandert has almost no recorded history prior to attending school two months ago. We can't find any birth certificates or Social Security records that match her name. Now, what do the two of you know about her?" Horner asked them. "Very little. She was outgoing and annoying, and..." "An associate of someone you mentioned while in the Principal's office. A Revy?" Horner asked.

"She's a scientist who's been conducting illegal experiments," Daria replied. "I see. Do you know if she has any affiliation with someone named Hikawa?" Horner asked. "Who?" Jane asked him. "Never mind. Anyway, in Principal Li's office, you did something that... shouldn't be possible," Horner said as he looked at Daria.

"Who are you, really?" Horner asked her. "I already told you. I'm Daria Morgendorffer," Daria replied firmly. "Okay, and that other person, with the strange outfit and hair?" Horner asked her curiously. "Her name... maybe you'd better speak to her," Daria said. "Daria, what are you doing?" Jane hissed. "Trust me," Daria said as she transformed into Birdy, without the use of the modulator.

Horner's eyes widened in shock at seeing the transformation up close. "My name is Birdy Cephon Altera. I am an officer of the Space Federation, and any questions you have regarding my duties will be addressed directly to _me_ ," she said with narrowed eyes. "Okay. Um, how are you... sharing a... body with..." Horner trailed off, not sure how to ask. "You may wish to record this so that I don't have to repeat myself later," Birdy said.

"S-Sure," Horner said as he retrieved a recorder and his phone. "Go ahead," he said after getting his recording devices set up. "Shortly after I arrived on Earth, I was chasing a criminal named Giga. During the chase, I had an accident, whereby I accidentally mortally wounded Miss Morgendorffer. To save her life, I took her to my shuttle, the whereabouts of which shall remain undisclosed until I am ready to leave this planet, and I merged her mind into my body. I am capable of re-configuring my cell structure to match hers so that she can attempt to live a normal life while I continue performing my duties," Birdy explained.

"And before you ask, there is a replacement body being grown for her, but it won't be finished for another few months. Since it's an organic body, the process must be done slowly and methodically, to prevent unwanted rapid aging of the cells. After the body is finished, I'll transfer her mind to it, and she can truly live a normal life again while I continue my duties without restraining myself," Birdy explained.

"And this... Revy person?" Horner asked. "A scientist who went rogue some decades ago. I've been tracking her ever since I joined the Federation Police. She's currently on Earth and is responsible for much of the destruction that's occurred in the past few months. The incident at Pizza King the other week was her testing out one of her combat machines," Birdy said.

"And the incident at the school?" Horner asked her. "She told Marionette to kill me, Daria, and Jane, but gave her carte blanche to do it however she wanted. And for the record, Zueltvandert was just an alias that the girl was using. I don't know her true last name," Birdy said. "So... why the Taylor girl?" Horner asked. "Brittany's brother... was killed by one of Revy's associates, and Marionette tried to convince Brittany, who was _already_ under her control, that since I wasn't able to prevent his death, it was therefore my fault that he died," Birdy explained.

"I'm not sure I understand," Horner said. Birdy sighed. "I'm a police officer. Christella Revy and her associates are criminals. The associate who killed Brian Taylor was a sadistic bastard named Bacillus, whose true form is an amorphous blob, but is capable of using other people's body's as solid hosts for a period of time while absorbing other material. He was killed when Brittany set him on fire."

"Brittany... Taylor, you mean?" Horner asked. Birdy nodded her head. "How did she..." "After hearing Brittany's description of what was found at the scene where her brother disappeared, I realized that Bacillus was in Lawndale. Brittany was planning to search for him on her own, and to keep her from being attacked, I convinced Daria and Jane to join her that night," Birdy explained to him.

"When we came across Bacillus, he used the form of Brittany's brother to lure her into a trap, but Jane and I were able to fend him off. He returned later and while we had retreated to a motor shop, we were able to use a container of kerosene to set him on fire, killing him for good," Birdy said. "I had transformed into Daria and back in front of Brittany, so I had to explain the situation with Revy to her as well," Birdy added.

"I didn't know that Bacillus was on Earth until the day after Brian had been killed, but Marionette used my letting Daria live a normal life as the reason I wasn't able to find out sooner. She... didn't control Brittany as thoroughly as the others, because she wanted to make things dramatic. After forcing Brittany to shoot Jane, she then tried to make her shoot Quinn, who was helping that teacher keep pressure on Jane's wound," Birdy said.

"Marionette wanted Daria to suffer, and not for personal reasons, but for the sheer fun of it. She was a sick, twisted little bitch." Birdy said contemptuously. "And that was when Miss Taylor managed to break free from Marionette's control?" Horner asked. "Yes. She turned the gun on Marionette and shot until the gun was empty. Then... she just broke down and cried," Birdy replied sadly.

"Miss Lane, does this match your memory of this morning's events?" Horner asked as he turned to look at Jane. "Yeah, pretty much, although if I'd been awake and said this earlier, you people would call me a lunatic," Jane replied. "Um, what will happen to Brittany?" Birdy asked Horner. "We don't know yet, but given that everyone's statements all seem to point at the... Marionette girl being the orchestrator of what happened, I think Miss Taylor might avoid being sentenced by a judge. She was, after all, forced into this against her will after being drugged, correct?" Horner asked Birdy.

"I think so. But... I don't know exactly how Marionette was able to control everybody. They may indeed have been drugged through some means, but I was never able to find out. Marionette simply called herself the Puppet Master and neglected to elaborate any further except when explaining her plans for having Brittany shoot us," Birdy said.

Line Break

" _-except when explaining her plans for having Brittany shoot us._ " Goldsmith rubbed his eyes tiredly. "Is this real?" he asked Horner. "I was able to record some footage with my phone, and capture her turning back into that Morgendorffer girl," Horner replied. "So... what the hell do we do?" Goldsmith asked. "We go with the official story about that Marionette girl tampering with the school water supply with some experimental drug. All footage and witness testimonies support that much at least," Horner said.

"But what about motivation?" Goldsmith asked. "The... Officer Birdy said that Marionette was working for a scientist named Christella Revy. And this Revy woman may be involved in that other case as well. This goes much deeper than we thought," Horner said. "Okay, but what about the official public statement? We can't just say that an alien scientist paid some heartless teenage girl to dump drugs into the drinking water of a local school," Goldsmith said.

"We'd be committed faster than you can blink," Goldsmith added. "We don't know for sure that Marionette was a teenager. She may have been older than she looked, and we still can't find any records of her anywhere prior to her enrollment at Lawndale High," Horner said as he reclined in his chair. "Not even dental records," he said in frustration.

"Now, I trust that you have more of this... interview recorded, right?" Goldsmith asked Horner with a raised eyebrow. "Yeah. I have another forty-five minutes of audio on my second recorder. I also have some questions answered by that Lane girl, but we agreed that she would give me the official version of events," Horner replied. "Good. Does this... Birdy person explain more about this... Christella Revy person?" "Yeah, but not enough to help us find her. She hasn't been able to locate her in the time that she's been on Earth," Horner replied.

"Wow, she's as bad at finding things and people as we are," Goldsmith said ruefully. "Yeah, but we should still look into finding this Revy woman," Horner said. "Let's focus on this first," Goldsmith said. "Now, how the hell do we explain anything to the public, and what do we do about the security footage?" Goldsmith asked.

Line Break

Saturday...

Daria outside of the hospital. Jane had insisted that she get some fresh air and talk to her family, and Daria had reluctantly agreed. Jane had insisted that she would be fine, especially since Trent was still there with her. While walking home, Daria saw a familiar blond man wearing a green suit with sunglasses.

 **Hey, it's that guy!** Gomez was standing near a street corner and looked at Daria for a few seconds before turning around and slowly walking away. Daria quickly gave chase and followed him. Eventually, he made his way to the junkyard where Birdy's ship was hidden.

Daria quickly transformed into Birdy, but forgot to use the modulator. As she scoured the junkyard, Gomez quickly caught her from behind. Birdy fought her way out of his grip and spun around to face him, only to receive a punch in the gut. Gomez pushed her against the side of a broken forklift. Birdy looked up at him as he stood still.

She was about to charge when he held out his hand. "Wait," he said gruffly. "Officer Cephon, please, let me speak," Gomez said. "Why should I?" she hissed at him. "Because I only have a short amount of time, and if you don't listen to me, then everyone in this town will be dead by tomorrow," Gomez said. Birdy raised an eyebrow skeptically.

"One of Christella Revy's newest associates, an Earth scientist named Seichiro Hikawa, has been developing a super soldier serum. Despite warning him to be methodical and slow, he has rushed it, and while he believes his current version of the serum to be ready, I don't trust his judgement," Gomez said. "What are you talking about?" Birdy asked him as she tried to stand.

"Surely you remember the night you fought that man in Lawndale's business district," Gomez implored. "Yeah. I remember you especially," Birdy spat. "The serum that turned that man into a monster is the same serum that Hikawa has been working on. It wasn't ready then, and it isn't ready now, but he's pushing ahead with his plan to dump it into Lawndale's water supply and use the whole suburb's population to test it," Gomez said.

"Yeah? And why should I believe you?" Birdy asked him. "I already told you. I don't have much more time, and if I don't arrive to meet Hikawa soon, then Revy will become suspicious. You must have a tracking device of sorts stored in your ship, I hope?" Gomez said to her. "I do, but-wait... are you offering to lead me to Revy's hideout?" Birdy asked him.

"No, just Hikawa's location, where he's mass producing the serum and preparing it for transportation. The operation will be ready tonight, but Hikawa has rushed things. His serum won't revert people back to their normal states properly, and he won't listen to any criticism anymore, since Revy has given him the go ahead," Gomez continued. "You're Revy's loyal lap dog, so why would you want to stop a plan that _she_ has approved of?" Birdy asked him.

"I'm loyal to Revy, yes, but if Hikawa's plan goes ahead, then an incident this large will attract more attention than necessary, _and_ it will cost hundreds of thousands of lives. I'm doing this to keep Revy hidden from Federation forces a bit longer, and also to prevent a greater loss of life. I prefer laying low and waiting things out. It's worked for me before, and until Revy started sending people your way, it worked for her too," Gomez said.

"It's your choice, Officer Cephon. I won't lead you to Revy, but I will give you a chance to save lives. Take it or leave it. You have nine minutes before I need to leave," Gomez said gruffly. "Fine. Just let me go to me ship and get the tracking bug. I trust you'll still be here when I return?" Birdy asked. "Only if you arrive before the nine-" he checked his watch, "I'm sorry, make that _eight_ minutes are up."

Birdy quickly ran for the car pile hiding her ship and went inside to retrieve the most discrete tracking device she had. She quickly exited her ship and ran back to Gomez, giving it to him before he hid it in his suit. "Now, I need to get going. If I stop and buy something to drink, I may be able to have a backup excuse in case I arrive tardy, but depending on if Hikawa questions me, I may tell him that you're still alive, so he might have something waiting for you when you arrive," he said. "Wait... what's your name, anyway?" "My current alias is Gomez," he replied as he left the junkyard.

 _Birdy, can we really trust him?_ **Right now, we don't have a choice. Last night, that detective mentioned the name Hikawa, and that's the same name as this guy that Gomez wants us to stop. I wouldn't be surprised if one of their cases was something involving Revy and her associates, which means that Gomez may be telling the truth** , Birdy replied.

 _It still seems like a trap_ , Daria noted. Birdy quickly transformed back into Daria as they began walking back to the hospital. " **Gomez said that he won't lead us to Revy, and I think he's loyal enough to her that I'll believe that. And, it does make some sense, actually** , Birdy commented.

"Really? How so?" Daria asked quietly. **If Hikawa's serum isn't ready and the entire population of Lawndale is affected, it** _ **will**_ **get the attention of the news and even other Federation forces. Just as well, if I investigate and report my findings, then the Federation may decide to send reinforcements and even begin paying more attention to Earth, increasing the chances of Revy finally being caught. Gomez is trying to protect her by having** _ **us**_ **prevent a mess that could lead more Federation forces to Earth**.

"That... makes _some_ sense, but how do we know it isn't a trap to lure us out, or even one to get us away from Jane?" Daria asked quietly as she approached the hospital. **Unfortunately, there's no way of really knowing unless we go along with it** , Birdy admitted. "If we leave Jane alone, then one of Revy's goons could show up at try to kill her, and we wouldn't be able to stop it," Daria muttered worriedly.

 **Then we'll have to discuss this with Jane** , Birdy responded. **Besides, how could they possibly know if Jane is alive or dead?** "Good point," Daria admitted. **Even though Gomez knows that** _ **we**_ **are alive, he has no way of knowing that Jane is alive** , Birdy pointed out to her.

Line Break

"So, let me get this straight," Jane said. "You think that this guy, who is the same guy that broke your arm a few weeks ago, actually wants your help to stop some mad scientist from unleashing some kind of super soldier serum into Lawndale's water supply. And he wants to you to do it because he wants to keep his hands out of it _and_ prevent some kind of big sensation that could get Revy captured if it gets linked to her. Is that about right?" Jane asked.

"Um, yeah. Pretty much," Daria replied. "Well... if he _is_ telling the truth, then _everyone_ is going to be in trouble," Jane said. "But, if we leave you here alone, we can't protect you," Daria said. "Daria... unless you told that guy that I'm alive, I doubt that Revy or anyone else is going to know that I'm alive until I walk out of here," Jane said.

"Still, I'd rather not take the risk. I almost lost you, Jane. I don't want to have it happen again," Daria said quietly. "Daria, you're not going to lose me. You won't let that happen. Besides, if he's right and you do nothing, then it _won't matter_ if you leave me alone because all of Lawndale will be exposed to this stuff," Jane said.

"Go for it," Jane said firmly. "But, Jane... what if-" "Daria _do it_ ," Jane said. "Get out there, find out if that guy was telling the truth, and kick that mad scientist's butt! I'll be fine. Trent is still here, although the nurses have to wake _him_ up when they come in instead of me," Jane said.

"I'll be going solo on this one, then," Daria said. "Um, Daria? You'll be with Birdy," Jane said to her. "True, but I meant that it'll be just us. There won't be another person to guard our back," Daria clarified. "That's true, unless..." "No. I'm not calling Tom and getting him involved in this kind of situation," Daria said. "Well, at least let him know what's going on," Jane said.

"Let who know what's going on?" Jane and Daria turned their heads to see Tom entering the room. "Tom? What are _you_ doing here?" Daria asked him. "I came to see you and Jane," he replied. "Why? Was I not supposed to?" he asked, confused. "It's fine, Tom," Jane said to him. "Daria just doesn't want to risk getting any more people hurt is all," Jane explained.

"I don't see how me visiting you in the hospital is going to get me hurt, but okay," Tom said in response. "No, what I mean is... Daria doesn't want you to get involved to the point where you get put in danger that way I often do. Not to mention the fact that Brittany... oh my god, Brittany! I forgot all about her!" Jane exclaimed.

"W-What happened to her?" Jane asked Daria. "I don't know if you were able to focus on what was going on, but Brittany broke out of Marionette's control and killed her. I don't know what happened after we left the school. Although, given that everyone believes that Marionette tampered with the school's water supply and deliberately drugged Brittany, it's possible that Brittany may end up not being sentenced as a criminal, provided you don't sue her," Daria said.

"I'm not going to take legal action against her," Jane said. "I mean, Marionette used her. She pretended to be her friend and then she turned her into a puppet to make her kill us! The twisted little bitch used and broke Brittany, as though she wasn't already suffering because of what happened to her brother," Jane said.

"Um, I'm kind of lost," Tom said. "What exactly happened to Brittany's brother?" he asked them. They proceeded to tell him about Bacillus and the fight with the archazoids, as well as the alien's death. "Wow. That, um, that's... damn. I don't get along with my own sister very well, but I would probably feel the same way if something were to happen to her," Tom said.

"You have a sister?" Jane asked him. "Yeah," Daria said, "I think her name is...Elsa?" "Elsie," Tom corrected her. "Wait, Daria... how do you know about his sister?" Jane asked her curiously. "He told me at Pizza King last week," Daria replied. "Oh," Jane said.

"So... back to where we left off, um, about the girl who shot you," Tom said. "Yeah, how's she handling the situation?" Jane asked. "I don't know. I haven't left the hospital since earlier today, and I wont' be leaving again for a few hours," Daria said. "Huh? Where are you going?" Tom asked her. Daria sighed. "I'm going to investigate a tip that some nut-job is planning to dump an experimental serum into Lawndale's drinking water. If it's true, then I'll stop the bastard's plans right then and there. If it isn't true, then I've been had," Daria said.

 _And in both cases, Jane will still be alone_ , she thought. **Daria? You could ask Tom what his schedule is for today** , Birdy suggested. _Why?_ **Why? What do you mean 'Why?' Daria, Tom can stay here and keep and eye on Jane tonight, you nitwit!**

"Tom?" Daria asked. "Yeah?" he replied. "I need you to stay here with Jane tonight while I do something," she said. "Okay. Do you wanna fill me in?" Tm asked her. "I think that Revy may be planning something big with Lawndale's water supply, and Birdy and I are going to investigate. We don't know if it's true, but we can't risk letting Revy or her associates get away with something that we could have prevented. I need you to stay here with Jane tonight," Daria explained to him.

Line Break

"Gomez," Hikawa said as he spun his chair around, "I was beginning to wonder when you'd show up." "I had some business to take care of," Gomez replied. "Oh? What kind of business?" Hikawa asked him. "I staked out the hospital and discovered that Officer Cephon and her host are still alive," Gomez said. Salamander had a look of mild surprise on his face.

Hikawa raised an eyebrow. "Really?" he asked Gomez. "Yes. The news reports stated that two students were taken to the hospital, and that one of them had been shot. I was hoping to determine which one was the victim," Gomez explained. "I see. Trying to make sure that we're prepared in case Officer Cephon survived and decided to strike back, I presume?"

"If that is how you wish to think of it," Gomez replied. "Salamander," Gomez said as he turned to face the android. "Has there been any progress in Ondine's condition?" "No. She is... permanently offline," Salamander replied sadly. "I am very sorry about your sister," Gomez said sympathetically. "Thank you for your condolences," Salamander replied softly.

Hikawa snorted. "She's only a machine. Revy can easily build another one," he said dismissively. "Hikawa, you just don't understand, do you?" Gomez asked. "Hmm?" Hikawa replied. "You're quite _insensitive_ to Miss Revy's affection for these droids," Gomez said. "Oh, I'll come around; don't worry about it," Hikawa said.

"So, how long do we have until your operation is ready?" Gomez asked him, changing the subject. "We have another few hours. One of the pumps broke earlier and had to be replaced, so we're slightly behind schedule," Hikawa said. "I see. I was under the impression that all of your equipment was high-end," Gomez replied. "It was only one pump. All of the other pumps are still working fine, so the delay is almost negligible," Hikawa said smugly.

Line Break

Daria closed the front door behind her as she made her way over to the stairs and up to her room. _Should I get a shower now, while I know the water is still safe?_ **Go for it** , Birdy told her. Daria entered her room and gathered some clothes before heading for the bathroom. **I see you aren't going to wear your normal attire** , Birdy commented. Daria had chosen blue jeans and a black T-shirt instead of a black skirt and mustard-yellow shirt.

"I'm just choosing something more durable," Daria replied as she looked at herself in the mirror before stripping down and entering the shower. Outside the bathroom, Quinn listened to the sound of rushing water. Thirty minutes later, when Daria exited the bathroom, she jumped in surprise as Quinn stood in front of her.

"Daria... are you okay?" Quinn asked her. Daria thought about Quinn's question. "I'm alive," Daria replied. "That isn't what I asked you," Quinn said firmly. "Quinn..." Daria noticed Quinn looking at her clothes. "Where are you going?" Quinn asked her. "Out," Daria replied.

"Back to the hospital?" Quinn asked her. "Maybe," Daria replied as she tried to move around Quinn. "Daria, please... tell me what's going on," Quinn demanded. "I don't want to get you any more involved that you already are, Quinn," Daria said. "Despite how much we both hate to admit it, you _are_ my sister. And... I don't want to see you get hurt the way that Jane or Brittany have been," Daria said reluctantly.

"I mean, I'll probably deny it if anyone asks, but there's nothing wrong with you... physically, anyway, and I'd rather have an annoying sister who's _alive_ than just the memories of a sister who's _dead_ ," Daria continued. "So, please, stay home and don't get involved any further. Please, Quinn," Daria asked her.

"What if Mom and Dad ask me where you are?" Quinn asked. "Tell them that I'm walking around town trying to figure things out and that I might stop back at the hospital to check on Jane," Daria replied. "Alright," Quinn said with reluctance. "I'll cover you. But, tell that girl, you know, the one who shares your body, to get a better outfit in the future. Her uniform is so gaudy and tacky!" Quinn said.

 **Oh please, as if** _ **she**_ **would know anything about pragmatism and agility** , Birdy commented. "She can already hear you," Daria said to Quinn. "Well, just... tell her to also make sure that you back home in one piece. Despite denying it... I do like having a sister, even if you are a weird geek, and I do love you in a way that only sisters are capable of," Quinn said.

 **Don't worry, I'll bring us both back alive and in one piece** , Birdy commented as Daria smiled at Quinn's admission. "She'll make sure of that. She has every other time we've done something dangerous," Daria said. "Okay," Quinn said quietly. "Go... do what you have to do," she said to Daria, who nodded her head and walked downstairs, leaving through the front door.

Line Break

"So," Birdy said as she checked her tracker, "This is the warehouse where Hikawa is setting things up." She quietly crept forward, being sure to stay in the shadows as she made her way to the entrance of the warehouse.

She slowly made her way up to one of the warehouse offices, where she found a map of Lawndale with a large red circle around the water treatment and sewage facility. "Damn, he _was_ telling the truth," Birdy said. **In that case, we need to get moving** , Daria pointed out to her. "Right," Birdy said as she walked around the table in the center of the room.

"Did you hear that?" Birdy asked, just as she heard a snapping sound after passing the table. She looked down and saw a string on the floor. "What the-" _**BOOOOOM!**_ The office callapsed and the floor gave way from the explosion, sending debris and chunks of wall, plaster, and cement down onto the first floor.

Birdy coughed before lifting a large chunk of debris off of herself and throwing it across the empty warehouse floor. "Son of a **bitch!** " she cursed loudly. _Well, Gomez did say that Hikawa would leave something for us after learning that we're still alive, didn't he?_

"So he was late, and Hikawa questioned him. Damn, his honesty is something to be admired, isn't it?" Birdy asked sarcastically. "Okay, we probably don't have much time, so let's get to the water treatment plant," Birdy said as she ran out of the warehouse.

Line Break

Hikawa smiled as the small squad of archazoids Revy had lent to him entered the treatment plant and fired several canisters of knockout gas into the various occupied rooms and offices of the building. The robots quickly took control of the facility and opened the main gates of the loading area for the truck to pull in.

Before he and Gomez exited their own transport, both men attached breathing masks to their faces. "Shall we?" Hikawa asked as he and Gomez prepared to enter the building.

Line Break

Christella Revy sat comfortably on the couch in her lounge while Salamander answered his phone. "Yes?" he asked. "I see. Thank you," he said after a minute before hanging up. "Miss Revy, Hikawa and Gomez have both enacted phase two of the operation and are preparing for phase three," Salamander said.

Revy smiled. "Good. Oh, have either of them seen our Federation friend yet?" Revy asked. "I was not informed of any encounters with her during the operation," Salamander replied. "I see, so perhaps Gomez mistook some other girl for Birdy's host?" Revy asked. "I don't think so. Gomez was positive that the girl he saw leaving the hospital was Daria Morgendorffer," Salamander said.

"Well, it won't matter. She's already lost," Revy smirked.

Line Break

Hikawa and Gomez watched the hoses connected to the truck were uncoiled and then lowered into the vats of water in the treatment facility. The archaozoids then began pumping the contents of the truck into the reservoir. "Hikawa... are you _certain_ that you have enough serum to affect the entirety of Lawndale's water supply?" Gomez asked. "Of course," Hikawa said with a smug smile. "How can you be so sure?" "Please, I won't bother explaining it again, so just shut up and watch," Hikawa said in a slightly annoyed tone.

"What about the antidote? Do you have enough in case something goes wrong?" Gomez asked him. "I made enough to cover for this operation, if that's what you mean," Hikawa replied with an exasperated sigh. "What if Officer Cephon survives the present you left her at the warehouse?" Gomez asked. "That's _if_ she even manages to _find_ the warehouse," Hikawa retorted. "And you believe she won't?" Gomez asked him.

"Please, how could she possibly find us at all?" Hikawa asked. "You have a point," Gomez said as he returned his attention to the screens. Hikawa grimaced and held his right hand. Gomez looked over at him and grabbed his arm. He took off the glove covering Hikawa's hand and wrist to reveal the aged flesh underneath.

"So... it seems that your experiment is starting to reverse itself," Gomez noted. "Not soon enough to stop me from achieving my goal," Hikawa said defiantly. "Perhaps not, but nonetheless, you should return to Revy's lab to finish a more refined version of your little age-reversal project. It appears that it, as with so many other things you do, is incomplete and rushed," Gomez noted.

"I'll call Miss Revy and have her prepare one of her labs for you. I suggest that you prepare to leave soon," Gomez said as he let go of Hikawa and turned around to grab his phone. He didn't see Hikawa pull out a pistol from inside his jacket. "Yes, Salamander. It seems that Hikawa will be needing to leave early, so-aah!" Gomez grunted as Hikawa fired at him.

Hikawa fired multiple rounds into Gomez from behind, before emptying the clip and inserting a fresh one into his gun as he watched the large man slump against a control console and fall to the floor. After a minute, Gomez tried to push himself up, but Hikawa put his foot down on him and pushed him into the floor.

"You just lie there and be quiet. This is _my_ operation! I won't let anyone take it away from me. No one!" Hikawa hissed at Gomez. " _Gomez? Gomez, what's going on?_ " Salamander's voice asked through the phone on the floor. Hikawa picked up the phone. "Gomez is preoccupied with an interloper right now. He won't be available for a while. Otherwise, the operation is going according to plan. Good bye," Hikawa said into the phone before ending the call.

Hikawa walked over to a microphone. "All right! Release the serum now!" Hikawa shouted over the speakers. An archazoid walked over to a control terminal next to the reservoir and prepared to activate the release mechanism to introduce the water in the reservoir to the rest of Lawndale's supply.

Mere seconds before its finger could the press the button, a blue and tan blur shot across the room and smashed her fist into the archazoid. "Not so fast!" Birdy exclaimed as she demolished the robot. She grinned as she turned to look at the other archazoids advancing towards her. "Miss me, boys?" she teased.

Over a dozen archazoids entered the room to join the others. _Birdy... we may have a problem_ , Daria noted. "Eh, I can take 'em!" Birdy said as she leapt away from the first archazoid to reach her, performing a back-flip to land on her feet before crouching down and shooting a leg forward, kicking the archazoid's legs out from under it.

Birdy leapt onto the machine and smashed its head in with her feet before jumping into the air and spinning around to kick another archazoid, sending it flying back. She duck as one archazoid tried to grab her, and she turned around to perform an uppercut, knocking its head off before jumping up to avoid another archazoid, slamming her elbow down into its back.

"Geez, you guys are pushovers compared to the other two," Birdy said as she shot forward and punched an archazoid in the head, before grabbing it and swinging it around to smash it into a control console. Birdy made short work of the others that followed.

Line Break

In the control room, Hikawa smirked at the video feed of Birdy fighting the remaining archazoids. "You think _you_ can stop _me?_ " he asked smugly. "I'll have to teach you a lesson," he said quietly as he made his way out of the control room.

Line Break

Birdy knocked the head off of the final archazoid before grabbing it and throwing it into the pile she'd made of the others. "Damn, that felt _good,_ " she said to herself as she made her way over to the truck that had pumped the serum into the reservoir.

"You really are a nuisance," she heard someone say. She looked up and saw a Japanese man in his mid-thirties wearing a black long-coat looking down at her from a catwalk up above. "So, _you're_ the one in charge," Birdy said loudly. "Yes," Hikawa said with a smug smile. "It will be my greatest achievement once the serum finds its way into the the pipes giving water to the thousands of people living in Lawndale," Hikawa told her.

"Sorry, but that's not going to happen," Birdy said defiantly. "Oh my goodness, you really _do_ think that you can win," Hikawa said with a smile as he raised his pistol and took aim at her. "And _you_ actually think that you can stop me with that little toy?" Birdy asked mockingly before she lunged forward.

Hikawa squeezed the trigger and fired at her. Birdy managed to dodge the first round, ducking and rolling onto her side before jumping up to avoid the second and third shots fired at her. She leapt into the air at full force and flew at Hikawa. He fired at her again, grazing her cheek. She winced but didn't slow.

Hikawa fired two more times before Birdy crashed threw the rails of the catwalk and slammed him against the wall. She raised back her right fist and sent it forward, only to watch in confusion and awe as Hikawa caught her fist with his left hand. He smirked at her before releasing a small chuckle.

He then tightened his grip as his hand bulged out, tearing the glove. Most of his upper torso followed suit, revealing a muscular body. Birdy's eyes widened in shock. "Not bad for a man nearing the age of ninety, eh?" Hikawa asked her. His voice had changed its pitch to become deeper.

"W-What?" Birdy asked. _Yeah, um,_ _ **what!?**_ _How the hell is he in his eighties?_ Hikawa released a yell as a sphere of energy was released from his midsection. Birdy flew back from the force and sailed through the air, landing on the catwalks and bridges overseeing the reservoir below. Hikawa had a crazed look on his face as several pieces of floor and railing were ripped from their holdings and rose into the air around him.

He then sent the debris flying toward Birdy. "Oh shit, he's got psy-power!" Birdy exclaimed as she dodged a metal pipe that would have skewered her. She ran forward, heading for Hikawa. He raised his hand and a blue glow emanated from it as several drain covers rose up and flew around Birdy. She leaped into the air to dodge two of them before planting her feet on the third one and pushing off of it, slamming an elbow into the fourth one, breaking it. One of the other covers spun around and slammed into Birdy's back, sending her crashing to the ground.

She grunted before opening her eyes to see the she was being levitated into the air along with several other pieces of debris. "Oh crap!" she exclaimed as Hikawa sent her crashing into the ceiling. She grabbed into a metal girder as she saw Hikawa levitating himself into the air before and flying towards her.

Birdy's eyes widened as she saw a blue glow and crackle around his right fist, which he sent into her face. Birdy flew back from the force and sailed into the air before Hikawa slammed into her, grabbing her by her throat as they both crashed into a wall near the floor. As smoke and dust cleared from the crash site, Hikawa walked out into the reservoir area, holding Birdy by the throat.

He looked out at the pumps and pools of water connected to the reservoir. "There is _no one_ who can stop me now," he said to Birdy. "Behold! Soon, all of the people of Lawndale will be reborn as Retro-Soldiers! _**My**_ _Retro-Soldiers!_ " Hikawa proclaimed almost maniacally as his sanity slowly slipped away.

He tilted his head forward and grunted as he used his psy-power to turn the wheels and valves and water pumps and the drains for the pools. "N-No," Birdy rasped out as she grabbed at Hikawa's arm, trying to free herself from his grip. "Watch," he said to her.

"Watch as everything you've accomplished is rendered meaningless. All of your battles, all of your friendships, all of your hardships... soon, all of it will mean _nothing!_ " Hikawa cackled at Birdy before he focused on releasing the locks for the final fail-safes between the serum-laden water and the rest of the reservoir.

With a grin, Hikawa turned and threw Birdy into the air, watching as she slammed into a wall on the far side of the room. She slumped down onto the floor along with small chunks of the wall. As she tried to push herself up, she turned her head and saw the truck being lifted into the air, just before Hikawa sent it flying at her. She gasped and her eyes widened in surprise as the truck slammed into her, crashing through the wall.

Birdy grunted in pain as she tried to push the front grill of the truck away from her, but it was no use. _Birdy, come on! We've got to do something_ , Daria almost pleaded. "T-There's nothing we can do now. The serum is already in the water supply. We've failed," Birdy said in defeat. _What are you saying? We haven't failed! We're still alive, aren't we!? That means we still have a chance to do something!_

"It's impossible at this point. We can't even do a Hyper Resolve," Birdy replied weakly as she closed her eyes. _A what?_ "Daria, do you remember when we first met? You know, when I... fried you?" Birdy asked with a long face. _Yes. Yes, I do_ , Daria replied. "Well, the Hyper Resolve is a device kind of like that, only a thousand times more powerful," Birdy explained.

"But, we don't have one here on Earth, and it's the only thing that could possibly clean the water of the serum in enough time to save everyone," Birdy said. She heard foot steps and looked up to see Hikawa jump onto the top of the truck. He looked down at her with a sneer on his face. "Enough playing around," he said. " **Diiie!** " he shouted as he used his psy-power to push the truck forward, causing it to crash further through the wall until it broke into a hallway.

Birdy flew back and rolled on the floor. Meanwhile, Hikawa had jumped off the truck at the last second, landing several meters away. He looked back at the hole in the wall and the tail end of the truck sticking out. He smirked, just before he felt intense pain wave over him, and his body started to change. His muscles bulged more and began taking on a greenish hue and the rest of his body began transforming. He cried out in pain as his body became more reptilian and muscular.

Line Break

Birdy transformed back into Daria, and she slowly made her way towards a door that led to a staircase outside. She looked up and saw a tower with electrical cables connected to it. Daria hesitated for a few seconds, before looking back up with resolve and determination. She made her way up a ladder and began climbing to the top of the tower.

 **Daria, what are you doing!?** "What needs to be done," Daria replied shakily as she kept climbing. "Your body... it can handle a large amount of electricity, right?" Daria asked her. **Yeah, but-wait, Daria! You're not trying to make an improvised Hyper Resolve, are you!?** "It's the only option," Daria replied. "For Jane, and Quinn, Brittany, my parents, Tom... everyone," Daria said.

"I can't-no, I **won't** let them die!" she said defiantly as she pressed forward, missing a foot hold and losing her grip. She fell down, yelling out before Birdy quickly transformed and caught a handle bar. _Birdy!_ "Yep. Let's keep going," Birdy said as she resumed climbing.

After finally reaching the top and walking onto a crow's nest, Birdy looked at the cables running along from the tower to the other poles going through the town. She took a deep breath and she moved forward. "Daria... if this fails, you won't be able to be resurrected a second time. It'll be permanent," Birdy said. "Daria?" she asked after not receiving a response.

 _I... I don't want to die again, but there's no other option. Birdy, I'm scared, I really am. In fact, I'm almost terrified beyond the capacity for rational thought, which may explain why I'm going through with this in the first place, but the fact is... I can't let Revy and that scientist get away with this. Besides, if this fails, then it won't matter if I survive or not, because everyone else will be dead anyway_ , Daria replied.

"You know, Daria, having courage doesn't mean not having fear. It means being able to do what's necessary _in spite_ of having fear," Birdy said as she moved a hand forward, preparing to grip the cables. _What are you saying?_ "What I'm saying is... Daria, you are one of the bravest and most courageous people I have ever met. It's an honor to know you," Birdy said as she grabbed the power cable.

Line Break

The lights inside the plant flickered and shut off briefly, before a glowing white figure broke through the ceiling and landed on the floor. Hikawa, now almost reptilian save for a still human portion of his face, got up and looked at Birdy as she advanced. He opened his mouth and the floor beneath Birdy crumbled and became a crater as she leapt into the air and flew at him.

When Birdy got close enough, Hikawa could see a smirk on her face as she slammed into him and tackled him into the water of the reservoir. The two combatants sank beneath the surface, kicking and punching each other with ferocity. Hikawa grabbed Birdy's left arm and bit down into it, before she smashed her other hand into his eyes, causing him to let go in pain.

Birdy managed to put enough distance between herself and Hikawa that she was able to concentrate and let loose a powerful wave of energy. The light shot forth throughout the entire water system, cleansing every pipe connected to it. Hikawa opened his eyes in surprise just as the energy moved through him.

The energy moved through the pools, sending bright glowing geysers of water into the air throughout the treatment plant. Almost all of Lawndale's power grid went off for a few seconds before the power stations came back online.

Line Break

"What the hell was _that?_ " Tom asked as he looked up at the lights. "I don't know," Jane said. "If we see Daria tomorrow... we'll ask her," Jane said.

Line Break

Back at the treatment planet, Gomez looked down as Hikawa's malformed and grotesquely aged body rose to the surface and floated. He took out his cell phone and called Salamander. "The operation has failed. Officer Cephon intercepted us and Hikawa is dead," Gomez said.

Line Break

"Miss Revy," Salamander said gently, "It seems that the plan has failed. Hikawa is dead and Gomez is injured." "I see," Revy said with a frown. She then smiled. "Salamander, make the arrangements for tomorrow's flight," she said. "Yes, Ma'am," Salamander said with a nod of his head.

Line Break

Quinn Morgendorffer sat on the couch and watched the front door. She sighed wistfully before looking at the clock on the wall. "Daria..." she whispered. She began to feel something akin to fear and sadness well up inside of her as she waited and waited for her sister to return. After the clock struck midnight, Quinn let out a depressed sigh and made her way up the stairs, just before she heard a knock at the door.

Her eyes brightened and she rushed over to answer it. When she saw the person who had arrived, she smiled and did something she almost never did: she hugged her sister.

Ending Line Break

Ending Theme: The Touch, by Stan Bush, from the soundtrack for Transformers: The Movie (1986).


	8. Episode 1-08: Final Force

**DARIA THE MIGHTY**

Birdy The Mighty is property of Studio Madhouse.

Daria and Beavis and Butthead are property of Glenn Eichler, Mike Judge, and MTV.

Episode 08: Final Force

* * *

As soon as Daria entered her room, she plopped down on her bed and fell asleep. Quinn turned off the light in her sister's room and closed the door before making her way back to her own room. When Daria had arrived at front door after midnight, Quinn had been excited to see that her sister was still alive. She then did something that she never thought she would do: she hugged her.

Quinn wished that she'd had a camera to record the shocked look on Daria's face after she pulled away from her. She'd asked her sister about what had happened, but Daria had insisted that she be allowed sleep first. She had promised to tell her in the morning after waking up.

"Well," Quinn said to herself quietly, "At least she's alive."

Line Break

Bogaros looked down at the money that Christella Revy had presented to him. "When do you want me to carry it out?" he asked her. "Before the end of the week," she said. "You'll be gone by then," Bogaros noted. "Yes, but Gomez will still be here cleaning up Hikawa's mess and dealing with things while I'm away. Aside from this mission I've given you, you are to listen to Gomez and follow his instructions," Revy said.

"This mission is the only exception, as I have given it to you directly," she clarified. "I see. So, just the one?" he asked her. "You have only one primary target. All others are secondary and should be dealt with _only_ after your take care of the primary target," Revy said as she prepared her research notes and supplies for her flight. "Right, the primary target. What's her name again?" Bogaros asked her.

Revy's lips curled into a smile and she narrowed her eyes. "Daria Morgendorffer," she said.

Line Break

Jane opened her eyes groggily and looked over to see Trent sleeping in the chair next to her bed. Tom was asleep too, although he was using the sleeping bag that Daria had left behind. Jane almost chuckled at the sight.

About an hour later, the door to the room opened. "Brittany?" Jane asked as the blonde walked into the room. "H-Hi... Jane," Brittany said timidly. "Brittany, what are _you_ doing here?" Jane asked curiously. "Well, I... I was the one who... you know, shot you, and... and I-I-I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" Brittany cried as she ran over to Jane and tried to hug her.

Jane's eyes widened in shock and confusion. "I-I forgive you, just... I can't breathe! Brittany, I can't-please let go!" Jane rasped. "Sorry!" Brittany apologized as she backed away from Jane. "I... I just wanted to make sure that you were all right," Brittany said in an apologetic tone. "Well, here I am, alive," Jane said.

"So... how, um, how are you feeling?" Brittany asked hesitantly. "Well, I'm not _too_ bad, to be honest. Although, I've been in an environment that seems to suppress artistic creativity. As soon as I get home, I'm gonna paint me a canvas the size of... um, well it'll be big!" Jane said with a smile.

"Um, Jane, I've been wondering... when are you going to be released?" "Probably by tomorrow," Jane said. "That, um, that's good," Brittany said. "So... is there anything..." "Yes?" Jane asked. "Anything that... um, that, well..." "Come on, out with it," Jane implored. "Is there anything I can do to make this up to you?" Brittany asked her.

"I... Brittany, I know that you were being controlled by Marionette. You didn't have a choice in the matter," Jane said calmly. "I know it might seem odd, but, well, I don't exactly hold it against you. Now, if you'd willingly shot me for fun, then I'd probably sue your for every penny that you've got, but you didn't, so... you know," Jane replied.

"Right. Well... how much is this going to cost you?" Brittany asked her. "Huh?" Jane asked her. "Well, emergency room visits are kind of expensive if you don't have insurance. I'll pay the co-pay for you," Brittany offered. Jane's eyes widened as she listened to Brittany's words, which also triggered a memory from Saturday, when Helen Morgendorffer returned to the hospital after stopping at both Casa Lane and her own house.

"Oh _shit_ ," Jane whispered just loud enough that Brittany caught it. "Jane?" she asked the other girl. "Brittany... I'm not-wait, Trent!" Jane yelled. "Could you wake him up?" Jane asked her. "Um, sure, I guess," Brittany replied. "Um, T-Trent? Could you, like, please wake up? Your sister needs you," Brittany said as she walked over and gently shook the older male by the shoulders.

"Get some cold water," Jane said. "Um, I don't know if I would be allow to do that," Brittany said. "Well, what about-" "Ah!" Brittany looked down and stepped back after hearing a cry of pain from below. She looked down and finally noticed Tom lying on the floor in a sleeping bag.

"Um... Tom, right?" Brittany asked. She'd only met him once, at Pizza King just before Daria and Birdy's fight with the gynoid. "Ow," Tom muttered as he looked up a Brittany with an accusing glare. "That was my face you stepped on," Tom whined. "Sorry," Brittany said as she walked carefully back to Trent, who was now blinking as he slowly stirred in the small world between asleep and awake.

"Wake him now, Brit! It's your best shot," Jane said. Brittany nodded her head as she grabbed Trent by the shoulders and shook him. "Trent, your sister wants to talk to you, so wake up!" Brittany yelled at him. "Whoa!" Trent said as he finally woke up. "Hey Janey. Hey, uh... what's your name?" Trent asked Brittany.

"I'm... Brittany Taylor. I... uh, know Jane," she said. "Oh, that's cool," Trent said. "So, what did you want to talk about?" Trent asked Jane. "Um... how much money do we have to cover this?" Jane asked him nervously. Trent looked down at the floor.

"Oh, man... I don't really know. I think we have enough, at least for the bill, but we probably won't have anything left over," Trent said. "Um.. if you guys need money for this... I can pay for it," Brittany offered. "Brittany, you don't need to do that," Jane said.

"No, I... I want to. I want to make this up to you, Jane. After all, that's what friends do, right? They help each other when they're in need," Brittany said. "You.. think that we're friends?" Jane asked her curiously. "Well, I like to think that we are," Brittany replied.

"What do you mean by making this up to her?" Trent asked. "Um, see... I was the one who... shot her," Brittany said. Trent's eyes widened at this admission. "Um... _what?_ " he asked her. "I was the one who shot her," Brittany repeated guiltily.

Trent protectively moved toward his sister. "Trent, it's okay," Jane said to him. "What? But, Janey, she-" "She was being controlled by Marionette. She didn't have much of a choice," Jane said. "What do you mean she was 'controlled' by her?" he asked. "She, I don't know, drugged her or something, like she did to everyone else at the school," Jane tried to explain.

Jane looked over at Brittany. "Brit, are you sure that you want to pay the hospital bill for me?" she asked the blond girl. "Yes," Brittany said firmly. "My family has more than enough money, and I honestly don't know what else I can do to make up for what I did to you," Brittany explained.

Jane sighed. "Okay," she said softly, "If that's what you want to do, then I'll accept your offer to pay for the hospital bill." "Thank you," Brittany said in response.

Line Break

"So, Daria..." Helen said as everyone sat down for breakfast, "Where exactly did you go last night?" "Around town," Daria replied as she ate her cereal. "Yes, but when did you get home?" Helen asked her. "I don't know. Some time after midnight, I guess," Daria replied. "There was a news report this morning that there was an incident at the local water treatment plant," Jake said.

"And?" Daria asked. "Well, it sort of happened around the time that you were gone, Kiddo," Jake said. "Daria... a lot of odd things have been happening in town lately, and with what happened at school on Friday, I think we need to have a talk," Helen said to her. "Mom, it's nothing to worry about," Daria said.

"Nothing my butt! Daria, I may not be home all the time, and neither is Jake, but we still pay attention to things concerning our children. I called the hospital to see if you had checked in to see Jane, but you weren't on the guest sign-in sheet. Now, where were you last night?" Helen asked her firmly.

"Does it really matter?" Daria asked her. "Yes, dammit! I need to know that you're okay!" Helen replied. "Well, I'm sitting here, alive and eating cereal, aren't I? I think that qualifies as being okay," Daria retorted. "Daria, we're just worried about your safety," Jake said. "Mom, Daria just walked around town trying to sort some things out in her head. That's what brains do," Quinn said.

"Yes, and she did so around the time that the water treatment plant was attacked and the power grid had a hiccup! And let's not forget about what happened at the school on Friday!" Helen snapped, turning her attention on Daria. "That Marionette girl wanted to kill you. Why?" Helen demanded.

"Mom-" "No, Daria! You're involved in something, and I'm putting an end to it now!" Helen interrupted her. Suddenly, her cell phone started ringing. "Yes?" she said as she answered it. "Yes, Eric... no Eric, I'm busy right-can it wait? Eric, I'm in the middle of breakfast with-oh, fine! I'll be there," Helen said into the phone.

"We'll continue this when I get back," Helen said as she left the kitchen. "Um, you can tell you ol' dad what's going on," Jake offered to Daria. **Daria, the longer you delay telling them the truth, the worse things will be** , Birdy noted. _But... how do I tell them about us? How can I possibly explain everything to them?_

 **Leave that to me, when the time comes** , Birdy said. "Okay, Jake! Keep an eye on the girls until I get back!" Helen called from the living room as she walked out the door.

"So... Daria, you know that you can tell your dad anything, right?" Jake asked her with a pleading smile. "Please?" he begged her. He desperately wanted his daughter to open up to him. "I... I don't know how to explain it," Daria said. "Okay," Jake said reluctantly.

"Maybe... tonight, when Mom comes back, I'll try to explain things so that everyone is on the same page," Daria said. Jake perked up a bit. "That's... good," he said. "I, uh, don't want you to feel afraid of telling me anything, Kiddo. I mean, I don't want you to be afraid of me, the way I was afraid of my own dad, the lousy rotten bastard!" Jake began to rant.

"No time to talk with his kid about their problems! No, it was always telling little Jakey what to do and how to act! Never had time for Jakey to talk and express _his_ feelings about anything!" Jake ranted. "Um, Dad-" "Heaven forbid little Jakey do anything that wasn't tough or unmanly like talking about his problems!" Jake continued. " **Dad!** " Daria snapped. "Huh?" Jake asked her.

"You were ranting again," Dari explained. "Oh. Sorry," Jake said meekly. "I'm gonna go get a shower and then head out to see Jane. I'll be back later," Daria said as she got up and went over to the stairs.

"Say, Quinn... you wouldn't happen to know what's going on, would you?" Jake asked her pleadingly. "Um... I think it would be best to let Daria answer our questions. You know, so that we don't misunderstand anything," Quinn said evasively.

Line Break

Bogaros looked at the data sheet and profile for Daria Morgendorffer. He sighed in frustration as he placed the paper down on the table. He heard the sound of footsteps as Gomez walked over to him. "Is something wrong?" Gomez asked him. "Yes. My mission is problematic in regards to its time frame."

"You only have until the end of the week," Gomez said. "Unfortunately," Bogaros responded with a sigh. "And you have a problem with these orders because..." "Too much has gone wrong too quickly," Bogaros said. "Because so much has happened in the past three days, this will only draw more attention to us." "I see," Gomez said.

"So, do you plan on waiting until the end of the week?" Gomez asked him. "No. I'll do it today or tomorrow. Despite my reservations, I want to get it over with as quickly as possible," Bogaros replied. "I see. In that case, I'll leave you to your task," Gomez said as he began to walk away.

"You aren't going to wish me luck or anything?" Bogaros asked him. "No. Not for this mission," Gomez replied as he exited the room. "Hikawa was right. You're too soft," Bogaros whispered as he picked up the profile papers again.

Line Break

When Daria entered Jane's room, she saw Brittany sitting next to her, talking quite animatedly about something. Trent was asleep in his chair. Brittany and Jane both turned to look at Daria. "Hey, Daria," Brittany said. "Uh, hi, Brittany," Daria said hesitantly.

"Daria, where's your jacket?" Brittany asked. "Um, I really don't know. Last I saw it was being used to keep pressure on Jane's wound when the paramedics showed up. I haven't seen it since they took her to the emergency room," Daria replied. "They may have discarded it since it was covered in blood," Jane suggested.

"Probably. I'll probably have to get a new one at some point," Daria said. "So... what have I missed?" Daria asked. "Well, Brittany's offered to pay for my hospital bill," Jane said. Daria raised an eyebrow. "Really?" she asked Brittany.

"Mmhmm. It's the least I could do after what happened," Brittany replied. "She insisted on it," Jane said with a smirk. "So, you wanna' tell us what happened last night?" Jane asked Daria. Daria looked over her shoulder and made sure that the door was closed as she sat down on a chair. She saw her sleeping bag folded up on another chair.

"Where's Tom?" Daria asked Jane. "He went to the bathroom a short while ago. He should be back soon," Jane replied. "Okay. Well, about last night... as it turns out, that Gomez guy was right. That scientist really _was_ planning on dumping of kind of serum into Lawndale's water supply, and he almost succeeded," Daria said.

"But you stopped him in the nick of time, right?" Jane asked her. "Actually, I almost failed. Using Birdy's body, I had to actually collect a large amount of electricity from the power grid and jump into the reservoir to clean the water," Daria replied. Everyone's eyes widened, except for Trent's. "You... you almost fried yourself?" Jane asked her. "It was the only option. If I hadn't, then right now everyone would be exposed to that guy's serum and would be turning into monsters," Daria replied.

"He'd already used the serum on himself, apparently, and almost managed to kill us. We won by the narrowest of margins," Daria said. "Daria..." Brittany whispered. "Hey guys, I'm-oh, hey, Daria!" Tom said as he entered the room. "Does this mean I have to repeat myself?" Daria asked Jane. "Afraid so," Jane said humorously. "Tom, take a seat," Daria said to him.

"Sure," he replied as he lifted Daria's sleeping bag up and sat down on his chair. "So, what is it that you don't want to repeat?" Tom asked Daria. "Since we're all here, I guess I'll just start from after I left the hospital," Daria began.

Line Break

Bogaros walked along the sidewalk with a suitcase in his hands. He looked down at the paper in his hands. "Damn," he muttered as he looked back up at a street sign, "I turned at the wrong street corner."

Line Break

"No, Stacey. I already told you that I was late because my stupid alarm clock didn't go off when it was supposed to!" Quinn said into her phone. " _But Quinn! Sandi's still mad at you because she thinks that you think that you were too good to join the rest of us in whatever it was that happened!_ "

"Well who cares if that's what Sandi thinks!? I was late because of my alarm clock and that's the truth!" Quinn retorted. " _I know that, but if I agree with you, then Sandi will get mad at_ _ **me!**_ _"_ "Stacey, grow a backbone already!" Quinn said. She looked out her window at the dark night sky. It was already 08:30 pm.

Line Break

Helen Morgendorffer sighed a she drove home. She had already made a brief stop at the hospital to check on Daria's friend, Jane. After being informed that Daria had already left and was on her way home, Helen decided to see if she could find her daughter on the sidewalk and talk to her in the privacy of her car.

After driving for a few more minutes, she came across Daria on the sidewalk. "Daria," Helen said after rolling down the window, "Would you like a ride home?" Daria blinked as she looked at her mother. "You won't take no for an answer, will you?" Daria asked her. "No. Get in the car, Sweetie," Helen said.

Daria sighed and walked over to the passenger seat, getting in the car and closing the door before securing her seat belt. _Here it comes. The Spanish Inquisition_ , she thought to herself. **There's no avoiding it. Just let me handle things... preferably** _ **before**_ **your mother drives into an area with heavy traffic** , Birdy suggested.

"Mom... there _is_ something I need to tell you. I was hoping that it could wait until we get home, but I don't want to get cold feet, so... here's what I've been hiding from everyone for the past couple of months: I'm sharing a body with an alien police officer," Daria said flatly.

Helen blinked and almost chuckled. "Trying to lighten up the mood to make the truth seem more shocking, or less shocking?" Helen asked her. "That is the truth," Daria replied. "Daria, now is not the time for jokes," Helen warned. "Okay, let me prove it to you," Daria said. "Stop the car first, I promise I won't get out," Daria requested. Helen mulled over this and decided to humor her daughter.

"Okay, prove that you're telling the truth," Helen said as she parked the car and hit the emergency lights. Daria transformed into Birdy, without the modulator. "Do you believe your daughter now?" Birdy asked her with a smirk. Helen's eyes widened and her jaw dropped in shock and confusion.

"W-W-What's going on? Who are you!? Where is my daughter!?" Helen shrieked at Birdy. "Your daughter is right here, Helen! She's sharing my body!" Birdy replied. "I don't-how does that make any sense?" Helen asked. "A couple of months ago... I had an accident involving your daughter. A criminal I was chasing used her as a decoy and I accidentally electrocuted her. To save her life, I merged her mind with my body while an organic replacement is being built in my ship," Birdy explained.

Helen shook her head in disbelief. "N-No. No, this... did you say that you _killed_ my **baby!?** " Helen asked in outrage. "Her body, yes, but her mind-" WAPOW! Birdy was interrupted as Helen punched her in the face. "You _fucking_ _ **CUNT!**_ " Helen roared at her. "I told you, it was an accident! The Daria you've been interacting with this whole time is still the same Daria you gave birth to! Her mind is just in a temporary placeholder until a new body can be finished!" Birdy yelled at Helen.

"Then what about the body she has now?" Helen asked her venomously. "It's my body, but I'm able to adjust the cellular structure to match that of Daria's original body. Once Daria's new body is finished, her mind will be transferred to her new body, and I will leave you all alone. You can resume your lives as best you can," Birdy said.

"Then tell me... what really happened at the school on Friday?" Helen asked her. "What Daria told you was the truth, but with a few details left out. For instance, she changed into me as soon as possible, and when we ran into Quinn, we changed in front of her to convince her of our story," Birdy said.

"What about Jane? Does she know?" Helen asked her. "Jane has known since the day after the accident, when the criminal I'd been tracking attacked us and I had to transform in order to protect her. Jane has been fighting by our side and supporting us every step of the way," Birdy said. "So, Quinn knows about this?" Helen asked her.

"Yes, but only the very basics. We haven't told her everything yet," Birdy said. "What about that teacher; Mr. DeMartino?" Helen asked. "We had to tell him in order to get him to help us on Friday. Until we changed form to convince him, he was under the impression that he'd finally gone mad from years of stress," Birdy replied.

"Brittany knows as well," Birdy added. "The girl who shot Jane?" Helen asked her. "Yes. She's known for that last two months, ever since her brother was killed," Birdy said. "Killed? I thought he was still missing," Helen said. "No. An alien criminal named Bacillus devoured and absorbed Brian into his body. Brittany discovered the truth the next day when Jane and I joined her in her search for her brother."

"We ended up encountering Bacillus, and he tried to take her brother's form to lure her into a trap. Jane and I managed to save her, and after an exhausting fight, we managed to kill Bacillus. Well, Brittany did, when she set him on fire," Birdy said. "What happened last night, when Daria disappeared?" Helen asked her.

"We discovered that a scientist named Hikawa was planning to dump an experimental super soldier serum into Lawndale's water supply. We were told this by another criminal, who used the alias of Gomez. He's an associate of a woman named Christella Revy, who is an Alterrian like me, only much older and much smarter," Birdy explained. "Revy is a brilliant scientist, but some time ago, she went rogue. I managed to track her here, to Earth, and I've been fighting proxy battles against her ever since," Birdy told Helen.

"And everything that's happened in the past couple of months has been caused by her?" Helen asked skeptically. "Mostly. Bacillus was operating independently of Revy's influence, I think, but otherwise every fight I've had and every incident of destruction can be traced back to Christella Revy, including last night's incident, since Hikawa was working for Revy," Birdy explained.

"I'm not sure I understand. If this Gomez fellow is an associate of Revy, why would he ask you to stop one of her operations?" Helen asked her. "Because the serum wasn't ready, and an outbreak or incident involving the entire population of Lawndale would be enough to get the attention of the rest of the Space Federation and have them send more officers here, which would be bad for Revy," Birdy said.

"Gomez was protecting Revy by sabotaging an already flawed plan and stopping it from ending in disaster," Birdy explained. "Doctor Hikawa had already injected himself with the serum, but as Gomez said, it wasn't ready. He almost succeeded with his plan, and in the end, we had to clean the entire water supply by improvising a Hyper Resolve," Birdy said.

"A what?" Helen asked her. "A Hyper Resolve is a weapon that conducts and produces massive amounts of electricity in a controlled form. I don't have one with me, so Daria and I were forced to improvise, but in the end, we succeeded," Birdy explained. "Helen, Daria and I have been putting our lives on the line with every fight in order to keep you and the rest of Lawndale safe," Birdy said.

"Then why hide this from us?" Helen asked her. "It was Daria's idea. I wanted to inform you right away, but she insisted that doing so would just make things more complicated for us. She was afraid of how you would react. As it turns out, telling you sooner may have actually been the smarter choice, if only we had taken it," Birdy said.

"The incident at the school; was Revy involved with that?" Helen asked her. "Yes. Marionette was one of Revy's associates, and Marionette discovered our identities, which means that Revy knows as well," Birdy said solemnly. "Helen, your daughter needs you, and Jake. She needs your support, no matter how much she denies it," Birdy said to Helen.

"Now, maybe we should head home. Well, your home, anyway," Birdy said as she reclined in the seat. "I'll transform back into Daria before we arrive," Birdy said as she looked at Helen. Helen turned off the emergency lights and started the car up again.

Line Break

Jake was watching the TV in the living room when he heard the doorbell ring. He sighed as he got up and went to answer it. "Hello?" he asked as he saw the red-bearded man wearing a brown duster. "Um, can I help you?" Jake asked him. "I hope so. Does Daria Morgendorffer live here?" the man asked him.

"Why do you want to know?" Jake asked him warily. "It's very important," the man said in an impatient tone. Jake looked him over. "Um, what's your name?" Jake asked the man. "Most people call me Bogaros," he replied. "Uh-huh... I'm afraid she's not home right now," Jake said, clearly getting a bad vibe from Bogaros.

"Then I'll wait," Bogaros said as he stepped inside. "Uh, hey! No, this is my house and I don't want you in here," Jake said firmly. Bogaros grabbed him by the throat and lifted him into the air. "I don't care," he said dismissively.

Line Break

Helen pulled the car up to the driveway quietly before parking it and turning off the engine. She looked over at Birdy, who was still sitting in Daria's clothes. "I thought you said you were going to transform?" Helen asked her as she took the key out of the ignition. "I will, but I think I'd like to see how observant Jake is. I know that you are aware of just how oblivious he can be, and I just have to say that it really gets on my nerves. Are all fathers like that?" Birdy replied.

"No. not all fathers are," Helen said quietly. "Some are observant, some are negligent, some are cruel, some are tough, some are supportive, and some... some are oblivious, despite their best efforts. No father is perfect," Helen said. "Neither are mothers, are they?" Birdy asked in response.

"Well..." Helen's eyes narrowed as she looked over at Birdy. "You were pretty pissed when you found out that I'd killed Daria. If you weren't even a half-way decent mother, then you wouldn't have cared," Birdy said. "What was your own mother like?" Helen asked her. "Never had one," Birdy replied. "Huh?" Helen asked her.

"I have no parents. I never did," Birdy said to her. Helen raised an eyebrow. "I was "born" in a laboratory. Most alterrians are genetically engineered, so we have no true parents to speak of. Some alterrians are capable of reproduction, but there are only a few of them in the entirety of the Federation," Birdy explained.

"I'm what you'd call a... test-tube baby, if you will," she said. Helen sighed as a look of understanding came over her face. "I see. Were we the closest you've ever come to having a family?" she asked her. Birdy chuckled. "You know, Daria asked me that exact same question when I told her about my origins," she said with a smile.

"Did she?" Helen asked. "Yeah. And to answer your question, yes. These past couple of months are the first taste of an actual family life that I've ever had," Birdy replied as she reclined in the seat and looked over at Helen. "Of course, I don't think of either of you as surrogate parents or anything. I'm a bit old for that," Birdy said.

"How old... are you?" Helen asked her. "I'm in my twenties, to be honest. Twenty-six standard years, by the Federation calendar system. An Earth year seems to be close enough that I'd be considered twenty-six here as well," Birdy explained.

"So..." "So... I guess I _won't_ freak out Jake. Well, not intentionally, anyway, but I think it's easier for everyone if I walk in as I am and then transform into Daria to prove my point. Oh, and for the record, certain injuries inflicted upon me _do_ get transferred to Daria's "body" when I transform back into her," Birdy said as she got out of the car. "Really?" Helen asked her.

As they walked up to the front door, Birdy immediately stopped and held a hand out for Helen to do the same. "Something's wrong," Birdy said quietly. The curtains for the windows were drawn, and the lights were out, yet as she slowly and carefully turned the door knob, she realized that the front door was unlocked.

Birdy slowly backed away. "Helen," she whispered, "We need to go around back. The front door is unlocked and the lights are out." "Jake probably forgot to lock the door before going to bed," Helen said. "When does he normally go to bed?" Birdy asked her pointedly. "After... oh," Helen said as realization dawned on her.

"We have an uninvited visitor. Take off your shoes, and I'll take off Daria's boots. We'll quietly make our way to the back door and carefully get inside from there," Birdy whispered to her. Helen nodded her head as she glanced back over at the windows. "We need to move quickly," Birdy said.

Line Break

Birdy and Helen moved quietly towards the back of the house, with Helen slowly and carefully placing her key in the lock of the back door. She slowly turned the key and held her breath when the lock clicked. After waiting a minute, she and Birdy quietly opened the door and entered the house, keeping the lights turned off.

After slowly closing the door behind them, they made their way through the kitchen and Helen slowly peeked around the corner and looked into the living room. It seemed to be empty, save for a dark figure sitting on the couch. Before Helen could retreat back into the kitchen, the light came on and a gloved hand clasped around her mouth.

"Where is the other one?" asked the voice from behind her. "She has to be here with you, Helen," the man said. "Don't worry about your husband and other daughter; they're still alive," he said as he slowly moved them into the living room. Helen could see Jake and Quinn both tied up and sitting on the couch.

"I'm only after Daria," the man said. Helen's eyes widened in fear, for herself and her family. "We can do this the easy way, where I uncover your mouth and you tell me her location, or we can do it the hard way," he said.

"Which-" **BAM!** Helen stumbled forward as the man let go of her. She turned around to see Birdy in a fighting stance, her right arm outstretch and her hand clenched into a fist. The man was leaning against the door frame as he looked over at Birdy.

She cracked her knuckles and looked at him with disdain. "Who the hell are you?" she asked, her voice laced with venom. "Bogaros. Your executioner," he said. "Did Christella Revy send you?" she asked as she stepped forward.

"Yes. A final parting gift," he replied. "What do you mean?" "She left today, and I don't know where she went," Bogaros said. "So, how about you let me kill you and collect my paycheck?" Bogaros suggested. "It's nothing personal, just business," he added.

Birdy frowned, before she rushed over and sent a fist flying at him, only to receive a kick in the face. Bogaros jumped to his feet and took off his duster before running forward and punching Birdy in the stomach. He grabbed her hair and pulled her head up before punching her in the face, bloodying her nose.

She grabbed his arm and pulled him forward, backing away as he slammed into the wall, giving her a chance to spin around and kick him in the back. Helen rushed over to Quinn and Jake, trying to untie their ropes. She decided to simply grab them one at a time and pull them into the kitchen as Birdy and Bogaros continued their fight.

Bogaros turned around and ducked as Birdy delivered a high-kick into the wall. He lunged forward and punched her in the crotch, smirking as she fell to the floor and gasped in pain. He moved forward and Birdy gasped in pain as she sent a kick into his stomach, causing him to stagger back into the wall.

Helen quickly grabbed a large kitchen knife and began cutting Jake and Quinn free of their bindings. She heard the grunts and yells as Birdy and Bogaros waged their battle in the living room. She turned her head to Birdy leap onto the wall before pushing off and flying into Bogaros, tackling him and sending them both out of sight.

Bogaros grabbed Birdy and threw her at the other wall, which she landed on feet first and launched forward from. He smirked and kicked a leg into the air, knocking her to the ground painfully. Bogaros quickly rolled away from the alterrian and stood up.

He pulled a large knife out from his belt and prepared to stab her when he felt someone tap him on the shoulder. He turned his head and received a blast of cooking oil in his face. "Take that!" Quinn cried as she sprayed more PAM at his eyes. He cried out before wiping at Quinn with his knife. She yelped as the blade succeeded in cutting a gash into her arm.

"Quinn!" Helen screamed. Birdy leapt onto her feet and grabbed Bogaros, flipping him over and sending both of them onto their backs. Birdy quickly got up as Bogaros kicked her, sending her stumbling into the couch. Bogaros scooted away and began to stand up.

Birdy growled and stood up, grabbing underneath the couch and lifting it into the air. "Everyone get out of the way!" Birdy shouted before she threw the couch at Bogaros. He gasped as the large piece of furniture crashed into him, sandwiching him between in at the wall. He took a deep breath and then pushed the couch back sending it flying into Birdy. She crashed along the floor and the couch skidded on top of her.

She quickly lifted the couch off of her and staggered forward before she leaped out of the way as Bogaros slashed at the air with his knife. She grabbed his arm and jumped into the air, kicking Bogaros in the face. He stumbled back as Birdy dropped to the floor and picked herself up. She ran forward and jabbed at the air as Bogaros ducked her attack and kicked her.

As she spun around, Bogaros slashed at her back with his knife. "Aah!" Birdy cried out before she turned around and ducked before kicking Bogaros in the torso. She grabbed his arm and bit into it, causing him to cry out as he dropped his knife. She quickly elbowed him in the face and kicked him in the torso again, sending him crashing into the TV. Birdy stepped forward and fell onto one knee.

She gasped and took several deep breaths as she looked at the recovering Bogaros. **It's my only chance!** Gritting her teeth, she ran forward and delivered a flying kick to Bogaros's face, sending him crashing into the wall. As he slumped forward, Birdy retrieved a small blue object from her hair and placed it onto Bogaros. She stepped back and clicked her hair piece, causing a blue orb to envelop Bogaros. The orb sailed through the living room, squeezing itself out of the door and rose into the air.

Birdy then collapsed onto the floor as her world faded to black.

Line Break

Opening her eyes, Birdy Cephon Altera looked around at the living room. It was still a mess from the battle with Bogaros, but it seemed that the couch-she looked down and realized that she was lying on it. "Oh," she said quietly. She heard footsteps and saw Helen and Jake looking at her. "Morning... Helen. Jake," she said. _Wow. You sound so enthusiastic to be alive_ , Daria muttered.

 **And good morning to you too** , Birdy replied sarcastically. "So... Jake, how much do you know about your oldest daughter?" Birdy asked him. "Helen and Quinn both told me," he said with a concerned frown. Birdy took a breath. "Where's Quinn?" Birdy asked them. "She's at school right now," Helen said.

"Oh. So... you guys want to hear the full story? I mean, we've got the time," Birdy said. "Sure," Jake said. Helen nodded.

Line Break

Jane opened the door to the Morgendorffer residence and slowly walked inside. "Hey, Amigas... what's up?" Jane asked as she looked at Daria, who was resting on the couch. "A lot," Daria replied. Jane walked over slowly and carefully sat down next to Daria. "Shouldn't you be resting?" Daria asked her. "I'm good, as long as I take things slow for another week," Jane replied.

"Well... Christella Revy made one last effort to kill me and Birdy last night," Daria said as she motioned to the living room's state of change. "Mom's hired a cleaning crew to come in and fix up the place, but they won't be here for a few more hours," Daria added.

"What about Revy?" Jane asked her. "Don't know. She's left the country, so we won't be seeing her for a while. I don't think she's left the planet, though," Daria replied. "What about your parents?" Jane asked her. "They know. Birdy and I told them everything. We had to after one of Revy's henchmen attacked me in front of them," Daria said.

"How are they taking it?" Jane asked. "As well as you'd expect. Last night, when Birdy revealed herself to my mom after she picked us up, she slugged Birdy," Daria said. "Whoa, why?" Jane asked. "Birdy told her about the accident. At least I know my mom cares about me now," Daria said.

 **She's always cared about you. She just wasn't very good at showing it as much as she would have liked** , Birdy chimed in. "Damn. So, Revy's still out there and we've foiled her plans for now. What do we do?" Jane asked. "I think... we make the best of the time we have, and survive. As long as we're alive, we still have a chance," Daria said. Jane smiled at her. "You know what? That's the most optimistic thing I've ever heard you say," Jane said.

"Birdy's rubbing off on me," Daria said. "Well, as long as you don't dye your hair two separate colors, I think I can live with it," Jane said. Jane and Daria both looked over at the windows, where the sun was shining through. She held Daria's hand in her own and squeezed it. "Summer vacation starts in a few weeks. What are we gonna do?" Jane asked. "Like I said earlier. We stay alive. If anything heads our way, we'll face it together. You, me, Birdy, Brittany, Tom, and Quinn. All of us," Daria told her with her Mona Lisa smile.

 **The End... For Now**

Ending Theme: Restless Heart/Running Away With You, by John Parr, from the soundtrack for The Running Man (1987).


End file.
